For this 250th episode of the podcast we’re taking a look at the state of modern fatherhood. First we’re talking to stand-up comedian, writer and political activist Charlie Demers. He’s one of dozens of notable Canadians who, through interviews, have contributed to a great new book of essays called 40 Fathers: Men Talk About Parenting. The book was written by family counsellor and writer Tessa Lloyd, who joins us in the second part of this episode to talk about what compelled her to gather the points of view of dads at this particular time.

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Today we welcome Vanessa Vakharia back to the show. Vanessa is the founder of a unique tutoring facility called The Math Guru here in Toronto. She’s a teacher with a Bachelor of Commerce, a Masters in Mathematics Education and the author of a great math workbook for kids called Math Hacks: Cool Tips + Less Stress = Better Marks. She’s been on before to discuss topics like encouraging girls to pursue STEM careers, but this time she’s here to talk “Math Therapy,” her new podcast where she works through a guest’s math trauma every week so that they can start living their best lives. I reveal a little of my own math-related mindset issues, and she talks to us about how we can ensure our kids don’t inherit a legacy of struggles with math.

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For this episode we speak to child psychologist Dr. Vanessa LaPointe. Vanessa is the author of two books, including her latest Parenting Right From the Start: Laying a Healthy Foundation in the Baby and Toddler Years. But this episode is not about the baby and toddler years. It’s about the investigation into ourselves that Dr. LaPointe argues is so necessary in order to parent the way we want to. She explains how we can work through issues from the past that inevitably have an effect on how we respond to the challenges and demands of raising our own kids.

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With this episode we’re continuing our exploration into the lives of families affected by incarceration. I’m joined by Andrea Page, the founder of FitMom, one of the first providers of pre- and post-natal fitness classes in the Greater Toronto Area, and an outspoken advocate on issues like postpartum depression and mental health in general. Andrea’s eldest child has struggled for years with his mental health and unfortunately found himself on the wrong side of the law, and is currently serving a six-year prison sentence. Andrea and I are going to talk about the connections between poor mental health, trauma and incarceration, and what it’ll take to break the cycle that connects trauma to crime.

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This week begins our foray into the lives of families affected by incarceration. It’s not an easy subject, but it’s one that affects many Canadian families and an even more in the United States, where one in 28 children has a parent who is incarcerated. My first guest on this topic is Rachel Mascarenas Ford. Rachel lives in North Carolina with her son, daughter and husband, Mark, who returned in April 2018 from five years in a minimum-security federal prison known as a camp. She shares about how her husband came to be in trouble with the law and the night that turned their lives upside down. We also talk about how they managed as a family while he was away, how little resources there are to support families of the incarcerated, and what it’s been like adjusting to his return.

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We’re joined this week by Dr. Marika Lindholm, a sociologist and advocate for the diverse group of women raising kids solo. She’s the co-editor of a new anthology about solo moms. It’s called We Got This: Solo Mom Stories of Grit, Heart and Humor. She and I talk a little bit about her own journey to single motherhood, how it led her to found a social platform called Empowering Solo Moms Everywhere (ESME), and what it’ll take to make the path a little easier for moms raising kids on their own today and in the future.

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This week we welcome Jeffrey Marsh to the show. Jeffrey is one of the world's foremost commentators on non-binary identity and activism. They rose to prominence with inspirational viral videos, first shared on Vine and now on Twitter and Instagram. Jeffrey is both the first non-binary activist and spokesperson to appear on national television in the U.S., and also the author of a book called How to Be You. CBS once called them “the internet’s most beloved anti-bully.” They’ve also got a wonderful TedX Talk called “I'm a genderfluid activist. Here's how I fight back.” Jeffrey shares about growing up queer in a conservative, rural environment and how that shaped the work they do speaking to schools and drawing attention to the mental health crisis faced by trans, non-binary and genderfluid youth.

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We’re back to exploring family in its many with this episode, where we’re joined by Emily McGranachan, who tells us about growing up with two moms. Emily’s professional life has also been shaped by her upbringing. She’s director of family engagement for the Family Equality Council, the national organization in the U.S. dedicated to the equality of LGBTQ people and their families, as well as those who wish to form families. And she’s the host of the Council’s great podcast, Outspoken Voices.

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We’re continuing our exploration of what it’ll take to make parenting more sustainable, this week with a focus on how critical it is to cultivate community and share our stories. I’m delighted to welcome Kerrie Lee Brown back to the show. Kerrie first came on the podcast way back on episode 108, when she shared the story of how it took having a heart attack to get her to slow down. That was also the subject of her book, My Heart, My Self: A heartfelt guide for women who do too much. Kerrie has launched a storytelling platform called Red Lily to bring women together to lift each other up. Kerrie and I are going to talk about some of the isolation parents go through at different stages of parenting and why it’s so vital we come together to share the good, bad and seriously ugly.

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Start asking around groups of parents, perhaps especially moms, and increasingly it seems we’re hanging on by a thread. With competing demands of work and family, we’re often hovering on the edge of burnout, if not totally fried all ready. Today I chat with Natalie Ruskin, a journalist-turned-professional-coach who has a business called The MoMentum helping high-achieving moms, many of whom find themselves in periods of struggle while trying to keep up. Natalie joins me for a deep dive into burnout, why it happens and how we can use it as a catalyst for change.

Show Notes

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