The Pop-Up Pod

What if you really want a partner, but don't yet have one? Why do we think it "means" something about us if we aren't yet in the relationships we thought we would be by a certain age?

Holly Whitaker (she/her) joins us today to talk about her experience of being mostly single over the past 10 years. She shares honestly about what it’s like to really want something, to feel like you’re missing out by not having it, and yet to also somehow also know that you aren’t ready. This conversation is filled with such wonderful nuance, and Holly and I do our best to each hold space for the both/ands of life—where seemingly contradictory things are true at the same exact time.

You can find Holly at hollywhitaker.substack.com and on IG: @holly

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The Pop-Up Pod is 100% listener-supported via our sliding scale Patreon (thanks, ya'll!) which ensures that everyone involved in the show's creation & production gets paid (host, sound engineer, transcriptionist, and all guests!) 

[Full transcript of this episode is available here]

How can our boundaries support deeper intimacy? What do we lose when we're stuck in a loop of people-pleasing? 

Natalie Lue (she/her) joins us to share stories about some of the obstacles to intimacy she’s had to navigate—such as people-pleasing and poor boundaries. In the realm of boundaries she also shares about her experience of needing to creating healthier boundaries with extended family, especially when they overstep with your partner. So real, right? I love it.

You can find Natalie at baggagereclaim.co.uk and on IG: @natlue

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The Pop-Up Pod is 100% listener-supported via our sliding scale Patreon (thanks, ya'll!) which ensures that everyone involved in the show's creation & production gets paid (host, sound engineer, transcriptionist, and all guests!) 

[Full transcript of this episode is available here]

How do you heal on purpose? What might help to bring you back to yourself after a life-changingly hard experience?

Cait Flanders (she/her) joins us to talk about healing. More specifically, she shares what the past 2.5 years have been like while healing from a sex-related trauma. (So yes, this is a gentle content warning for you about the conversation ahead, but know that Cait does not go into any detail at all about the experience, and instead this is a beautifully honest and thoughtful accounting of what helped to bring her back to herself as well as what she wants from dating and sex now that she is open to those things again.)

She shares about therapy, about how the commitment to no longer accepting harmful treatment in one relationship wound up changing pretty much all of her relationships, why she bought herself all new sex toys, how she is romancing herself, and more.

You can find Cait at caitflanders.com and on IG @caitflanders

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The Pop-Up Pod is 100% listener-supported via our sliding scale Patreon (thanks, ya'll!) which ensures that everyone involved in the show's creation & production gets paid (host, sound engineer, transcriptionist, and all guests!) 

[Full transcript of this episode is available here]

What role might therapy play in our relationships? How do we support a partner through a tough mental health time? What if both people are having a hard time at the same time?

Grizel Williams (she/her) joins us to talk about being a newlywed, and about her experiences at the intersection of marriage and mental health. 

You can find Grizel at grizelcaminas.com and on IG @_grizel_

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The Pop-Up Pod is 100% listener-supported via our sliding scale Patreon (thanks, ya'll!) which ensures that everyone involved in the show's creation & production gets paid (host, sound engineer, transcriptionist, and all guests!) 

[Full transcript of this episode is available here]

How do you know if (or when) you want to have kids? What happens to your marriage after having a baby?

Becca Piastrelli (she/her) joins us to talk about her experiences with marriage and motherhood, and in particular how having a baby was like dropping a bomb right into the center of her relationship with her husband. She talks about the decision to have a baby amidst climate grief, her experiences with miscarriage, and so much more.

You can find Becca at beccapiastrelli.com and on IG @beccapiastrelli

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The Pop-Up Pod is 100% listener-supported via our sliding scale Patreon (thanks, ya'll!) which ensures that everyone involved in the show's creation & production gets paid (host, sound engineer, transcriptionist, and all guests!) 

[Full transcript of this episode is available here]

How do you divide up chores within a partnership? How much money is shared money? What are the daily friction points of being together for many years?

Katelin Bannan (she/her) joins us to dig into all the minutia of her 11-year marriage: money, sex, chores, whether a relationship needs to stay exciting over time, and more. 

You can find Katelin on IG @katelinb and on Twitter @katelin

**

The Pop-Up Pod is 100% listener-supported via our sliding scale Patreon (thanks, ya'll!) which ensures that everyone involved in the show's creation & production gets paid (host, sound engineer, transcriptionist, and all guests!) 

[Full transcript of this episode is available here]

Today I’m here with a little minisode for you, a peek behind the scenes if you will, which is a chance for me to answer two questions I’ve been getting from folks since this show started back in January. The first question is why I chose a pop-up style and what that will mean for new seasons going forward. And the second question is about how my listener-funded actually model works, and what it looks like to join our Patreon community.

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The Pop-Up Pod is 100% listener-supported via our sliding scale Patreon (thanks, ya'll!) which ensures that everyone involved in the show's creation & production gets paid (host, sound engineer, transcriptionist, and all guests!) 

[Full transcript of this episode is available here]

How do you know when it's time to leave a relationship? What if leaving means breaking your own heart? 

Sasha Glasgow (she/her) joins us to share about her own tender experience of navigating heartbreak, about the doubts and fears that kept her in a relationship longer than she maybe should have stayed, and about the fact that grief has no timeline.

You can find Sasha at frankandfeel.com and on IG @frankandfeel

**

The Pop-Up Pod is 100% listener-supported via our sliding scale Patreon (thanks, ya'll!) which ensures that everyone involved in the show's creation & production gets paid (host, sound engineer, transcriptionist, and all guests!) 

[Full transcript of this episode is available here]

In what ways do you have an invisible job description for your partner? Which stories are alive in your relationship that keep each other in certain roles?

Calvin Michael West (he/they) joins us to talk about the roles we play in our relationships, as well as weddings, boundaries and requests, and how to get more comfortable hearing a “no” from your partner.

You can find Calvin at inhealingwetrust.com

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The Pop-Up Pod is 100% listener-supported via our sliding scale Patreon (thanks, ya'll!) which ensures that everyone involved in the show's creation & production gets paid (host, sound engineer, transcriptionist, and all guests!) 

[Full transcript of this episode is available here]

What happens when one person wants to get married and the other person doesn’t? How can we maintain relationships with folks who have totally different needs (and ways of being) than us?

Caroline Zook (she/her) joins us to talk about the evolution of her romantic partnership, as well as the journey of getting her needs met (or, more specifically, how to ask for what you need when you're not getting it from the other person, without trying to change them or make them feel like they aren’t enough).

You can find Caroline (and her husband, Jason) at wanderingaimfully.com and on IG: @ckelso

**

The Pop-Up Pod is 100% listener-supported via our sliding scale Patreon (thanks, ya'll!) which ensures that everyone involved in the show's creation & production gets paid (host, sound engineer, transcriptionist, and all guests!) 

[Full transcript of this episode is available here]