Long before I lost Molly, I lost my first baby, Gordy from a heart defect and his loss followed me. I didn't plan on having kids, but Gordy was the first in a chain reaction of interesting events, and through time has shown me each of my children have played an important role in my life. In this episode, I discuss the trauma of losing my first child and how that affected my outlook when I had my other children.

Key Takeaways:

[3:58] Going off the pill and finding out I'm pregnant

[10:50] Finding out my baby has a heart defect

[17:56] The crushing realization that my baby wasn't going to live

[20:26] The nerves from giving birth to Gordy

[22:58] The aftermath of losing my baby and donating his body

[28:11] Having my second child, Gracie and getting married

[34:58] The importance of each of my children and the pain of child loss

[36:44] Thank you to the people who helped me

Resources from this episode:

• Ellie's way grief group
• Ellie's Way

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November 9, 2021

Podcast: A Thousand Tiny Steps

Episode #: 10

The Loss of my First Child