The Pilgrimage With Shelby Bowen

Many Christians feel caught swinging between two extremes:
love yourself through manifestation and self-focus—or die to yourself until you disappear. Both promise freedom.

Both often leave people anxious, insecure, or confused. In this episode, we talk about the Christian pendulum between self-love and self-erasure—and why neither reflects the heart of the Gospel. We explore how “biblical manifestation” mirrors prosperity theology, how extreme self-denial can become self-focused, and what Scripture actually offers instead: a faith anchored in God’s character, not control or shame.

If obedience ever felt like fear, or faith left you distrusting yourself, this conversation is for you. There is a way to follow God without disappearing—and a way to grow without making yourself the center.

Do you ever feel like your life is out of control? Maybe things aren’t going the way you thought they would, and you’re left wondering, “Where is God in all of this?”

In today’s episode, I’m sharing a reminder we all need: God is in control. Even when life feels uncertain or overwhelming, He is faithful, He has a plan, and He hasn’t forgotten you. Take a few minutes to pause, breathe, and let this truth sink in—you can trust Him with your story. 💬 I’d love to hear from you!

How is God teaching you to trust Him right now? Share your thoughts with me. If this encouraged you, don’t forget to subscribe, share it with a friend who needs hope today, and leave a review—it helps more people find encouragement in Christ.

It’s very normal & common for people who have experienced trauma in a church setting or by a religious figure to have a hard time viewing God the same as before. So if you are struggling with that, it’s not your fault! & you aren’t alone.

💖FREE 15-minute Discovery Call: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/packages/87477
💖Email me to work 1:1 [email protected]
💖More resources: https://paperbell.me/the-bowens
#religioustrauma #spiritualabuse #christianwomen #theologymatters #gratitudechallenge #subconsciousthinkers

Progress isn't the highlight reel of life you're seeing across social media. Progress is NOT landing the new job, meeting your spouse, having a baby, or moving somewhere new. Progress can feel extremely isolating, lonely, tense, and even...boring Let's talk about how progress can change your life and result in the byproducts of achievements in our romantic and career life.

💖Work with me 1:1 (Discovery Call): https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/packages/87477
💖 Book my 8-week 1:1 Support: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/packages/58224
💖FREE support group for healing from spiritual abuse: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/packages/68005
💖More resources: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/packages?provider_id=34053

Finding your purpose in life can feel daunting...it sure sounds like it just reading that statement.

In today's video I'm going to be sharing with you how to discover your purpose, take the pressure off, and break down how the church has overspiritualized finding "purpose and calling."

After this you'll feel encouraged and ready to discover your God given talents.

💖Work with me 1:1 (Discovery Call): https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/pa...
💖 Book my 8-week 1:1 Support: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/pa...
💖FREE support group for healing from spiritual abuse: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/pa...
💖More resources: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/pa...

Today we are breaking down historically who Jezebel was. We will be talking about how there is no term in the Bible called a Jezebel spirit nor is there any reference to an evil spirit being named after a human being.

I'll share the common rebuttal points on this and how we can respond with scripture.

💖FREE support group for healing from spiritual abuse: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/packages/68005
💖Email me to work 1:1 [email protected]
💖More resources: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/packages?provider_id=34053
#spiritualabuse #christianlifecoach #deconstruction #churchhurt #innerhealing #jezebel #theologymatters

We all have disappointment! It's normal and it's unfortunately apart of life.

For those of you who've been part of a high-control religion, you've probably been made to feel like you have to respond perfectly when disappointment comes. When we don't respond "perfectly" because we aren't perfect...we beat ourselves up.

In today's video, I share with you how I'm currently processing disappointing news in my life and scriptural references to Jesus' empathy and compassion with our questions and disappointment in him.

💖Email me to work 1:1 [email protected]
💖More resources: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/packages?provider_id=34053
#spiritualabuse #christianlifecoach #deconstruction #churchhurt #innerhealing

People pleasing is a coping mechanism we adopt when we feel in danger. It's a way to protect ourselves from vulnerability.

To it's core, people pleasing is deceptive because it's dishonest. Women and men in toxic religious environments often find themselves adopting this coping mechanism thinking they are doing what God has called them to do which is "love well."

Loving well does not mean loving at the expense of your mental, emotional, and physical health. In today's video, we break all of this down and how to heal from people pleasing!

Email me to work 1:1 [email protected]
More resources: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/packages?provider_id=34053
#spiritualabuse #christianlifecoach #deconstruction #peoplepleasing

Welcome back!

In today's podcast, I sat down with  @suzette-themarriagewarrior-  again to talk about deconstruction/healing from purity culture and breaking off of shame!

💖If you're interested in the life coaching training program use CODE: SHELBYCO at checkout for 10% OFF: https://www.marriagewarriorinstitute.com/mwi/spiritual-lifecoaching
💖Email me to work 1:1 [email protected]
💖More resources + JOIN THE SUPPORT GROUP HERE: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/packages?provider_id=34053

Other videos with Suzette:
👉What Happens When the Church DOESN'T Unconditionally Love You: https://youtu.be/55o0Ce7F398
👉Recognizing Abuse of the Tithe and Emotional Manipulation in Financial Giving: https://youtu.be/LixRl9KfryU
👉A Story of Reconnecting With God Through Spiritual Abuse: https://youtu.be/_Sh-lyqi0Iw

I am not a licensed psychologist or specialist healthcare professional. This video does not replace the care of psychologists or other healthcare professionals.

Welcome back to my channel! Today's video is a topic that has been all over my conversations lately.

Why do we make excuses for not going after what's on our hearts? There are many reasons why we could be doing this and in today's video, we are going to work through how to step into the dreams and desires that God has put on your heart.

We talk about:
💖 Putting ourselves out there into the world
💖 The call to adventure in "stuck" seasons
💖 Practical day-to-day steps
💖 Overcoming negative thoughts

Email me to work 1:1 [email protected]
More resources + JOIN THE SUPPORT GROUP HERE: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/packages?provider_id=34053

I am not a licensed psychologist or specialist healthcare professional. This video does not replace the care of psychologists or other healthcare professionals.
#spiritualabuse #christianlifecoach #deconstruction