- the inversion that appears as grandiosity and confidence

- what the inner critic actually is

- sadistic super-ego- the grandiosity gap

- the defense cascade (3 parts)

- why therapy is difficult

why dropping the mask doesn't work

- the origin story, object relations and Winnicott

- why the false self is impenetrable

- cold therapy and co-independence

- therapy vs. structure

- The question: if the narcissist can change is the wrong question- why healing and 'behavior modification' are completely different

- what clinical profile is needed for "healing"

- there are two

- Do the inside and outside connect in Cluster B

- the longitudinal BPD research

- and why it's a misnomer

- 3 mechanisms that keep internal and external development locked apart

- the 3 outcomes of intervention so you don't waste time

- the corrective relationship structures OLNE offers

Healing Narcissism Episode 1: Why They Can't See It

- Why the Narcissist cannot see themselves

- even when they try

- What the 'False Self' is

- The 2 categories they sort things in

- Why self-help doesn't work on narcissists

- What is narcissistic mortification

- How the pillar of OLNE works on narcissism

- What change actually requires - beyond surface level

- 3 things that look like "change" to watch out for

- cluster b personalities: how they outsource regulation

- symptom reduction vs. behavioral change, the truth

- covert narcissists; can they change

- what to look for so you don't waste years of your life

- change your question to this

- why stability feel like death to a narcissist

- narcissist "snapshot" theory

- why boundaries feel like attack

- how they use sex as anxiety medication

- how the false self "mummifies" the true self

- why narcissists can't see your disappearance

- the pathological shared fantasy

- how to tell the difference between histrionic, narcissist, and psychopath in bed

- why they look identical- the emotional temperature test

- what "I love you" means to each one

- what sociosexuality means for each

- three voices that live in one person

- the robotic doll test- the "don't ask, don't tell" idea

- what is paranoid ideation

- two strands of paranoia

- the false self enemy

- twin anxieties

- the persecutory object

- the 5 behavioral outcomes of paranoid ideation

- projective identification

- narcissistic mirroring

- what happens

• Why sex is a map of the whole personality

• Why the paranoid partner can't stay present in bed

• Three Cluster B types look identical - one is cold

• Why "I love you" and "you're a prop" come from same person

• The false self: the wall that kills intimacy

• They use sex like a sedative• Warmth vs. emptiness -how to tell them apart

- why you feel worse or hollow after no-contact

- a different kind of grief

- identity from grievance

- why an internalized abusive voice sounds like you

- how to integrate the idea of "co-independence"

- why the family member hoovers

- what the finishing line actually is