The Parent Rap

In this episode, we talk about art and creativity for both kids and adults, and how sometimes we discount our own creativity because it doesn’t “look right” when we do it. Somewhat unexpectedly, we explore the ways we ourselves are creative and how those creative endeavors have colored the way Chips’ and Beans’ creativity is developing alongside and apart from our own. Plus: some Big Feelings about the things people have created throughout history and how we are all connected through our art (awww).

In this episode, a subject very dear to Anna’s heart: birth stories and experiences. Most people experience birth in a really intense haze of emotion and complexity and as a culture we really fail a lot of the time to handle that well. Birth is, for most of us, a day or two of time, but it’s a lot. Content warning on this episode for talk of birth trauma and obstetric violence, and also we give several f*cks and do not censor the audio, so just a head’s up on that, too.

What we’re talking about today is some of that birth experience Stuff, about how that influences the lives of our families and communities, and some of the really egregious disparities out there in the world of childbirth. We start by sharing our experiences a little to give you some background on us and how we approached things when our babies were born.

In the second half of our school-choice-two-parter, we talk about all the caveats we make for families who make alternative decisions to meet the needs of their families.

Because this is a two-parter, there’s no intro, so here’s the info we usually include:

This is The Parent Rap, a show about inexpert parenting and trying to raise good humans in a complicated world.

Sara is: your source for the latest links on the internet that made me think of you, born and raised and planning to stay in Oklahoma.

Anna is: a writer, former doula and prenatal educator, current virtual assistant, and general supportive type in Toronto, Canada.

In this first half of our school-choice-two-parter, we talk about our backgrounds with education and some of the choices we're making for our kids with regard to their educations, and why we feel education participation, however we do that, is an important piece of how we contribute to our communities.

In this episode, we discuss parenting philosophies, things that have and haven’t worked for us, and how we protect our physical autonomy without pushing our kids away. We also discuss the Alanis Morissette profile in Self Magazine, especially her four boundaries:

You can't tell me what I'm thinking,

you can't tell me what I'm feeling,

you can't fucking touch my body/you can't do anything with my body,

and don't touch my stuff.

Beans is having a little bit of trouble gaining weight, and figuring out how to manage that is pushing up against Anna’s complicated issues with food. Sara reflects on her similar experiences when attempting to breastfeed Chips. Anna and Sara discuss body image, how the cult of breastfeeding is bullshit*, and how having kids can just bring up all your Stuff.

*We may use the phrase “breastfeeding is bullshit,” by which we do NOT mean that breastfeeding isn’t awesome (when it works), only that the pressure to breastfeed at all costs can be really, really damaging to the people encouraged to do it, and sometimes it’s more important to enjoy being with your baby than it is to feed them in a particular way.

Cool Stuff

Chips is taking tae kwon do and learning how to use her body in cool ways to be stronger. Beans is learning to be brave about new textures and activities, and has explored at the beach (and Anna finds it really cool that having Beans to pay attention to makes being self-conscious a non-issue).

Resources & Information

Li’l Babies

CDC weight and size standards for kiddos

Calorie needs for chestfeeding

Tips for helping toddlers gain weight

Older Babies/Kids

Modelling Healthy Body Image

Modelling Healthy Eating Habits