The Mating Grounds Podcast

In this episode of Helping Joe, Charlie and Tucker break down Joe's recent first date and why it was awkward for him. They go deeper into why Joe doesn't like playful teasing and can't bond with male friends. Joe and Charlie open up with stories about past awful experiences where they were attacked (not teased) by their friends. Tucker gives Joe 2 key takeaways to recognize his ineffective thought patterns and behaviors. Joe also gives an update on a talk he had with the girl he is dating.

This episode is the beginning of a preview of our upcoming book, Mate: Become The Man Women Want. In this series, we go over each chapter in the book, explaining what's in it and what to expect.

In the first part of this series, Tucker, Dr. Miller, and Nils explain how this book came about, why they decided to write it, and why men need to read it.

In this Q&A, Tucker, Dr. Miller, and Nils explain how being a minimalist or financially independent and spending money on experiences are attractive to women but being cheap is NOT attractive. What matters is being generous with what you do have, which doesn't just have to be money or possessions.

In this Q&A, Tucker, Dr. Miller, and Nils explain how most men misunderstand vulnerability, why your emotional needs as a man are valid ("We're not just walking penises."), and why women actually love emotionally open (but not emotionally unstable) men. They also give small steps you can take to start practicing vulnerability in your everyday life.

For more on vulnerability, start by reading Daring Greatly by Dr. Brene Brown, the best book out there on the empirical research. And go listen to the Helping Joe series where Joe is vulnerable in a non-needy way about problems in his life that many men have but few ever talk.

This week on Helping Joe, Tucker and Nils call Joe out on his bull***t and question what his mating goals really are when his actions and priorities do not line up with what he says he wants. They go on to explain how to have a relationship talk, why people self-sabotage, and why it’s difficult to actually do the work and change to have the life you want and the women you want.

If you date the same type of crazy woman over and over again, the problem is not them, it's you. In this Q&A, Tucker, Dr. Miller, and Nils explain how to recognize crazy or bipolar women and avoid them. They also talk about why this caller has a pattern of beign attracted to them and if therapy is needed.

In this Q&A, Tucker, Dr. Miller, and Nils explain why high school, ages 15-18, are the worst years for men and dealing with women. It's important to keep this in perspective: it's normal to feel frustrated and your best years are ahead of you. We cover this in more in depth in our What Men Need To Know episode.

In this Q&A Tucker Max, Dr. Geoffrey Miller, and Nils Parker poke fun at a caller who is looking for a way to absolve himself of his absurd narcissism and ridiculous lack of self-awareness. The words he uses signal problems in his mating life that start with him. They explain where and how to start fixing them (similar to our other narcissism Q&A). On a more serious note, they answer his question of how to balance competing factors (ex. looks, intelligence, personality, etc.) when seeking a longterm mate.

In this week of Helping Joe, Tucker and Charlie talk about Joe's awful room. They dig into why he was sleeping in a closet, how his favela of a room is a reflection of how he thinks about himself, and why this is so unattractive to women. They go on to talk about having basic self-respect, why men have trouble connecting with their emotions, and how society doesn’t teach men how to express their emotions and discourages them doing so. Tucker also tells a funny story about how the Queer Eye For The Straight Guy dudes tried to makeover James Gandolfini.

*The woman in the opening clip is Charlie’s girlfriend’s reaction when she went over to Joe’s place to evaluate his room and help him improve it.

In this episode of Bad Advice, Tucker explains how repeated failure, getting rejected over and over again, actually destroys your confidence. This is absolutely NOT how confidence works. You build true confidence only through success and demonstrated performance. We have talked over and over again about the research on confidence and how this works on past episodes.