The Mystic Midwife: Portal of Love

A joke. A missed moment. A tension that opened into a portal.

In this episode, I share the story of a simple conversation with my husband that became something far deeper, a breaking point, a remembering, a roar that shattered an old spell of suppression. What began as a small misunderstanding unearthed much older wounds: the fear of being too much, the grief of not being met, the guilt of having needs, and the lifelong habit of shrinking to keep the peace.

This is an episode about shadow work, nervous system healing, feminine expression, emotional triggers, self-honoring, and the sacred moment when your voice stops asking for permission to exist.

We walk through:
❤️‍🔥how a small moment can activate ancient pain
❤️‍🔥the wound of suppression, rejection, guilt, and control
❤️‍🔥why the feminine voice is not always soft
❤️‍🔥how shadows are not here to destroy us, but reveal us
❤️‍🔥the link between the body, the heart, trauma, and truth
❤️‍🔥frequency, ego, surrender, and the path back to the soul
❤️‍🔥what it means to stop abandoning yourself in the middle of pain
❤️‍🔥how healing begins when you stay with what rises instead of silencing it

This episode is for anyone moving through shadow work, spiritual awakening, nervous system dysregulation, trauma healing, relationship triggers, feminine embodiment, and the long return to wholeness.

If you have ever felt too loud, too emotional, too sensitive, too much, this conversation is a reminder: your truth does not need permission to exist. The roar may not be pretty. But sometimes it is the sound of liberation

Vibration is the sixth element. Fire dissolves. Water carries. Wind moves. Earth buries. But vibration transforms. In this episode, I walk you through the living edge where healing becomes a frequency shift, the moment the body stops bracing and the soul starts moving again.
You will meet the Lioness and the Mother inside you. The part that knows how to soften, and the part that knows how to hold the line with love. We talk about discernment over force, boundaries without anger, and the sacred truth that you can be tender without becoming small, and powerful without becoming cruel.
We also enter the mirror that stings: the pattern of half-invitations, guilt-laced disclaimers, and the quiet way self-protection makes us unclear. If you have ever said “no pressure” while secretly aching to be chosen, this is your medicine. Here, love does not require dilution. It requires presence, clarity, and the courage to say: I want you here.
This is trauma healing, nervous system healing, and relationship healing, told through the altar of real life. Softness, steel, and a rebirth that comes after you finally let yourself feel it all.

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/...

New Episodes Release Tuesday Nights at 8PM

Stan Store (courses, The Red Tent support group, 1:1 sessions with The MysticMidwife): https://stan.store/PlantMedici...

What if the way back to love isn’t grand gestures… but a real conversation?

In this episode, I ask my husband a simple question: “What makes you feel most loved?” I expect the usual answers; touch, time, acts of service. Instead, he names something deeper: repair, understanding, and staying in the conversation until we truly feel one another.

From that one answer, I unfold the heart of union love, the kind that doesn’t perform, doesn’t keep score, and doesn’t demand perfection to stay. We explore why understanding is the bridge that dissolves distance, and how vulnerability becomes strength when you stop wearing armor in the place you most want to be held.

If you’ve been craving emotional intimacy, honest communication, and a love that feels safe enough to tell the truth inside… this is for you.
In this episode, we move through:
What “feeling loved” can actually mean (beyond the checklist)
Why understanding changes everything
How to stay present during hard conversations
Vulnerability as holiness: truth without armor
Union love: acceptance in the mess and the masterpiece

What if the way back to love isn’t grand gestures… but a real conversation?

In this episode, I ask my husband a simple question: “What makes you feel most loved?” I expect the usual answers; touch, time, acts of service. Instead, he names something deeper: repair, understanding, and staying in the conversation until we truly feel one another.

From that one answer, I unfold the heart of union love, the kind that doesn’t perform, doesn’t keep score, and doesn’t demand perfection to stay. We explore why understanding is the bridge that dissolves distance, and how vulnerability becomes strength when you stop wearing armor in the place you most want to be held.

If you’ve been craving emotional intimacy, honest communication, and a love that feels safe enough to tell the truth inside… this is for you.
In this episode, we move through:
What “feeling loved” can actually mean (beyond the checklist)
Why understanding changes everything
How to stay present during hard conversations
Vulnerability as holiness: truth without armor
Union love: acceptance in the mess and the masterpiece

What if your triggers aren’t proof you’re failing… but proof you’re waking up?

In this episode, "The Heart as Oracle: Turning Triggers Into Alignment, Truth, and Soft Power, ” I walk through the sacred, uncomfortable places where transformation actually happens: the urge to control, the reflex to rush, the old pattern of shrinking to stay safe, and the quiet grief of losing myself one small choice at a time. You’ll hear how alignment isn’t a vibe, it’s integrity: when what you do, say, think, and believe finally stand in the same place. We explore why control can masquerade as comfort, how impatience reveals the nervous system’s ancient alarms, and how other people’s “limitations” can become mirrors and medicine instead of threats.

I share the tenderness of the moment I expected abandonment, but was met with presence. Not perfect understanding. Just staying. And how that one moment can rewrite a lifetime of fear.
This is for the woman who is exhausted from performing, tired of over-explaining, and ready to stop abandoning herself to earn love. We move through:
Triggers as portals back to truth
Self-abandonment patterns and the cost of disappearing
The wild woman returning from exile
The heart as oracle a quiet compass that never forgot you
A simple heart-listening practice you can do right now
The rebirth of “Mother… and Woman,” where you become the one who mothers you.

If you’ve been living in survival mode, if your body tightens when life slows down, if you’re ready to choose softness without losing your power, this episode is your invitation.

nervous system healing, trauma recovery, shadow work, emotional regulation, self abandonment, boundaries, control, healing journey, spiritual awakening, being seen, inner child healing, feminine embodiment, manifestation through alignment.

Spotify link: https://open.spotify.com/show/...

New Episodes Release Tuesday Nights at 8PM

Stan Store (courses, The Red Tent support group, 1:1 sessions with The MysticMidwife): https://stan.store/PlantMedici...

In Season 1, Episode 5 of The Portal of Love, I finish Chapter 2: The Mirror of Wounds, where the body remembers what the mind tried to bury. A burn-like mark appears on my thigh like a holy flare: not punishment, but a signal. A threshold. A quiet enough rising to the surface. From there, we enter the tender paradox of relationship triggers: how my daughter’s unapologetic voice stirs awe and grief in me, and reveals the early wound that taught me my truth was dangerous. I write a letter to the wound of suppression, thank it for trying to keep me safe, and release it from the role of narrator.

Then we move through The Portal of the Heart, the place where abandonment, rejection, and people-pleasing melt under honest breath. I share the moment I spoke my truth and survived it… and how that survival became a new kind of freedom.

This episode is for the one who has edited herself into silence. For the one who’s been called “too much.” For the one who is ready to stop abandoning herself, reclaim her voice, and let the wound become the doorway.
Themes: nervous system healing, emotional triggers, shadow work, self-trust, boundaries, suppression, abandonment wounds, people-pleasing, spiritual awakening, wholeness, and the courage to become.

If this episode meets you: share it with the woman who’s been swallowing her truthand leave a review so the right souls can find the doorway.

For deeper vulnerability and private transmissions, step into the Vault and The Red Tent in my Stan Store.

Spotify link: https://open.spotify.com/show/...

New Episodes Release Tuesday Nights at 8PM

Stan Store (courses, The Red Tent support group, 1:1 sessions with The MysticMidwife): https://stan.store/PlantMedici...

When the triggers disappear, it can feel like proof that you’ve finally healed. But what if the silence is just the eye of the storm?

In this episode, The Bypass, Jess | The Mystic Midwife shares the truth most “healing” spaces don’t name: how spiritual bypass can masquerade as peace, and how real intimacy can re-awaken the wounds we thought were gone. Through her own story of leaving a narcissistic relationship, floating in the high of liberation, then meeting a husband who became an unexpected mirror, she walks you into the middle place, where rejection, abandonment, suppression, and “too muchness” finally surface to be healed, not outrun.

We move through twelve core wounds (rejection after vulnerability, not being chosen, scarcity, powerlessness, sexual shame, emotional isolation, and more) and reframe them as doorways instead of life sentences. You’ll hear new truths for each wound, “My voice is medicine,” “My pleasure is holy,” “I belong to myself,” and a simple somatic practice to stay with your body instead of abandoning yourself when triggers rise again.

If you’ve ever thought, “I was fine until I opened my heart again,” this episode is for you. This is the medicine of the mirror: allowing another’s discomfort without making it your cage, staying anchored in your own truth while the old stories burn off. You are not going backwards. You are going deeper.

🎥 TikTok:
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🎧 Listen on Spotify:
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🕯️ New Episodes Release Tuesday Nights at 8PM CST

🌹 Stan Store (courses, The Red Tent support group, 1:1 sessions with The Mystic Midwife):
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#spiritualbypass #traumahealing #shadowwork #innerchildhealing #attachmentwounds #relationshiphealing #nervoussystemhealing #mirrorwork #plantmedicinehealing #divinefeminine #soulalchemy #rebirth #healingjourney #cptsdrecovery #mysticmidwife #podcast

Your wound is not your fault. Your healing is your responsibility.

In Chapter 2 of The Portal of Love, “The Mirror of Wounds,” Jess, The Mystic Midwife, reads from her unpublished manuscript about the invisible wounds that shape our whole lives: childhood trauma, self-abandonment, people-pleasing, and the ancient lie that we are “too much.”

This episode is for the ones who learned to survive by shrinking:

The woman who stopped planning trips, stopped craving her favorite foods out loud, stopped asking for help.

The girl inside who decided it was safer to be small, quiet, and pleasing than to risk being “too much.”

The soul who feels like she is drowning in sadness with no obvious reason, only a bone-deep ache.


Inside this chapter, we explore:

How tiny everyday moments: spilled water, a sigh, a joke at your expense, reopen old wounds of shame and unworthiness.

The thousand subtle ways we lose ourselves to stay safe in love, family, and community.

The myth of “too much” and how it trains us to abandon our own needs, fire, and desire.

Pre-verbal wounds that live in the body and nervous system long before language.

A plant medicine ceremony vision of the infant self and the decision to finally be the one who stays.

The shift from “What’s wrong with me?” to “Of course I hurt, now I choose me.”


This is a tender, honest chapter on healing childhood wounds, inner child grief, and nervous-system level trauma, without bypassing the pain. The mirror of the wound doesn’t just reflect what broke you; it reflects the power that survived, the breath beneath the story, the part of you that refuses to disappear.

If you’ve ever felt abandoned when you asked for support, mocked for needing rest, or labeled “too sensitive,” this episode is a love letter and a lantern. Come sit in the mirror with me and remember: you are not too much; you are the ocean in a world terrified of tides.

Listen, share with a friend who’s healing, and let this chapter be a gentle turning point back toward yourself.

• Spotify link: https://open.spotify.com/show/...
New Episodes Release Tuesday Nights at 8PM

• Stan Store (courses, The Red Tent support group, 1:1 sessions with The MysticMidwife): https://stan.store/PlantMedici...



#traumahealing
#innerchildhealing
#shadowwork
#nervoussystemhealing
#healingjourney
#spiritualawakening
#selfabandonment
#highlysensitivewoman
#plantmedicinehealing
#MirrorisMedicine

When life strips you to the bone, what remains? In this intimate transmission, Jess, the Mystic Midwife, walks through loss, illness, and the sacred burning that reveals the self beneath the rubble. This is a love letter to the parts you thought were broken, a mirror for anyone mid-awakening, and a gentle rite of passage from martyrdom to sovereignty.

Inside, we explore shadow work, trauma healing, nervous-system regulation, spiritual rebirth, and plant-medicine devotion, told through lived scenes: “What We Lose,” “Beneath the Rubble,” “To My Wounds,” “Soul Pull,” “My Own Funeral,” and the discipline of preparation when the call won’t let you rest. You’ll hear about sacred anger as the body’s holy no, the tenderness of being witnessed, and the moment you choose truth over performance.

You’ll hear about:

Fire as a midwife: grief → rebirth; why you are not what you lose, you are what you carry within

Welcoming exiled parts (inner child, silenced voice) without shame, trauma-informed, dignity-first

The pull of the heart vs. comfort: choosing self without abandoning love

Laying the good-girl/martyr to rest and rising as sovereign, soft, and unshakeable

Nervous-system practices for big feelings (sacred heat, somatic release, sunlight & swing-set medicine)

Devotion and pre-dieta discipline as preparation, not performance


Try this from the episode:

Mirror Ritual: Look into your eyes. Say, “I see you. I choose you. I will not abandon you.”

Journal Prompt: What is the oldest wound I can remember, and how has it authored my self-story?

Embodiment: One hand to heart, one to belly. Breathe: “I am safe. I am loved. I am home.”


If this landed, share it with a sister, leave a review, and step deeper into the work with me.

New Episodes Release Tuesday Nights at 8PM

Podcast (Spotify): https://open.spotify.com/show/...

Stan Store (courses, The Red Tent support group, 1:1 sessions with The MysticMidwife): https://stan.store/PlantMedici...

Before the rising, there is the burning. This raw episode is a field note from my messy unbecoming: blood, bone, and breath. I name the years of pretending to be the picture-perfect wife and mother, the intrusive chorus of “be better, do more,” and the day I burned on a bathroom floor and heard the first clean whisper: You will rise. I trace the quiet betrayals that lit the match, the illusion of control I clung to after the tornado, and the moment surrender became medicine, not weakness. We close with breath. If the fire has found you, you’re not late, you’re ready. Let it burn. You will rise.


Education only; not medical, legal, or crisis advice.

spiritual awakening, dark night of the soul, shadow work, surrender, letting go of control, trauma healing, nervous system regulation, feminine embodiment, rebirth, unbecoming, bathroom floor moment, tornado recovery, resilience, breathwork, sovereignty.