The Middle Seat

I had absolutely no business being on a dating app after Mr. Whiplash. But apparently, I needed one more first date to figure that out.

In this episode of The Middle Seat, we're getting back to the dating chaos. Just weeks after a breakup, I found myself sitting across from a man at dinner, having a perfectly normal conversation while internally begging the universe to let me go home.

There were no major red flags. No dramatic confrontation. Just absolutely zero connection and the realization that maybe I wasn't ready to date again.

But the story doesn't end there.

Two months later, a familiar face appeared in an Are We Dating the Same Guy? Facebook group, and let's just say I learned a few things about the dating world that I didn't even know existed.

We're talking about dating before you're ready, treating dating apps like social media, trusting yourself when there's no connection, and the absolutely ridiculous plot twists that make you wonder whether you should write a book.

Because sometimes dating teaches you something about yourself. And sometimes it leaves you wondering whether you just missed an opportunity to get your bills paid. 😂

🎧 Follow The Middle Seat on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or YouTube, and share this episode with a girlfriend who has a dating story you wouldn't believe.

Have you ever found out something completely unexpected about someone you went on a date with? I want to hear your stories!

For more The Middle Seat, follow along at:

@alexis.elise917 on Instagram

The Middle Seat with Alexis on YouTube

What if you could go back five years and show your younger self the life you're living today?

In this episode of The Middle Seat, we're taking a little break from the dating drama to talk about everything that happens while we're busy figuring life out.

From navigating divorce and buying my first home to finding my confidence, learning to use my voice, changing careers, building friendships, and finally launching this podcast, I'm looking back at the moments that shaped the woman I am today.

We're talking about starting over, setting boundaries, saying yes to opportunities, and realizing that your life doesn't have to look the way you originally imagined for it to be something you're proud of.

I'm also sharing a new birthday-to-birthday tradition I'm starting at 38 to remember the big milestones, the little moments, and everything in between.

Because sometimes we're so focused on what's next that we forget how far we've already come.

Your life isn't on hold while you're waiting for the next chapter. You're already living it.

And one day, you might just look back and think, Look what happened in between.

🎧 Follow The Middle Seat on Spotify or Apple Podcasts, and share this episode with someone who needs a reminder of how far they've come.

For more Middle Seat, follow along at:

@alexis.elise917 on Instagram

The Middle Seat with Alexis on YouTube

@alexis.kuzma on TikTok

Remember the guy from Episode 2? Well, there's a reason we're officially calling him Mr. Boomerang.

Because apparently, breaking up didn't mean he was actually going to stop showing up in my life.

For nearly two years, there were random texts, FaceTimes, almost-plans, unanswered questions, and a whole lot of wondering, What the hell do you actually want from me? He even managed to reappear while I was dating Mr. Whiplash—and somehow, the timing only got more ridiculous from there.

In this episode, we're picking up where that first heartbreak left off. We're talking about the exes who keep circling back, the comfort of familiar people after heartbreak, setting boundaries even when they feel mean, and realizing that someone coming back doesn't necessarily mean they've changed.

Because sometimes the closure you've been waiting for isn't an apology, an explanation, or someone finally admitting they made a mistake.

Sometimes it's realizing you don't want what you once would've given anything to have back.

And maybe the bigger question isn't why they keep coming back. It's whether you'd even choose them again.

After heartbreak, it would be easy to protect yourself by holding something back. But I don’t want to love that way.

In this episode, I’m talking about what it means to keep showing up as yourself after people have hurt you, to be vulnerable, communicate, give effort, and let someone truly know you even when there are no guarantees about how the story ends.

Because when I look back at the relationships that didn’t work, I can still say: I showed up. I loved. I tried. I was me.

We’re also talking about something I’m learning now: healing doesn’t have to happen completely on your own before you're “ready” for love. Sometimes two people enter a relationship carrying scars from completely different stories—and there can be something really beautiful about choosing to show up anyway, learning each other, and creating a relationship where healing and love can exist at the same time.

You can't predict how a relationship will end. But you can decide who you want to be while you're in it.

And that feels very The Middle Seat.

What happens when a relationship slowly turns you into a version of yourself you don’t recognize? After sharing the full Mr. Whiplash story, I’m looking at what happened inside that relationship, the anxiety, the constant questioning, the things I let slide, and the moment I realized I had stopped trusting myself.

And because the timing couldn’t be more ridiculous, Taylor Swift’s Patient Zero entered the chat the day after Episode 7 dropped. We’re talking about the strange validation that can come from realizing another woman experienced the same patterns you did, why healing doesn’t mean you’ll never be triggered again, and the difference between living in suspicion and learning to trust yourself.

You don’t have to hate the version of yourself who stayed. You can understand her, learn from her, and make sure she never has to abandon herself like that again.

Have you ever been in a relationship and suddenly realized… I don’t even recognize who I am right now?

In this episode of The Middle Seat, I’m telling a story I’ve barely talked about—including pieces of it that some of the people closest to me have never heard.

What started as a promising relationship slowly turned me into someone who was constantly checking her phone, watching social media, needing reassurance, replaying conversations, and physically feeling the anxiety every time something changed.

And the hardest part? I knew that wasn’t me.

We’re talking about the confusing moments I explained away, the things I let slide, the difference between intuition and having actual proof, and what happened when all those little things that never quite made sense finally started connecting.

This isn’t a story about how to catch someone in a lie.

It’s about what can happen when you spend so much time trying to understand someone else that you stop paying attention to what the relationship is doing to you.

Because sometimes the biggest sign that something isn’t right isn’t what they’re doing.

It’s realizing you don’t recognize the person you’re becoming.

When you’re single, sometimes it feels like if you want something to be celebrated… you’re also the one who has to plan the celebration.

In this episode of The Middle Seat, we’re talking about something that goes beyond loneliness: what it feels like to want your life to be considered.

Birthdays. Career changes. Accomplishments. Hard seasons. Holidays. The moments that matter even when there isn’t a partner automatically standing beside you thinking, We should celebrate this.

As I get ready to turn 38, I’m sharing why birthdays have brought up some complicated feelings for me, the difference between people loving you and people actively thinking of you, and why a group of women planning to celebrate me in Tampa this year has meant so much more than they probably realize.

I thought my life would look different at 38. I thought I’d have my person by now.

I don’t.

But I’m also incredibly proud of the woman—and the life—I’ve built along the way.

And this year, I’m giving myself a pretty big birthday present: The Middle Seat.

Because single people’s lives aren’t waiting to begin when they find a relationship.

Our lives are happening right now. And they’re worth celebrating, too. 🤍

Apparently, knowing what you want in a relationship means you’re “too picky.” At least according to some people.

In this episode of The Middle Seat, I’m unpacking the difference between having standards and having an impossible checklist—and why I’ve stopped apologizing for wanting emotional availability, communication, consistency, attraction, ambition, affection, and a partner who actually wants to build a life alongside me.

For a long time, I was really good at being understanding. I adjusted. I stayed flexible. I gave grace. I made myself smaller. And sometimes I bent so far trying to make a relationship work that I completely forgot to ask whether it was actually working for me.

I spent a lot of my life wanting to be chosen.

Now I’m finally asking a different question: Am I choosing you?

Maybe the bar didn’t get too high. Maybe I just stopped lowering it every time I really wanted something to work.

I thought healing worked like this: you go through heartbreak, spend time alone, learn your patterns, raise your standards… and then when you finally decide to date again, you magically make better choices.

Turns out, healing does not give you psychic abilities.

In this episode of The Middle Seat, I’m talking about the year I spent genuinely learning how to love my life on my own—from concerts and friendships to traveling to Europe, seeing Taylor Swift, getting another dog (because obviously), and becoming a version of myself I hadn’t really known before.

Eventually, the thought of dating again stopped making me want to literally throw up. So naturally, I downloaded Hinge.

We’re talking terrible prompts, familiar faces, higher standards, what “being ready” actually looked like for me—and the Hinge match that made me think maybe there was something worth exploring.

Because healing doesn’t mean you’ll never choose the wrong person again. It just changes the way you move through what happens next.

You can genuinely love the life you’ve built and still feel really lonely sometimes. Both things can be true.

In this episode of The Middle Seat, we’re talking about the side of single life that doesn’t always make it onto social media, the quiet nights, always being the independent one, navigating friendships when everyone else’s lives look different, and what it feels like when your time is treated as a little more flexible simply because you don’t have a partner or kids.

And no, this isn’t a “poor single girl” episode. I love my life. I’m proud of the life I’ve built. I would choose a quiet house over feeling lonely next to the wrong person every single time.

But wanting partnership doesn’t make you ungrateful for the life you already have.

So whether you’re the single friend—or you love someone who is—this one’s for you. 🤍