The Millennial Sandwich

Season 1 of The Millennial Sandwich is officially wrapped! 

From the first episode we recorded (which, spoiler alert, has still never been released) to this season 1 recap, we've learned so much, felt so seen, and found ourselves asking..."is this a podcast or a therapy session" over and over again.

In this episode, we talk about what we took away from our first season, what you can expect from us down the line, and what we hope to deliver in our second season. But most of all, we just...talk. 

We get into:

-Why millennials need to be called out for their nostalgia obsession

-How tradwife/girlboss binaries don't serve anyone

-Why "working mom" isn't an accurate or inclusive label

-The guests and episodes that surprised us most

-Why it's Taylor Swift's world (we're just living in it)

What do you want to hear more of next season? Leave us a voice note! https://www.speakpipe.com/themillennialsandwich

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Naaz Nichols is Care.com's Chief Customer Experience Officer. She's also a sandwich generation caregiver — and that lived experience gives her the tools to fully understand what other caregivers truly need.

In this episode, Naaz joins us to share the details of Care.com's first ever Sandwich Generation Report. She shares a statistic that may shock you.

Naaz also gets deeply personal about her own experiences with sandwich generation caregiving.

We discuss:

• How real-life caregiving makes you better at your job (even if your job doesn't involve serving caregivers)
• What it's really like to parent and care for aging parents under one roof
• Why Naaz took a career pause (and came back to the workforce with an even richer professional perspective)
• How perfectionism isn't sustainable for sandwich generation caregivers
• What it really feels like to navigate the medical system as your parents age

Topics covered:

Caregiving, career, career pause, Lewy body dementia, Alzheimer's disease, care policy, caregiver burnout

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If you're a millennial, there's a good chance you've noticed some changes in how your parents function. Maybe they're moving differently, or they're repeating themselves more, or they're simply just...not as confident as they used to be.

But if you're in the sandwich generation, noticing those changes in how your parents behave is especially complicated — because while you want to stay on top of those changes, you're so busy raising your kids, you barely have time to consider what they could mean. 

Co-host Dr. Anita Chandra, a geriatrician and expert in aging weighs in on 

-Those signs of aging and what people can do when they notice them

-The difference between normal aging and a sign something may be amiss

-Why we need to change our cultural perceptions of "old people"

-What it truly means to "age well"

-What our cultural obsession with independence is really doing to older adults

-How adult children can care for their parents from a distance

Topics covered: 

Aging, longevity, The Golden Bachelor, midlife, middle age, millennials, baby boomers, the sandwich generation, caregiving, long-distance caregiving

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Personally and professionally, Hitha Palepu wears a lot of hats. She's a mother of boys (but not a boy mom), a daughter of immigrants, and only child, a pharma CEO, a content creator, an author, a speaker...and that's not even an exhuastive list.

It's easy to look at someone like Hitha and wonder how she does it all. But here's the thing: She doesn't. 

Hitha talks us through how she makes her multi-hyphanted life work...and also, what she doesn't do. Because doing a lot is not the same as doing it all.

We discuss:

-The pressures daughters of immigrants face

-The systems that help her streamline her personal and professional commitments

-Why taking care of herself is so important

-How watching reality TV is cultural anthropology

Topics covered:

Aging parents, caregiving, sandwich generation, motherhood, reality TV, Love Island, boy mom culture, immigrant parents, south asian daughters

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Care work has value, economically and beyond — yet both our systems and our culture refuse to acknowledge this. 

Nobody understands this deep devaluation better than Elissa Strauss, who (literally) wrote the book (When You Care) on the true value of care. 

In this episode, Elissa, Anita & Zara discuss:

• The longheld idea that motherhood shouldn't "take over" your identity
• The interdependency of policy and culture where caregiving is concerned
• The biggest misconceptions people have about care work
• Our cultural obsession with independence and preservation of youth
• The caregiving secrets many of us keep
• How tradwife and girlboss narratives fail caregivers

Topics covered: Caregiving, care work, dementia care, motherhood, economic value of care, gender, feminism, wage gap

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Millennials are preparing for their midlife era...and it's bringing up a lot of questions. 

For example...

• Does every generation feel this way at this age?
• Why do we feel so much younger *and* so much older than we actually are?
• What do I actually want to be when I grow up?
• I've done all the things I set out to do. Now what?
• And, perhaps most importantly...do women even get to have a midlife crisis?

Anita and Zara are getting into all of it...and exploring the wild identity shift that comes when you're 40-ish. Women in midlife are almost always denied main character treatment, but we're here to change that. 

Caregiving (for both our kids and our parents) complicates our ability to fall apart in midlife. We don't really have a roadmap for what a midlife crisis actually looks like in a woman, but we're setting the stage for what may come.

Key topics: Millennial midlife, middle aged millennials, pop culture, gender, marriage, aging, beauty, career, success, ambition

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Jessica C. Guthrie was your typical ambitious millennial. She had it all figured out: The big dreams, the Ivy League education, the clear path to the top. And then, when Jessica was 26, her mom's Alzheimer's Disease diagnosis changed the plan.

In this episode, Jessica, a caregiving advocate and consultant, joins Anita and Zara to talk about the realities of being a young caregiver.  

They cover:

• How Jessica realized it was time to go from long-distance caregiver to in-person caregiver
• What the medical community ought to understand about patient and caregiver experiences
• The effect becoming a caregiver has had on her friendships
• What it's truly like to be a woman of color in the caregiving community
• How her mother's constant presence shaped the way Jessica cares

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to Jessica Guthrie's caregiving journey
01:03 Jessica's background and her mother's diagnosis
03:01 Evolving caregiving roles and routines
05:26 Physical dependence and hands-on care
07:50 Misconceptions about dementia progression
08:33 Clues and tools for long-distance caregiving
11:51 Advocating for diagnosis and early intervention
13:45 Communication and trust with healthcare providers
17:09 Reevaluating life goals and caregiving impact
20:16 The power of presence and relationship
22:49 Navigating racial disparities in healthcare
26:34 The importance of community and support networks
30:03 Language, culture, and underrepresentation in caregiving
34:21 Addressing stigma and biases in dementia care
37:45 What doctors often overlook in dementia diagnosis
43:22 The need for diverse voices in healthcare conversations
45:12 Stories of bias and misdiagnosis
48:49 Advice for caregivers and self-care tips
54:54 The importance of community affirmations
55:31 Millennial caregiving survival tips
56:39 Jessica's message of hope and community support

Topics covered: Caregiving, Alzheimer's, mental health, caregiving tips, Black caregivers, family support, dementia, long-distance caregiving, caregiver advocacy

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Grief doesn't always follow the five stages that have become a fixture in cultural conversations about loss. The reality? Grief can show up in a costume...and it doesn't always begin when someone dies.

Claire Bidwell Smith, therapist, author, and grief expert joins Anita and Zara for a conversation about the elements of grief we rarely discuss. It's a perspective-shifting conversation that may help you recognize surprising ways grief has presented in your own life.

Chapters:

00:00 Introduction to Grief and Loss
02:54 The Shift in Grief Conversations
05:45 The Loneliness of Grief
08:34 Grief and Anxiety Connection
11:18 Navigating Grief as a Parent
14:00 Understanding Anticipatory Grief
16:46 The Impact of Grief on Millennials
19:40 Coping Strategies for Grief
22:30 Anticipatory Grief in Daily Life
25:16 Emotional Distance and Grief
28:35 Navigating Anticipatory Grief
31:43 Understanding Grief Beyond Loss
36:09 The Impact of Grief on Relationships
39:46 The Individual Nature of Grief
44:38 Finding Positivity in Grief
50:28 Coping as an Only Child
51:34 Self-Compassion in the Sandwich Generation

Topics covered: Grief, anticipatory grief, losing a parent, grieving as a child, supporting a grieving child, grief community, grief influencers, grief coach, aging parents

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One of the hallmarks of millennial parenting? Knowing so much (maybe...too much?) about raising kids, yet constantly feeling undermined by the people who raised you. 

Even the experts are experiencing this. See: Dr. Mona Amin, a pediatrician, content creator and podcaster who shares parenting advice with over 2 million followers across Instagram and TikTok, yet has stumbled through the complexities of maintaining intergenerational harmony in her own family.

In this episode, Dr. Mona speaks to Anita and Zara about:

• How to react when you hear your parents criticize your parenting
• Why boys are just as vulnerable as girls when it comes to body-shaming
• The importance of individualizing your approach to parenting each of your children
• Why parenting advice and content has become so extreme
• Her honest take on gentle parenting

It's an informative, relatable, and incredibly honest conversation about how millennial parents can maintain close — yet often imperfect — relationships with their parents...and undo some of the patterns that hurt them as children.

Chapters:

00:00 Introduction to Dr. Mona Amin and her background
02:36 Parenting advice in the age of social media
03:29 The impact of information overload on parents
04:55 Balancing social media, family, and personal bandwidth
06:27 How being a pediatrician influences parenting
08:52 Perfectionism versus intentional parenting
10:32 The importance of understanding your child's unique needs
11:51 Navigating parenting advice and scripts
15:08 Discipline, boundaries, and family dynamics
19:38 Handling intergenerational trauma and boundaries
23:46 Dealing with societal comments and body positivity
28:33 Supporting children through societal and peer comments
31:11 Gender norms and societal expectations for boys and girls
34:08 Managing emotional reactions and communication styles
37:55 The ongoing nature of parent-child relationships across ages
38:44 Cultural Perspectives on Parenting
39:10 Shifts in Parenting Conversations
48:59 Navigating Parenting Styles
53:47 The Importance of Connection and Communication

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As a content creator and author of Honest Motherhood: Losing My Mind and Finding Myself, Libby Ward built her platform on radical honesty. In this conversation, she delivers just that. Come for Libby's story, which includes a lifetime of caregiving responsibility, and stay for Libby's sharp, unfiltered opinions about the state of motherhood today.

Libby speaks to Anita and Zara about:

• How being a caregiver as a child affected her in motherhood
• Why so many mothers feel invisible after giving birth
• What it's really like to break cycles in parenthood
• How she realized selflessness shouldn't be viewed as a badge of honor in motherhood
• Why ragebait content is so viral (and so dangerous)
• And so much more

Chapters

00:00
Introduction to Libby Ward and Her Journey

02:00
The Reality of Motherhood vs. Expectations

09:53
Breaking Cycles of Parenting

14:45
Navigating Caregiving Responsibilities

18:36
The Impact of Online Content on Motherhood

23:53
Positive Motherhood Content isn't Actually Positive

26:36
The Struggles of Modern Motherhood

29:58
Content Creation and Its Impact on Caregiving

34:13
The Gender Gap in Content Consumption

37:22
Navigating Relationships and Boundaries

41:43
The Illusion of Adulthood and Self-Trust

44:02
Radical Honesty as a Survival Tool

Send us Fan Mail

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Leave us a voice note! We'd love to hear from you: https://www.speakpipe.com/themillennialsandwich