The Path We Choose

In this episode of The Path We Choose, Umer Farooque and Musa Waqas explore why we follow inherited beliefs, how society shapes our identity, and why admitting we are wrong takes courage. The conversation looks at how parents, teachers, and scholars influence our understanding of Islam and why questioning something we have always accepted can feel uncomfortable.

Musa explains what he means by sheep psychology and shepherd psychology, connecting these ideas to Awam vs Khawas, the pressure to fit in, and the fear of becoming an outcast. They also discuss how beliefs become part of our identity and why recognising a mistake is an essential first step towards changing ourselves.

The conversation then explores how to challenge someone’s ideas and help them reconsider their views. Through examples involving family expectations, teaching, and public speaking, Musa explains the importance of authority, fascination, language, relevance, and empathy when communicating with others.

In this episode, we discuss:

• How parents, teachers, and society shape our identity
• Inherited religious beliefs and blind following
• Sheep psychology and shepherd psychology
• Awam vs Khawas
• Why people struggle to admit they are wrong
• Courage and the fear of standing out
• Challenging family expectations respectfully
• Authority and fascination in teaching
• Connecting through language, relevance, and empathy
• Finding common ground before challenging someone’s ideas

At the heart of this conversation is a reminder that growth requires the courage to examine what we believe, recognise our mistakes, and remain willing to learn.

Have you ever changed your mind about something you were raised to believe? What made you reconsider it? Share your experience in the comments.

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Many of us inherit our religious beliefs from our parents, teachers, communities, and scholars. But how often do we stop to question what we believe, where those beliefs come from, and whether they are actually rooted in the Quran and Sunnah?In Episode 41 of The Path We Choose, Musa Waqas joins us for a thought-provoking conversation about Muslim identity, blind following, religious scholarship, and the difference between Islam and the cultural practices we've grown up with.We explore why questioning inherited beliefs can be uncomfortable, the importance of understanding religious evidence, and why Islam is far more than a set of rituals. The conversation also takes us into some difficult discussions about marriage and divorce, masculinity, accountability, women's rights, and the responsibilities that come with calling ourselves Muslims.From challenging long-held assumptions to examining how we treat others, this episode asks an important question: Are we allowing Islam to shape our lives, or are we shaping Islam around the lives we already lead?In this episode, we discuss:

• Finding Sirat al-Mustaqeem amid different schools of thought
• Blind following, inherited beliefs, and questioning scholars
• The Quran, Sunnah, and authenticity of Hadith
• Cultural expectations, marriage, divorce, and dignity
• The relationship between Deen and Duniya
• Masculinity, women's rights, and personal accountability
• Why identifying as Muslim comes with responsibilityHadith Clarification (45:41)The popular story of a Jewish woman throwing garbage at Prophet Muhammad ﷺ, whom he later visited when she fell ill, has no established authentic chain of narration.However, authentic narrations confirm that the Prophet ﷺ visited a sick Jewish boy (Sahih al-Bukhari 1356) and endured mistreatment while praying (Sahih al-Bukhari 240).References:https://sunnah.com/bukhari/1356https://sunnah.com/bukhari/240https://islamqa.org/hanafi/islamicpor...At the heart of this conversation is a reminder that faith should be rooted in understanding, not merely inherited through tradition. Questioning what we've been taught does not have to mean questioning Islam itself. It can be an opportunity to distinguish cultural expectations from religious teachings, deepen our understanding of the Quran and Sunnah, and take greater responsibility for how we live our lives.Follow Musa Waqas:Instagram:   / immbwj  YouTube:    / @immbwj  Follow Umer Farooque & The Path We Choose:Website: https://thepathwechoose.comInstagram:   / umerfarooquee  LinkedIn:   / mumerfarooque  TPWC Instagram:   / thepathwechoosee  

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In this episode of The Path We Choose, Umer Farooque and Dr. Kanwal Kaisser explore what happens when the honeymoon phase ends and the realities of marriage begin to surface.

The conversation looks at emotional maturity, communication, respect between husband and wife, and why unresolved resentment can eventually affect the entire family. Dr. Kanwal also explains why couples should not wait until a marriage is falling apart before they start learning, seeking guidance, or getting outside help.

They also discuss how children absorb what they see at home, why disrespect between spouses can shape their future relationships, and how career, financial independence, and modern ideas of individualism are changing the way many young people think about marriage.

In this episode, we discuss:

• What happens after the honeymoon phase

• The disillusionment and “misery” phases of marriage

• Why emotional maturity matters

• Respect between husband and wife

• How marital conflict affects children

• Why children copy what they see at home

• When couples should seek counseling or coaching

• The danger of unresolved resentment

• Financial independence and modern marriage

• Why some young people no longer see marriage as necessary

• Career, family, and responsibility

• Why couples need to keep learning together

At the heart of this conversation is a reminder that a strong marriage does not happen automatically. It requires learning, communication, respect, and the willingness to grow through every stage of life.

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In this episode of The Path We Choose, Umer Farooquee sits down with Dr. Kanwal Kaisser for a conversation about women in Islam, career aspirations, marriage, personal growth, and finding the right balance between our worldly responsibilities and our relationship with Allah.As a pediatrician, educator, and student of the Quran, Dr. Kanwal shares her personal journey of navigating professional life, family responsibilities, and dawah while keeping her intentions aligned with her faith.The conversation explores an important question: Can Muslim women pursue their ambitions without compromising their families or Islamic values?Dr. Kanwal challenges the idea that every woman must follow the same path. Whether someone chooses to build a career, focus on raising a family, or pursue both, she explains why understanding our priorities, developing ourselves, and taking responsibility for our decisions matter far more than following societal expectations.Umer and Dr. Kanwal also discuss the challenges within modern marriages, financial independence, emotional maturity, the responsibilities of husbands and wives, and why personal growth should never stop after marriage.In this episode, we discuss:Career, marriage, and balancing Islamic responsibilitiesFinding purpose beyond societal expectationsWhy Muslim women need a growth mindsetFinancial independence vs. financial intelligenceEmotional maturity in modern marriagesThe responsibilities of husbands and wivesRaising children through example and teamworkUnderstanding and implementing the QuranFinding inspiration in the women of IslamMaintaining sincere intentions for AllahAt the heart of this conversation is a reminder that Islam does not require everyone to live identical lives. Our circumstances, abilities, and struggles may differ, but our responsibility is to make the most of what Allah has given us.DONATE TO HCI: https://www.launchgood.com/v4/campaig...DONATE TO LUQMAN: https://luqmalive.netlify.app/?utm_so...Follow Dr. Kanwal Kaisser:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_kanwal_k...Facebook:   / drkanwalkaisser  LinkedIn:   / dr-kanwal-kaisser-08890522  Youtube:    / @kanwalkaisser  Follow Umer Farooque & The Path We Choose:Website: https://thepathwechoose.comInstagram:   / umerfarooquee  LinkedIn:   / mumerfarooque  TPWC Instagram:   / thepathwechoosee  Subscribe to The Path We Choose for conversations on faith, identity, responsibility, purpose, and the path we choose.

In this episode of The Path We Choose, Umer Farooquee explores a fundamental question every Muslim eventually has to confront: How do you know whether the Islam you are following is actually authentic?For many of us, religion begins with what we inherit. We learn from our parents, who learned from their parents, while people outside Islam may form their entire understanding of the faith through media, culture, or misinformation. But when so many different interpretations, opinions, and traditions exist, where does someone actually go to find the truth?Dr. Hammad explains this through a simple analogy: if you want pure water, you go back to the source. The further water travels, the more opportunities there are for contamination. In the same way, he argues that understanding Islam requires returning to its foundational sources: the Quran and authentic teachings of the Prophet ﷺ.The conversation also addresses an important tension. Should Muslims simply read the Quran themselves and form their own understanding? Or should they completely rely on a scholar or teacher? Dr. Hammad argues against both extremes. Personal interpretation alone can turn religion into something shaped by our own preferences, while blindly following another person can disconnect us from the evidence behind what we believe.The episode also explores the difference between worship and everyday life. In acts of worship, Dr. Hammad explains that there must be evidence for what we do. But in ordinary worldly matters, things are generally permissible unless there is evidence prohibiting them. Understanding that distinction helps explain how Islamic principles can remain applicable even as technology, culture, and everyday life continue to change.In this episode, we discuss:• How do you know if your understanding of Islam is correct?• Inheriting religion from parents and forefathers• Where Muslims should seek authentic Islamic knowledge• The Quran and authentic Hadith as primary sources• Why the chain of narration matters• How Hadith authenticity is established• Reading the Quran without proper context• The danger of creating a self-serving version of Islam• Why Muslims should not blindly follow teachers• The role of scholars in connecting us to authentic knowledge• The difference between personal opinion and evidence• Why worship requires proof from the Sunnah• The difference between worship and everyday matters• How Islamic principles remain applicable in modern lifeAt the heart of this conversation is a question bigger than simply “Who taught me Islam?”It is: Can what I believe be traced back to the source?Because seeking knowledge is not about accepting every opinion we hear or shaping religion around what feels comfortable. It is about making the effort to understand what Allah revealed and what the Prophet ﷺ actually taught.Follow Umer Farooque & The Path We Choose:Website: https://thepathwechoose.comInstagram:   / umerfarooquee  LinkedIn:   / mumerfarooque  TPWC Instagram:   / thepathwechoosee  Full Episode Link:    • Are You Actually Living Islam Correctly? |...  Subscribe to The Path We Choose for real conversations on faith, family, identity, purpose, and the path we choose.

In this episode of The Path We Choose, Umer Farooquee sits down with Dr. Hammad Lakhvi for a conversation about purpose, effort, Islamic knowledge, personal responsibility, and what it actually means to live as a Muslim.

Dr. Hammad reflects on the unexpected direction of his own life and explains why our path may not always look the way we planned it. Rather than constantly comparing ourselves with others, he argues that every person has been given different abilities, circumstances, and responsibilities. Our job is to give our best effort and place our trust in Allah.

The conversation then explores a question many Muslims struggle with today: How do we actually know what is right?

With so many opinions, scholars, traditions, and interpretations available, Dr. Hammad discusses the importance of returning to authentic sources of knowledge. He explores the relationship between the Qur'an, the teachings of the Prophet ﷺ, seeking knowledge for yourself, trusting qualified teachers, and asking for evidence rather than following opinions blindly.

In this episode, we discuss:

Why everyone's test is different
Hard work, effort, and trusting Allah
Why comparing yourself to others is dangerous
How to know if you're on the right path
Where Muslims should seek authentic knowledge
Qur'an, Hadith, and the Prophetic example
How much Islamic knowledge every Muslim needs
Islam in business and everyday life
Keeping the Hereafter as your real destination
Why character can be the strongest form of dawah

Ultimately, the conversation asks us to reconsider what success really means.
You may not control where life takes you or what results come from your effort. But you can control whether you sincerely use what Allah has given you, seek the truth, and live according to it.

Follow Dr. Hammad Lakhvi:
Website: https://hammadlakhvi.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drhammadlakhvi/?hl=en
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-muhammad-hammad-lakhvi-870b6263/

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In this episode of The Path We Choose, Umer Farooque explores one of the most critical responsibilities in Islam: raising children with strong values, respect, and character in a world that constantly challenges those principles.

The conversation addresses the stages of parenting and what parents must understand at each phase of their child's development. It begins with a fundamental truth: children learn more from what they see than from what they are told. Before parents can expect their children to embody respect, discipline, and faith, they must first look at the example they are setting themselves.

The discussion emphasizes the importance of the relationship between husband and wife and how it shapes a child's entire worldview. When parents argue, fight, or disrespect each other in front of their children, they break something fundamental in the child's understanding of stability, trust, and relationships. For a child, their mother and father represent security and ideals. When that foundation is shattered by constant conflict, the effects carry into adulthood, influencing how they view marriage, family, and emotional security.

As children grow older and enter their teenage years, the challenges become more complex. This is the age where external influences become stronger, where peer pressure intensifies, and where children are exposed to things parents may not even be aware of. In schools today, whether in Pakistan or elsewhere, children have access to cigarettes, vapes, harmful behaviors, and ideas that contradict the values parents are trying to instill. The question becomes: How do parents navigate this stage without losing their relationship with their child?

The conversation tackles an uncomfortable scenario: What do you do when you discover your child has done something wrong? Should parents respond with anger, guilt, or fear? Or is there a better approach that maintains the relationship while still guiding the child back to what is right? The discussion explores different perspectives, including the idea that some parents believe allowing their children to experiment under supervision is better than having them hide their mistakes. But is that the right approach, or does it normalize behavior that should never be accepted?

One of the most important points raised is the role of guilt and conscience. If a child grows up in an environment where wrong actions are treated as normal, they lose the internal compass that helps them distinguish right from wrong. On the other hand, if parents create such fear that children cannot come to them when they make mistakes, the relationship is broken, and the child will turn elsewhere for guidance.

The episode also addresses the reality that not all environments are suitable for raising children. Some schools, some neighborhoods, and some societies make it nearly impossible to protect children from harmful influences. In such cases, parents must make difficult decisions about where they live, where their children study, and what sacrifices they are willing to make to give their children a better chance.

In this episode, we discuss:

The stages of parenting and what matters at each phase
Why children learn by watching their parents
The impact of fighting in front of children
How parental conflict shapes a child's emotional development
The relationship between husband and wife and its effect on children
Navigating the teenage years with wisdom and balance
The dangers children face in schools today
Peer pressure, cigarettes, vapes, and harmful influences
How to respond when your child makes a mistake
Should parents use fear, guilt, or understanding?
The role of conscience and guilt in shaping behavior
Why normalizing wrong behavior leads to long term damage
The importance of maintaining a strong relationship with your child
Choosing the right environment and school for your children
When parents need to make sacrifices to protect their children

At the heart of this conversation is a simple but necessary truth: You cannot control every influence your child encounters, but you can build a relationship strong enough that they come to you when they struggle instead of hiding from you.

Because raising children is not just about preventing them from making mistakes. It is about equipping them with the character, values, and relationship that will guide them when you are not there.

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In this episode of The Path We Choose, Umer Farooque sits down with Khalid Mehmood Abbasi for a conversation about Muslim parenting, marriage, family, discipline, and what it actually takes to raise good children.

Parents often focus on finding the best school, the best tutor, or someone to teach their children the Quran. But Khalid Mehmood Abbasi raises a more important question: How much work are we doing on ourselves as parents?

The conversation explores why the home is a child’s first environment and why children learn far more from what they see their parents do than from what they are repeatedly told. Before trying to teach values, discipline, modesty, faith, and character, parents have to understand the example they are setting themselves.

Khalid also explains why the relationship between husband and wife plays such an important role in a child’s development. A peaceful and secure home gives a child something that schools, tutors, and material opportunities cannot replace. The discussion looks at the responsibilities of both parents, the father’s role within the family, and why children should not grow up surrounded by conflict between the two people they look up to most.

They also discuss how parenting should change as children grow. From allowing young children to learn naturally, to setting boundaries, dealing with teenagers, correcting mistakes without creating rebellion, and eventually developing a relationship where children can speak openly with their parents.

The conversation ultimately challenges the idea that good parenting is simply about controlling children or giving them every opportunity. Raising better children begins with becoming better parents.

In this episode, we discuss:

What makes a good Muslim parent
Why parenting starts with the parents
Why children learn by watching us
The importance of the home environment
Education vs. character development
Why young children need freedom to learn
Discipline without creating rebellion
How parents should handle teenagers
The relationship between husband and wife
A father’s responsibility in the family
Why parents should lead by example
Fighting in front of children
Building trust with your children
Marriage, family, and Islamic responsibility

At the heart of this conversation is a simple question:

Before asking what kind of child we are raising, should we first ask what kind of parent we are becoming?

Children are always learning from us, even when we are not trying to teach them.

Follow Khalid Mehmood Abbasi:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/khalidmehmoodabbasiofficial/

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What does it really mean to celebrate freedom?

In this episode of The Path We Choose, Umer Farooquee sits down for a deeply reflective conversation about identity, nationalism, faith, and the uncomfortable truths about how we live as Muslims today.

The conversation begins with a challenging question: When we have clear data and facts in front of us, why do we struggle to accept them? From there, the discussion moves into difficult territory about modesty, responsibility, and victim blaming. The conversation makes it clear that there is never any justification for harassment or assault, regardless of what someone is wearing. Blaming the victim is wrong, and the real issue lies in a society that fails to hold perpetrators accountable through proper punishment and justice.

They explore how our identities are shaped not by faith, but by ethnicity, political parties, and nationalism. During election season, we proudly declare ourselves as Punjabi, Muhajir, or supporters of political parties, but we rarely lead with the fact that we are Muslims. Our divisions run deeper than our unity, and our character often reflects our cultural conditioning rather than the teachings of Islam.

They also discuss the dangers of nationalism and superiority. The first sin ever committed was the sin of superiority when Iblis refused to bow to Adam. Today, we repeat that same sin when we look down on others because of nationality, ethnicity, or social class. Whether it's refusing to eat from the same plate as someone we consider beneath us or treating domestic workers as inferior, these attitudes contradict the core teachings of Islam.

The episode closes with a reflection on Pakistan's Independence Day and how we choose to celebrate it. While freedom is a blessing from Allah, our celebrations often involve reckless behavior, accidents, and actions that dishonor the very gift we were given. When the Prophet ﷺ was granted victory in Mecca, he entered with humility and gratitude, not with noise and chaos. The question is raised: Are we truly honoring our blessings, or are we taking them for granted?

In this episode, we discuss:

Accepting uncomfortable truths and data
Victim blaming and the responsibility of society
Why modesty is important but never justifies harm
The need for accountability and justice
How nationalism divides us as Muslims
Identity, ethnicity, and political loyalty
Why Islam is more than rituals
Character as the foundation of faith
The sin of superiority and looking down on others
Cultural practices that contradict Islamic values
What it means to truly celebrate freedom
Gratitude, humility, and how the Prophet ﷺ honored victory
Why we need to reflect on how we live as Muslims today

At the heart of this conversation is a simple but necessary question: Are we living as Muslims, or are we simply performing Islam while our hearts, behavior, and priorities remain unchanged?

Because Islam was never meant to be a cultural identity or a set of rituals. It was meant to transform who we are.

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Episode 37 Link: https://youtu.be/QwQ0YBnMX80

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What does it actually mean to live as a Muslim?

In this episode of ‘The Path We Choose’ Umer Farooque sits down with Tayyab Abid for a deep conversation about Islam, purpose, submission, character, identity, and what it truly means to live your faith beyond rituals.

The conversation challenges one of the biggest misconceptions about Islam: that being a good Muslim is simply about praying five times a day, fasting in Ramadan, and fulfilling a set of religious rituals. Tayyab explains why submission to Allah is much broader than rituals and why Islam is meant to shape every part of our lives.

They explore the difference between simply performing religious obligations and actually allowing Islam to transform your character, decisions, relationships, health, mindset, and everyday life. Tayyab also talks about the importance of physical fitness within Islam, not simply for appearance, but because taking care of your body can help you serve your family, worship better, and become an example for others.

The conversation goes further into character and identity why looking religious on the outside means little if our behavior and character don't reflect our faith, and why Muslims need to distinguish between their cultural identity and their identity as believers.

In this episode, we discuss:

The true purpose of a Muslim
What submission to Allah really means
Why Islam is more than rituals
Prayer, fasting and the broader meaning of worship
Why character is central to faith
Islam as a complete way of life
The importance of physical fitness in Islam
Faith, identity and culture
Why Muslims shouldn't confuse culture with religion
Applying Quranic guidance to modern life
Criticism vs. genuine self-correction
The responsibility of individuals to improve society
What Muslims can learn from Islamic history
How faith should influence our everyday decisions

At the heart of this conversation is a simple but powerful question:
Are we merely performing Islam, or are we actually living it?

Because Islam was never meant to be confined to rituals. It is meant to shape who we are, how we behave, how we treat people, and how we live our entire lives.

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Website: https://ihsaas.pk/about-us/board-of-trustees/tayyab-abid/
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