Mary and Jerry celebrate 38 years of marriage and talk about “dreaming in middle age”—the gap between what you thought life would be and what it actually becomes. Using Proverbs 16:9, they discuss detoured dreams, disappointment, and staying on the same team when plans change. Jerry shares grieving the end of his Navy-admiral dream as their daughter Courtney’s needs intensified, and his ongoing goal of becoming a bestselling history author. Mary reflects on miscarriages, Courtney’s long illness and death, their son’s struggles, and the crisis of pornography addiction that damaged their marriage and faith, and how prayer, confession, and community helped rebuild. They describe resilience as grieving, taking action, and trusting God, challenge couples to name one dream each and ask how to support it, and close with a light “not so newlywed” game.

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On Father’s Day, Mary and Jerry reflect on lessons from fatherhood from multiple angles: memories of their own fathers and what parenting taught them. Jerry shares favorite moments with his dad at Boy Scout camp and watching him become a grandfather to Jonathan, along with family stories about fishing, tractors, and dominoes. Mary recalls square dancing with her dad at Rockville Days and being taught practical skills—changing oil, changing a tire, and ironing uniforms—before Jerry’s deployments. They discuss “natural consequences,” work ethic, faith, and how their parents handled hardship and kept much private. Jerry describes fatherhood as always being “on,” how their parenting differed with Courtney and Jonathan, what they might do differently, and why fathers matter culturally. They close with advice to new parents, a funny Father’s Day school project story, and Jerry’s favorite part of being a grandfather.

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Mary and Jerry discuss how military families can prepare for deployment and readjust when a spouse returns, drawing on Jerry’s four Navy deployments and a demanding year of workups on the USS Enterprise. They emphasize getting paperwork and finances in order (will, power of attorney, SGLI, joint accounts, budgeting), having hard conversations about worst-case scenarios, and maintaining an emergency fund for inevitable breakdowns like appliances and cars.

They share practical ways to stay connected, including videotaping a deployed parent reading children’s books, numbering letters in the pre-internet era, and creating continuity through shared routines like reading the same book and praying together. They highlight the importance of community support, honest communication about roles and chores, getting counseling when needed, and recognizing the challenges of reintegration, especially when the returning spouse tries to take charge or feels disengaged.

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Mary and Jerry answer listener questions about meeting each other’s families, blending traditions, and navigating in-laws as newlyweds. Jerry recalls being silently “glared at” by Mary’s many brothers when he picked her up in his ’66 Mustang, while Mary shares her anxious first trip to Oklahoma and meeting Jerry’s grandmother at a small farmhouse gathering where strict kitchen rules, cows, cow pies, and competitive dominoes made a lasting impression.

They describe traditions they kept—dominoes, St. Nicholas Day ornaments, Spekulatius cookies, German donuts at Easter, and simple chocolate bunnies—and discuss setting boundaries and communicating around holiday plans, especially with distance, divorce, and caregiving needs for Courtney. They reflect on lessons and sayings from their parents, service-focused faith, and how flexibility helps families stay connected over 38 years of marriage.

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Every long marriage has a season where one of you is sinking and the other is staring off into the distance, completely oblivious. Today we talk about ours — and how to recognize yours before the unraveling begins.

Mary used to have a recurring nightmare during the hardest years of our marriage. She was sinking in quicksand, reaching for Jerry, and the more she struggled the deeper she went. He just stood there, looking off into the distance. That nightmare was a window into what was actually happening between us — the gradual uncoupling, the gentle tug on the thread of our marriage that, once pulled, was unraveling everything. If your marriage feels like a garden that hasn't been watered in a while, this episode is for you. We share the warning signs we missed and the small daily acts of weeding and watering that pulled us back from the brink.

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Let’s go all the way back to the beginning — the blind date that shouldn't have worked but did. From walks along the Annapolis waterfront to chocolate milkshakes at Chick and Ruth's Deli, we share what attracted us to each other, what red flags we overlooked, and what young Mary and young Jerry didn't know about love and marriage that we wish someone had told them. If you're dating, newly engaged, or just want a reminder of why you said yes in the first place, pull up a chair.

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Hallmark Christmas Movies | Mary & Jerry Podcast

In this episode, Mary & Jerry lean into cozy season vibes—pajamas and all—and chat about Hallmark Christmas movies. They share why they wanted to talk about them now, after a fun surprise from this past Christmas season: their Instagram Christmas movie reviews ended up going viral.

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Empty Nesters 2.0 | Mary & Jerry Podcast S3E1

Season 3 is here—and a lot has happened since you last saw us. Mary & Jerry celebrate 40 years since they met (yes, Top Gun was involved), share what it was really like having their kids and grandkids move in for nine months, and unpack Jerry’s major career change after 40 years in defense. Mary also reveals what it took to get her newest book (on the gifts of the Holy Spirit) through theological editing, and they give you a peek into their “Empty Nester 2.0” reset—decluttering battles, DIY painting plans, and the ongoing war on cookbooks. Plus: a no-construction miracle road trip, a marriage night in Michigan, and the return of the not-so-newlywed game.

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Mary & Jerry share what their all time favorite movies are and the impact these movies made on their lives. They discuss movies ranging from Top Gun to The Notebook. Any guesses as to the first movies they saw in theaters?

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Production & Editing by Forte Catholic (ForteCatholic.com)

Mary recently went to the Given Institute Conference. There, she met many young women desiring to grow in their gifts and talents and journey alongside mentors. In this episode, Mary & Jerry discuss their experience being mentors, what it means to be a mentor, and what skills a mentor should have.

Find out more about the Given Institute: https://giveninstitute.com/

Here are Mary and Jerry’s Books:

Gen Kenneth McKenzie- The Melting Point: High Command and War in the 21st Century (https://www.amazon.com/Melting-Point-High-Command-Century/dp/1682474496)

Connect with us and our podcast on Instagram @themaryandjerrypodcast

Support the work of the show and get bonus content by supporting us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=17005526

Production & Editing by Forte Catholic (ForteCatholic.com)