Alice’s elderly crush visits a war zone, Chris tells us about the consequences of eating raw meat, and the Chinese government continue to probe foreigners’ anuses. We also hear the songs that Dolly Parton and the Dalai Lama sang while being vaccinated, learn about a Victorian child who was consumed by fire, and discuss how Charlton Heston got hit on by a sexy, sweaty man without realising. 

Of course, there's a freestyle rap about the week's news with an instrumental by  Bakery Beats.