Welcome to The Nonlinear Library, where we use Text-to-Speech software to convert the best writing from the Rationalist and EA communities into audio. This is: Soft skills for meetups, published by mingyuan on September 27, 2022 on LessWrong.
This post is adapted from a memo I wrote for the 2022 global meetup organizer retreat, and owes some of its content to the organizers who attended.
'Soft skills' is a broad and somewhat fuzzy term, but the OED defines it as "personal attributes that enable someone to interact effectively and harmoniously with other people", and that seems close enough to me. Being able to interact effectively and harmoniously with other people is obviously an important part of running a community, and it can be hard to work on, especially because everyone is starting out with very different strengths and weaknesses.
The most important thing I have to say about this topic is:
If there's something that you don't know how to do, acknowledge that and find a way to work around it, rather than ignoring it / pretending it's not a problem.
For example, a lot of 'soft skills' involve reading non-verbal cues. If this is hard for you, maybe you can work on it, but in the meantime, you still need to be aware of conflicts, tension, and discontentment in your community.
One way to solve this would be to enlist a trusted friend / member of your community who's better at reading people, and make it their job to notice potential problems and bring them to your attention. This way you can still address problems despite your trouble with non-verbal cues. Similarly, if you find it hard to talk to people or ask people for things, you might have a friend do the actual talking in your stead.
Welcoming new members
Engage with first-time attendees
When a new person shows up, speak to them (ask their name, etc) and help them get oriented. Ask if they have any questions, and set expectations for what's going to happen at this event. You might also ask them what brought them there, what they're hoping to get out of it, etc, but just conversing at all is good. When you inevitably have to leave them, make sure you've introduced them into another conversation, rather than just leaving them alone.
Note: This doesn't necessarily just apply to in-person events! The Miami ACX organizer DMs every new person who joins his Facebook group.
Appoint Welcomers
A Welcomer is someone whose job it is to attend to the experience of new members, as described above. By default you as the organizer are in this role, but if your community is large, or if you struggle with shyness or awkwardness, you can delegate it to one or more other people. (If you're lucky, you may have enough people naturally filling this role that you don't need to appoint anyone.)
Recognize that, if you take on the role of Welcomer, you need to be attending to it constantly. I've seen large-ish public events where the organizers just got absorbed in conversations and no one took responsibility for welcoming. New people who showed up would just stand around looking lost :(
Make points of contact legible
If you're gathering in a large group, the Welcomer(s) or organizer(s) should be visually identifiable, so that anyone in the crowd can find someone to help if they need something. This is the reason why events often give their volunteers brightly-colored T-shirts.
Examples:
At a 100+ person meetup in NYC, one of the organizers made a tall flag that he carried around so he would always be findable despite moving.
If meeting somewhere with only one entrance, you can have a Welcomer stationed at the door.
The East Bay organizer always announces beforehand to look for his distinctive hat, so when people show up for the first time they not only know they're in the right place but also have a default person to talk to.
Retaining members
In order to retain people, you need to give them reasons to stay! Here are some ways you might do that:
Make your events pleasant to go to
This is the ...