We split the parenting and household tasks 50/50. So why am I still the one noticing, remembering, planning and making sure everything gets done?

Equal parenting is often described as dividing everything down the middle: night feeds, nappies, nursery runs, cooking and housework. But completing half the visible tasks isn’t necessarily the same as carrying half the responsibility.

In this episode, I explore:

• why splitting tasks equally doesn’t automatically remove the default parent

• the difference between doing something and taking full ownership of it

• how “just tell me what to do” leaves the mental load with one person

• why noticing, remembering and thinking ahead are part of the work

• how scorekeeping begins when one or both partners feel unseen

• why arguments about bins, washing and dinner are often about something deeper

• how family needs change through illness, pregnancy, work pressure and different seasons of life

• what fair parenting can look like when an exact 50/50 split isn’t possible

A partner might cook dinner, do bath time and take out the bins while you remain responsible for knowing what needs to happen, when it needs to happen and what will go wrong if it doesn’t. The task has moved, but the mental load hasn’t.

Fair parenting doesn’t mean that both people must always do exactly the same amount. Life changes, capacity changes and sometimes one partner will need to carry more. But both people should feel seen, supported and responsible for the family they are building together.

The goal isn’t perfect maths. It’s no longer having one parent act as the family’s manager while the other waits to be assigned a task.

👭 The Five Villages Every Mum Needs⁠⁠⁠ If this conversation resonated, download my free audio guide, The 5 Villages Every Mum Needs, where I explore the different kinds of support modern mothers need and why so many of us feel like we’re doing it alone. ⁠⁠⁠Get it here.⁠⁠⁠

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.

We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode?

TikTok ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@nataliek.martin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natalie.kmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.

Have you become the shouty mum you always said you'd never be? This week, I'm talking about something so many mums experience but so few feel able to admit: anger.

I explore why mum rage is rarely just about the moment itself, what might be sitting underneath it, and how the realities of modern motherhood can leave us carrying more than any one person was ever meant to. I also talk about the guilt we feel and why children don't need perfect parents, they need repair.

If you've ever finished shouting and been left feeling overwhelmed by guilt, this episode is for you.

👭 The Five Villages Every Mum Needs⁠⁠ this FREE audio guide will walk you through the different levels of support mums need, and how to build them. ⁠⁠Get it here.⁠⁠

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.

We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode?

TikTok ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@nataliek.martin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natalie.kmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.

Why is my kid always the one running off, climbing everything, touching everything or having the enormous public meltdown while everyone else’s child seems so calm?

After travelling with my almost three-year-old, I found myself watching children his age quietly walking beside their parents or sitting peacefully through a flight and thinking, “Why can’t it be that easy for me?”

I love my son fiercely and wouldn’t change who he is. He is funny, adventurous, imaginative, strong-willed, sensory-seeking and emotionally intense. He loves big and lives big. But that also means I have to parent big, and sometimes it is completely exhausting.

In this episode, I talk honestly about:

• the shame of wondering why your child seems harder to parent

• comparing a wild or strong-willed child with calmer children

• questioning whether their behaviour is somehow your fault

• how a child’s temperament shapes their mum’s experience

• why the same parenting advice won’t work for every child

• the different demands of anxious, highly sensitive, neurodivergent or medically complex children

• how your child’s needs can affect work, relationships, friendships and mental health

• wishing motherhood felt easier without wishing for a different child

There is no perfect temperament. Every child brings their own gifts and challenges, and every mum is parenting a different human inside a different family structure.

Loving your child and finding them difficult to parent are not opposites. Sometimes the child doesn’t need to become less. The mum needs more capacity, recovery and support to hold everything they bring.

👭 The Five Villages Every Mum Needs⁠ this FREE audio guide will walk you through the different levels of support mums need, and how to build them. ⁠Get it here.⁠

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.

We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode?

TikTok ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@nataliek.martin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natalie.kmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.

Why are so many millennial mums trying to recreate the 90s childhood we remember for our own children?

We want them playing outside, getting bored, spending less time on screens and making simple memories that don’t need to be photographed or posted. But the childhood we’re nostalgic for wasn’t created solely by parents making better choices. It existed inside a completely different social structure.

In this episode, I explore:

• why millennial parents feel so nostalgic for a simpler childhood

• the pressure to recreate our memories for our own children

• how less surveillance and fewer frightening news stories gave children more freedom

• the role of neighbours, social housing, youth clubs and local community

• why sending children outside to play was often necessity rather than intentional parenting

• how work, childcare costs and school holidays make unstructured time difficult to create

• the pressure to manufacture magical childhood memories

• why technology is part of the change, but not the whole explanation

Our parents weren’t necessarily more present or intentional. They had phones, television and their own distractions too. But they were parenting within a world where children had greater independence and families often had more informal community around them.

There are valuable things we can carry forwards from a 90s childhood: less screen time, more outdoor play, ordinary family life and room for boredom. But we shouldn’t turn nostalgia into another impossible standard for modern mums.

The childhood we remember wasn’t created by one endlessly present mother. It was supported by the world around her.

👭 The Five Villages Every Mum Needs this FREE audio guide will walk you through the different levels of support mums need, and how to build them. Get it here.

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.

We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode?

TikTok ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@nataliek.martin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natalie.kmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.

What happens when you’re getting more sleep but still waking up completely exhausted?

After separation, moving house, working, parenting and months of pushing through without properly recovering, I reached a point where my body and brain began to feel like they had nothing left. I was sleeping, but I was still waking up groggy, foggy and physically depleted.

In this episode, I explore the difference between ordinary tiredness, rest and the deeper recovery many mums are missing.

We talk about:

• maternal exhaustion that doesn’t disappear after a few early nights

• brain fog, forgetfulness, heavy limbs and feeling as though you’re functioning behind glass

• why time away from your children often becomes time for housework and life admin

• the difference between briefly stopping and feeling genuinely replenished

• how mums can continue functioning while running almost entirely on empty

• why chronic depletion has become normalised as part of modern motherhood

• identifying the places, practices and experiences that actually restore you

Sleep matters, but motherhood can make uninterrupted recovery almost impossible. Even when you’re technically resting, part of you may remain responsible, alert and available to everyone else.

This is an honest reflection on reaching the edge of my own resilience and recognising that recovery cannot consist solely of occasional naps, coffee dates or tiny pockets of time between responsibilities. Mums need consistent space to replenish, not just enough energy to keep functioning.

Persistent or worsening exhaustion can also have physical or mental health causes. This episode shares my personal experience and isn’t a substitute for medical advice.

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.

We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode?

TikTok ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@nataliek.martin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natalie.kmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.

How do you keep your culture alive for your child when they’re growing up somewhere else?

My son is British and German, with Jamaican heritage, and is growing up in southern Germany. As he gets older, I’m realising that raising a mixed-heritage child abroad involves far more than teaching him two languages. It means making deliberate choices about the stories, traditions and parts of myself I want him to carry with him.

In this episode, I talk about:

• passing on British books, nursery rhymes, celebrations and childhood memories

• keeping English alive when I’m now the only person regularly speaking it with him

• helping him feel connected to his Jamaican heritage when there is very little local representation

• watching him develop roots in a place that may never feel quite the same to me

• raising a mixed-race child in a predominantly white environment

• why “I don’t see colour” isn’t enough when the world will see your child differently

• navigating education, belonging and cultural identity in another country

• the beauty and pressure of giving a child more than one culture and sense of home

There is so much richness in raising a child across cultures. But there can also be grief in realising that the traditions they absorb naturally may not be yours, while parts of their heritage could disappear unless you intentionally keep them alive.

This is an honest reflection on language, race, identity and the responsibility I feel to help my son know all the different parts of who he is.

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.

We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode?

TikTok ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@nataliek.martin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natalie.kmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.

It has been a BIG week (or two), and sometimes you need to be given permission to take a break.

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.

We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode?

TikTok ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@nataliek.martin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natalie.kmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.

Starting over after a breakup with kids isn’t just heartbreak.

It’s boxes everywhere.
Admin.
Bills.
Furniture.
Childcare.
Internet that still doesn’t work.
Trying to build stability for your child while your entire life is being rebuilt around them.

In this episode, I’m talking honestly about the practical and emotional reality of separating with children, moving into my new apartment, rebuilding life from scratch and the hidden labour nobody really prepares mothers for.

This is for the mums carrying grief, logistics, parenting and survival all at the same time.

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.

We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode?

TikTok ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@nataliek.martin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natalie.kmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.

Separation with kids changes your finances overnight.

In this episode, we’re talking about money after a breakup, and what child maintenance actually covers, and what it doesn’t.

Because this is where a lot of the confusion and conflict starts.

We cover:

• what child maintenance is really for
• why it often doesn’t stretch as far as expected
• the hidden financial load many mums are already carrying
• why money conversations after separation feel so charged

If you’re navigating separation, or you might be one day, this will help you understand what’s really going on.

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.

We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode?

TikTok ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@nataliek.martin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natalie.kmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.

When you have children together, a breakup is rarely one clean exit. The relationship ends, but the shared life doesn’t.

You can’t simply cut contact, disappear to heal or make decisions based only on what you need. You’re still parenting, coordinating and trying to remain civil while processing the loss of your relationship, your imagined family life and the future you thought you were building.

In this episode, I talk honestly about what makes breaking up when you have kids so different, including:

• grieving while continuing to show up for your children

• living together after separation because money or housing makes an immediate move impossible

• disentangling routines, finances, family relationships and shared responsibilities

• deciding how childcare, holidays and handovers will work

• losing not only the relationship but the future and family structure you imagined

• trying to protect your children without suppressing everything you feel

• separating abroad when your support network and home country are elsewhere

A breakup with children is both emotional and structural. You may be dealing with anger, grief, guilt and self-doubt while also searching for housing, arranging child maintenance, completing paperwork and working out a new co-parenting rhythm.

If you’re going through this and wondering why you can’t simply move on, it isn’t because you’re handling the breakup badly. You’re trying to heal while remaining connected to the person and life you’re separating from. That is complicated, messy and deserving of far more understanding than it usually receives.

🎧 mentioned in this episode:
👉🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The 5 Villages Every Mum Needs ⁠ a free audio guide for mothers who feel like they were never meant to do this alone.

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.

We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode?

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☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.