The Principle Podcast

Today’s conversation is with Bill Eckstrom, an industry leader in personal and professional growth. Bill delivered a TEDx Talk in 2018 titled Why comfort will ruin your life.

Expect to learn about Bill’s concept of The Growth Rings, why and how to embrace both external and internal discomfort, and much more.

ALSO — be on the lookout for Bill’s upcoming TEDx Talk on May 21, 2022.

Enjoy!

Timestamps:

(0:55): Who is Bill Eckstrom? What are The Growth Rings?

(6:29): Knowing when to push yourself and when to back off.

(10:20): Why getting fired was the best thing to happen to Bill.

(21:11): Is anger a useless emotion?

(25:19): Why is Order actually the most dangerous state to be in?

(30:45): Parenting and creating discomfort in your kids’ lives.

(36:43): How to introduce Complexity in your own life.

(45:17): Is it possible for a mentor to also be your friend?

(49:19): What can business leaders learn from sports?

(57:00): Bill’s upcoming TEDx Talk on May 21, 2022!

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit theprinciplepodcast.substack.com

“Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.”

— Confucius

Great quote… but I actually hate this advice.

Not because it’s not true, but because it’s not actionable for 99% of people.

It makes you believe that if you do something you love, you won’t face any obstacles along the way and that success will come easy. Neither of those are true.

Unfortunately, we’re not all Serena Williams or Justin Bieber. We don’t always stumble upon our passions at an early age and pursue them relentlessly.

Instead, most of us need to work on finding what it is that we’ll spend our lives on. We’ll need to think deeply about our inclinations and curiosities.

Naval Ravikant, Peter Thiel, and Cal Newport give us their thoughts on this concept, summarized as follows:

Think deeply about your genuine curiosities. What has always come naturally to you?

Build skills around these curiosities through deliberate practice — keep refining your skillset until you’re the best (or only one) in the world.

Fascinated by different cuisines? Experiment with foods and create a new dining experience.

In short — double-down on your personality, talents, and curiosity.

So how do you get there?

By being a lifelong learner.

We’ve become so fixated on instant gratification that we forget that life is more marathon than sprint.

The learning shouldn’t stop just because you’ve graduated from college. In reality, it’s just getting started.

Tinker with ideas. Take in new information. Formulate opinions.

The best part is — doing all of these things doesn’t have to be boring. In fact, it should be the exact opposite.

Need I say more?

Think about when you have some of your best ideas:

* In the shower

* While washing dishes

* On a long walk

Learn to strike the right balance between taking in information and freely reflecting on it.

You don’t want to be the person who’s always busy. Really, the busyness is just a cover up for a lack of focus.

If your calendar is filled with places for you to be and things for you to do, when will you have time to think?

Be intentional with your time. Work hard, with intent, when it’s time to work hard.

Know when to rest and embrace the boredom. Leaving your mind unoccupied will allow it to wander into the land of creativity. That’s where the magic happens.

Thanks for listening. See you on the next episode of The Principle Podcast.

Thanks for listening to The Principle Podcast! Subscribe for free to receive new posts.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit theprinciplepodcast.substack.com

Every April, 20,000 people come together to participate in The Boston Marathon.

Let’s take it a step further…

Across eight separate events in the US, 16,000 people complete a consecutive 2.4-mile swim, a 112-mile bike ride, and a marathon, known as an Ironman.

Question — What the hell is wrong with all of these people?!

Answer — Nothing. These people have all learned that proving to themselves what they are capable of is an exercise in building unbreakable confidence.

Life in today’s day and age has gotten pretty comfortable:

* We can take showers with water hot enough to burn our skin.

* We can turn the lights on and off simply by telling Alexa to handle it.

* We can hop into the back seat of a stranger’s car and be wherever we need to be in a matter of minutes.

Don’t get me wrong — these modern day conveniences are AWESOME. I’m not going to argue that we should all crawl back into caves and start foraging for our meals.

Instead, let’s think about why discipline is a total game-changer.

Every January, your gym becomes the most dreaded part of your day because of the New-Year’s-Resolution-ers. By the third week of the month, however, the new crowd fizzles out and it’s back to business.

You complain about how you have no time to read, while your iPhone tells you you’re averaging 2 hours and 38 minutes on TikTok per day.

Of course you want to change your habits, but this desire fades when the habits feel a little inconvenient.

Instead of relying on motivation, you need to make a commitment to yourself.

We make commitments to our parents, friends, and colleagues all the time.

But why do we find it so difficult to make commitments to ourselves, and actually execute on them?

Start with the end goal in sight. Put aside the temporary suffering in exchange for the reward.

Make incremental changes in your day to day life — better known as habits.

After a few months of being an avid reader, it’ll start to feel so normal that you’ll feel like something’s missing if you miss a day of reading.

If there’s one thing you take away from this episode, it’s that doing hard shit makes you understand what you’re capable of.

I’m not saying you need to run an ultramarathon or sign up for Navy SEAL training.

But take this as a not-so-gentle reminder: every now and then you need to push yourself. Show yourself what you’re capable of.

The best things in life are waiting for you on the other side of your comfort zone. It’s up to you to build the willpower to go get them.

Thanks for listening. See you on the next episode of The Principle Podcast.

Thanks for listening to The Principle Podcast! Subscribe for free to receive new posts.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit theprinciplepodcast.substack.com

If you have even an ounce of good taste, you know exactly what movie this GIF is from:

Today’s episode isn’t about movies. Or your horrible taste in them.

It’s about taking a page out of Harvey Dent’s playbook, and making your own luck.

When someone puts their best foot forward, but things don’t work out in their favor, it’s obviously because luck wasn’t on their side.

When the same person achieves something great against all odds, luck had nothing to do with it!

“Luck is not something you can mention in the presence of self-made men.” - E. B. White

In reality, it’s most likely an indiscernible combination of persistence, hard work, skill, and of course, luck. Luck always plays a role.

So what, then, is luck?

Luck is actually a pretty difficult concept to define in a concise way, but here’s my best attempt:

Luck is a seemingly random meeting of circumstances that appears to make events happen by pure chance. It’s important to note that luck is neither inherently good nor bad.

Think back to the last few lucky circumstances you found yourself in. Did they involve any of these elements?

* Spontaneity

* Expression (putting yourself out there)

* Opportunity

What if I told you there was a way to maximize your potential for luck?

Let’s walk through the average 25 year old’s week:

Work a 9-5 Monday through Friday, order lunch from the Chipotle pickup app. Every night after work, either head home to watch Netflix until bed, or head to happy hour with college friends.

On weekends, spend a night out at the bar with the same friends. Watch HBO, do groceries, do laundry, and take care of other chores. Maybe spend some time with family.

Notice how during that week, there were almost zero opportunities for any of the three elements we talked about to manifest themselves.

Now, let’s mix things up a little and introduce those elements:

Work the same 9-5 Monday through Friday, but step out to a new restaurant for lunch every day. Strike up conversations with the people preparing your food.

Instead of watching Entourage for the 7th time, or hanging out with the same friends after work, maybe check out that new yoga class you heard about, go to a networking event, or, dare I say, go to dinner alone!

Over time, you’ll meet new people. Develop these relationships. Talk about your interests. Ask genuine questions about theirs.

Notice how drastically different those two weeks are. In the second scenario, you’ve introduced spontaneity, expression, and opportunity into your life.

For all the introverts out there, don’t forget how applicable these principles are due to the power of social media. Leverage Twitter, Reddit, and LinkedIn to connect with people.

In any case, your surface area for attracting luck has expanded massively. You might meet a new friend or business partner at one of the random galas you decide to attend.

And if not, at least you broke out of the monotony and introduced some variety into your life. There really is no downside to putting yourself out there.

There’s something to be said about randomness. Every now and then, dropping yourself into unfamiliar territory, exposing yourself to new ideas and thinkers. Randomness can inspire creativity in other parts of your life.

So next time you hear about an event in your city, but can’t find anyone to attend it with you, GO ALONE. You truly never know who you’ll meet.

Thanks for listening. See you on the next episode of The Principle Podcast.

Thanks for listening to The Principle Podcast! Subscribe for free to receive new posts.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit theprinciplepodcast.substack.com

February 17th. You’ve been waiting for this day for WEEKS, and it’s finally here.

You and your best friends are all packed and heading to the airport for your flight to Puerto Rico. Your five day adventure is within reach.

You can almost feel the warm Puerto Rican air on your skin as you step out of your Uber on this snowy Boston morning.

It’s 8:42 — plenty of time to grab some food before your 10 o’clock flight. You rush through TSA and get to your gate. As you sit down at the restaurant, you feel a faint vibration in your jacket pocket.

You slide your iPhone out of your pocket and glance down at the screen. You notice the distinct dark blue and royal red of the Fly Delta app. Oh no…

* BOS flight 2873 to SJU: updated departure time is 1:00 PM EST *

You gotta be kidding me. A 3-hour delay?!

There are two types of responses to situations like these:

* The pessimist: let this ruin my day and everyone else’s around me.

* The optimist: let me be irritated for five minutes and then move on.

We all know some pessimists. They complain about minor things. They dwell on the past. They try to explain why your brilliant idea “would never work!”

Instead, be the optimist.

Not only will you be a happier person by doing so, but I’ll also venture to say that being an optimist will make you far more likable.

And being likable is the most underrated skill you can develop.

Don’t believe me? Follow along with this thought exercise:

Meet Dawn

Dawn’s a former personal trainer who wants to change her career path. She’s spent the last 7 months teaching herself how to code and meeting people in the industry. She certainly has a long way to go, but isn’t afraid to put herself out there.

Meet Ron

Ron’s a Computer Science grad who’s been programming on his own for a couple months, so he’s got some experience under his belt. He too has been putting himself out there.

Ron and Dawn both attend the same Airbnb networking panel.

Ron spoke to a few employees about his programming knowledge. The conversations were strictly business.

Dawn asked intriguing questions and expressed her genuine interest in software, while acknowledging that she was still learning.

Unfortunately, Airbnb wasn’t looking to hire at the time.

Just a few months later, however, the company started planning new host features and needed to hire more young developers to help build them out.

Who do you think got a call?

Dawn left a lasting impression, and although she wasn’t a pro by any means, she left the team with the feeling that she was humble, coachable, and personable.

Your reputation stays with you, and is often the first thing people learn about you before they even meet you.

Before we wrap up, let me leave you with three observations.

Optimism > Pessimism

This is an easy one. Without repeating what I said earlier, the point here is that optimists lean towards finding solutions rather than complaining.

Even if they can’t find a solution, optimists learn to accept things as they are and roll with the punches.

Optimism should never be confused with living in fantasyland and being unrealistic, and Matt Ridley explains this concept very well in his book, The Rational Optimist.

Express gratitude

Be grateful for all those little things you take for granted.

Sure, getting stuck in traffic for half an hour this morning did suck, but don’t forget to be thankful for having a job in the first place.

Being an optimist is REALLY easy when you realize how fortunate you are.

Don’t take yourself too seriously

No, this doesn’t mean you always need to be agreeable. You’re allowed to have opinions and points of view.

Just find the humor in every day things. Be lighthearted.

Don’t let your ego keep you from having an open mind.

Thanks for listening. See you on the next episode of The Principle Podcast.

Thanks for listening to The Principle Podcast! Subscribe for free to receive new posts.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit theprinciplepodcast.substack.com

We commonly hear people say *life is short* when thinking about old memories.

In reality, life is, hopefully, pretty long.

A powerful concept to keep in the back of your mind is delayed gratification.

Simply put, delaying gratification means sacrificing a temporary high in exchange for a bigger reward in the future.

Consuming 17 nuggets from Chick-fil-A in one sitting, for example, might sound satisfying when you’re really hungry, but you won’t feel so great afterwards (trust me).

That’s probably not the most useful example when first hearing about this concept, so let’s discuss a few more examples that are actually relevant to your life today:

(1) Getting enough sleep on a consistent basis.

Flash back to your early twenties (or maybe, present day?) — work your ass off Monday through Thursday, and go out Thursday night through Saturday night.

Waking up each of the next mornings thinking about the crap you ate last night and feeling guilty. Being too exhausted and hungover the next day to do what you need to do. Missing workouts. The list goes on and on…

I’m not saying there’s ANYTHING wrong with going out and blowing off some steam. In fact, we all need some time with our friends to just enjoy life.

Just make sure that your leisure time isn’t interfering with your sleep too often. Find out what works best for you. After all, “sleep is the elixir of life” —Matt Walker:

(2) Earning a high up-front salary (early in your career) is simply a vanity metric.

Consider the following scenario:

Job A is for a small company that pays $42,000/year, but would allow you to have direct mentorship from someone who’s had major success in your field for years.

Job B is for a large enterprise that pays double that of Job A. You’d have access to fancy corporate perks and plenty of career stability.

In a vacuum, Job B seems like a total no-brainer. But I’m going to make the case for Job A that many people in our age group fail to realize:

Direct access to a successful mentor will allow you to develop a highly specialized skillset that will allow you make leaps and bounds in your career.

While Job B will make you monetarily richer today, Job A will allow you to build a skillset to multiply your wealth in a few years.

Job B is great for your ego, but not so great for your long-term growth.

As the GOAT Naval Ravikant says, “play long term games with long term people.”

The best things in life come from compound interest and focusing on building your specific knowledge.

(3) Living below your means.

Would you rather live in a shiny new apartment with a walkable commute in Battery Park City OR in a modest apartment with a short commute in FiDi?

Trick question — there’s no right answer. It really depends on your circumstance.

What I’m trying to get you to think about is how you can make reasonable sacrifices to live below your means.

While you certainly might be able to afford rent for that swanky new apartment in Battery Park, does it make sense to pay an additional $1,500/month to avoid a 15-minute commute?

The answer is obviously highly individual.

In short, pick your battles and find out how you can minimize your expenses on the dumb things so that you can spend whatever you want on the things you really like (like that $7 Starbucks coffee!).

Thanks for listening. See you on the next episode of The Principle Podcast.

Thanks for listening to The Principle Podcast! Subscribe for free to receive new posts.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit theprinciplepodcast.substack.com

You can learn something from every single person you meet. Welcome to The Principle Podcast.

This podcast is going to be series of conversations with interesting people from all walks of life.

Subscribe now to keep up with the latest guests.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit theprinciplepodcast.substack.com