The Pastor’s Studio with Paul Basden

Can a marriage survive an affair? After Aaron confessed to being unfaithful, everything Claire believed about their marriage was shattered. They faced a painful question: Was it possible to rebuild what had been broken?

In Part 2 of their conversation with Pastor Paul Basden, Aaron and Claire Thurmon share what happened after the confession and the long, difficult road toward healing. From counseling and honest conversations to trusted friends who walked alongside them, they reflect on what it took to rebuild trust, the difference between confession and repentance, and what their marriage looks like nine years later.

If you're navigating betrayal, struggling in your marriage, or wondering whether healing is possible, this conversation offers an honest look at restoration. Aaron and Claire don't offer easy answers or a perfect ending. Instead, they share what they've learned about forgiveness, rebuilding trust, and finding hope in God's faithfulness, even when life doesn't turn out the way you imagined.

Topics include:

How an emotional affair became a physical affair

Confessing infidelity and facing the aftermath

Rebuilding trust after betrayal in marriage

The role of marriage counseling, accountability, and community

What marriage looks like nine years after an affair

Finding hope and healing without minimizing the pain

This is Part 2 of a two-part conversation. In Part 1, Claire and Aaron share the baggage they carried into their marriage and the environment that allowed secrets to brew.

Five Things That Transformed My Marriage After My Affair, Aaron Thurmon, Guest Blog

Five Things I Needed to Hear After My Husband’s Affair, Claire Thurmon, Guest Blog

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From the outside, Claire and Aaron Thurmon seemed to be doing everything right. They met through college, built their relationship around faith, married young, and started a family. But beneath the surface, both were carrying struggles and expectations that would eventually threaten everything they had built.

In Part 1 of this deeply personal conversation with Pastor Paul Basden, Claire and Aaron reflect on their very different childhoods and the patterns they unknowingly brought into marriage. From people-pleasing and perfectionism to emotional isolation, pornography, and the need for control, they share how unresolved struggles can quietly create distance between two people—even when everything looks fine on the outside.

Whether you're newly married, navigating challenges in your relationship, or wondering how your past may be affecting your present, this conversation offers an honest look at the things we bring into marriage and why acknowledging them matters.

Topics include:

How childhood experiences shape marriage and relationships

People-pleasing, perfectionism, and the need for control

Emotional isolation and difficulty with vulnerability

The impact of pornography on marriage

Unspoken expectations and unhealthy relationship patterns

Why a marriage can look healthy while struggling beneath the surface

This is Part 1 of a two-part conversation. In Part 2, Claire and Aaron share the betrayal that brought their hidden struggles into the open and the long road toward healing.

What happens when the marriage you thought you had falls apart overnight?

For Aaron and Claire, the discovery of an affair shattered their expectations for marriage and forced them to confront years of hurt, secrecy, fear, and unhealthy patterns. What followed was not a quick fix, but a long and difficult journey toward honesty, healing, and restoration.

In this conversation, Aaron and Claire share the story behind their marriage crisis, from the childhood experiences and personal struggles they brought into their relationship to the choices that led to infidelity.

They talk openly about the difference between confession and repentance, why professional counseling and trusted friendships mattered, and how they began rebuilding trust.

They also explain why marriage restoration takes time and why forgiveness does not mean pretending the pain never happened.

This episode is for couples facing a marriage crisis, anyone affected by infidelity, and those wondering whether healing is possible after betrayal. Aaron and Claire offer an honest picture of what recovery can look like, the importance of seeking help rather than suffering in isolation, and the hope of seeing God work in the middle of brokenness.

Their story is a reminder that a painful chapter does not have to be the final chapter—and that no one should have to walk through it alone.

Topics include:

Rebuilding trust and restoring a marriage after infidelity

The difference between confession and genuine repentance

How childhood experiences shape adult relationships and marriage

The role of Christian marriage counseling and accountability

Navigating grief, forgiveness, and healing after an affair

Finding hope and faith during a marriage crisis

READ:

Psalm 51:10 

2 Corinthians 

1 John 4 

What happens when the chaos you grew up with follows you into adulthood?

For Marcie Bazor, a childhood shaped by her father’s alcoholism and anger gave way to years of rebellion, partying, and searching for something that could fill the loneliness she carried. Even when she knew about God, she struggled to live out her faith. Her story is a reminder that knowing about Jesus and learning to follow Him are not always the same thing.

In this episode of The Pastor’s Studio, Marcie shares how God began changing her life through Christian radio, prayer, and a growing hunger for Scripture.

She opens up about her husband Tim’s battle with alcoholism and drug addiction, the role of faith and community in his recovery, and how her family’s painful experiences helped inspire Blake’s House, a ministry providing housing, support, and loving relationships for young adults who have aged out of foster care or experienced homelessness.

She also shares a powerful perspective on guilt, grace, and the belief that our past mistakes are too great for God to forgive.

If you’ve ever struggled with shame, wondered whether God could still use you, or watched someone you love battle addiction, Marcie's story offers hope and a different way to see your past. You’ll hear how faith can grow over time, why lasting change often requires the support of others, and how accepting God’s grace can help you stop living under the weight of yesterday and begin walking in freedom.

Topics include:

Growing up in a family affected by alcoholism, anger, and childhood trauma

Finding faith in adulthood through Christian radio, prayer, and reading the Bible

Marriage, addiction recovery, and the role of Christian community in lasting change

Overcoming shame, guilt, and the feeling that your past makes you unworthy of God’s grace

Blake’s House: supporting young adults aging out of foster care and experiencing homelessness

Turning personal pain into purpose through faith, service, and loving relationships

What happens when drinking stops being something you can control—and starts controlling you?

Tim Bazor spent years convincing himself he could keep working, keep his relationships intact, and keep his drinking under control.

But in 2011, severe health problems, addiction, and a growing dependence on alcohol and prescription drugs forced him to face what he had been hiding.

Tim shares the story of growing up Mormon, walking away from church as a teenager, meeting his wife Marcie, and slowly moving from social drinking into addiction.

He talks honestly about the hospitalization that changed everything, the intervention that led him to rehab, and the simple prayer that marked the beginning of a new life: asking God for help. He also explains how sobriety, recovery, honesty, and faith have reshaped his relationship with God and the people around him.

This episode is especially for anyone struggling with alcohol or addiction, someone who loves a person caught in addiction, or anyone who feels like they are living a double life. Tim’s story offers an honest look at recovery, the hard work of getting sober, and the hope he found when he finally stopped pretending and trusted God.

Tim Baszor’s journey from teenage drinking to alcohol addiction

Recognizing when drinking becomes an addiction

Tim’s 2011 hospitalization with severe pancreatitis

Getting honest with family, friends, and yourself about addiction

Alcoholics Anonymous, the 12 Steps, and early sobriety

How recovery changed Tim’s relationship with God and led him to help others

Malachi — discussed in the conversation in connection with giving and trusting God

Luke 6:38 — discussed in the conversation in connection with giving

The parable of the lost sheep — discussed as a picture of God pursuing those who have wandered away

This story is a reminder that asking for help isn't weakness, honesty can be the beginning of freedom, and a life that feels lost can still take a completely different direction. 

What happens when you get married without a shared faith or a clear picture of what makes a healthy marriage?

Jason and Tiffany Porter spent the first years of their marriage trying to build a life together without following Jesus. Jason carried fears shaped by his parents’ divorce, while Tiffany struggled with perfectionism, anxiety, and the pressure to get everything right.

In this conversation, Jason and Tiffany share how God gradually drew each of them to faith—and how their relationship changed when Jesus became the center of their marriage.

Jason talks about the birth of their first son, his decision to start seeking God, and the community and service that helped him grow.

Tiffany shares the moment a sermon on Romans changed how she understood perfection, grace, and her identity. Together, they describe how shared faith reshaped their communication, family values, parenting, and sense of purpose.

This episode is especially for couples who want a stronger marriage but don't know where to begin, including couples where one spouse follows Jesus and the other doesn't. Jason and Tiffany offer an honest story of two people who started in very different places and gradually learned to walk in the same direction. Their story offers encouragement for anyone wondering whether God can meet a marriage in the middle of its mess and lead it somewhere new.

Topics include:

What happens to your faith when life doesn't turn out the way you prayed it would?

Britt Herrington began asking that question at age 12, when his mother died from a brain tumor just weeks after his birthday. His childhood faith gave him a framework for belief, but it didn't give him easy answers to grief, suffering, and the goodness of God.

In this conversation, Britt shares how those questions shaped his journey through Baptist and non-denominational churches, seminary, music, and eventually Anglican worship.

He talks about the connection between theology and music, why the repeated rhythms of liturgy have become spiritually rich for him, and how the church calendar helps him orient his life around the life of Christ.

He also reflects on Psalm 90, learning to "number our days," and the place of lament in an honest life of faith.

This episode will especially resonate with people wrestling with grief, Christians who have questions that don't fit easy answers, and anyone curious about liturgical worship or the relationship between music and theology. Britt's story offers a thoughtful perspective on how faith can grow deeper through suffering, daily rhythms, beauty, and the lifelong pursuit of wisdom.

Topics include:

Grief, loss, and wrestling with God after the death of a parent

How suffering can challenge easy answers about faith

The connection between music, theology, beauty, and Christian faith

Britt Harrington's journey from Baptist and non-denominational churches to Anglican worship

Why liturgy and repetition can shape daily spiritual life

Psalm 90, numbering our days, wisdom, and the role of lament

Additional resources and recommended reads:

Lament for a Son by Nicholas Wolterstorff

A Grief Observed by C. S. Lewis

Psalm 90

What happens when the faith you’ve always accepted starts raising questions you can’t ignore?

Tim Stephens grew up in an independent, fundamentalist Baptist church, spent nine years traveling with a conservative revival ministry, and eventually became an executive pastor at a growing church.

For decades, his beliefs felt settled—until painful experiences and difficult questions about God, suffering, Scripture, and faith began to pull at the certainty he had always known.

Tim talks openly about what he calls his journey from certainty, through questioning and deconstruction, toward a faith grounded in what he could genuinely own.

He shares how exposure to different churches challenged his assumptions, how his brother-in-law’s ALS diagnosis raised questions about the sovereignty of God, and why he believes there needs to be room for people to ask hard questions without being afraid of where those questions might lead.

He also reflects on leadership, church culture, mentoring, and discovering that administrative and organizational leadership could itself be ministry.

This conversation will especially resonate with pastors, church leaders, and Christians who have inherited a faith framework but are beginning to ask deeper questions about what they actually believe. Tim’s story offers a thoughtful perspective on questioning faith without assuming that questions have to lead away from Jesus—and on how a person can arrive at a faith marked by humility rather than certainty about everything.

In This Episode

Growing up in a fundamentalist Christian church

Legalism and the pressure to have the “right” answer

Questioning and deconstructing inherited beliefs

Faith, doubt, suffering, and questions about God’s sovereignty

Church leadership and the role of an executive pastor

Building a healthy church culture and leading with curiosity

How do you keep trusting God when the pain doesn’t go away?

Kristen Basden has undergone 45 surgeries and lives with a rare genetic condition that has changed what her body can do, but she refuses to let those limitations define her life.

In this deeply personal episode of This Is My Story, Pastor Paul Basden sits down with his daughter Kristen to talk about growing up as a pastor’s kid, navigating chronic pain and unanswered questions, and learning to focus on what she can do rather than everything she can’t.

Through surgeries, setbacks and seasons that looked nothing like she expected, Kristen has held onto the words of Psalm 139 and the truth that she is fully known by God.

“He knows me and has known me and will continue to know me more than I’ll ever know myself.”

Kristen’s story is a reminder that even when circumstances don’t change, God can still use our hardest seasons to encourage someone else.

Can you build a new marriage with the same person?

Warren and Sonya Jacobs fell in love as teenagers, married at 20, and were determined to build a life together. But beneath the surface, years of conflict avoidance, codependency and unresolved hurt were slowly pulling them apart.

In this episode of This Is My Story, Pastor Paul Basden sits down with Warren and Sonya for an honest conversation about the moment they realized, “We are not okay,” and the counseling, community and faith that helped them begin again.

More than 20 years later, they share what they’ve learned about grace, forgiveness, intimacy, identity in Christ and doing the hard work of repairing a relationship.

“Our marriage as it was was really over... We wanted a new marriage. We had to have a new marriage.”

For anyone wondering if deeply rooted patterns can really change, Warren and Sonya’s story offers a powerful reminder: “Your relationship can change. We’re a testimony right now.”