video number 101 I'm feeling some you stress for reasons that I won't elaborate on now but we're back into talking about contacts notes that I made and they're a bit out of order because when I don't make videos for days and then typing notes I don't really keep track of any logical order that they go in per se and I was thinking about how context itself is sort of disorder it's like this greater expanse of information and then the content is something that we unfold from the context and we appoint as meaningful so there's infinite context but we are pulling from a very limited amount of the context so the context of the experiences that I've had is something different than the words trying to describe that context so even the words that are somewhat contextual or content extrapolated from the experience the context of the experience not just the experience itself not just describing the experience in terms of content but unfolding the implications as well and it seems to me that context is disordered in a way because it's not the order of the way our brains have been programmed to to see and make meaning of things but at the same time it's like a greater order in that it's an unfolded order it's an order that we haven't yet made meaning out of or seen any meaning in maybe that's part of it that meaningful domain wants us to see the meaning of the meaningful domain instead of keeping making the same meanings all the time because then it becomes meaning less because we start to not even perceive the things that were no longer making meaning out of and that's part of the learning process it's it's part of what is designed in our brain so we keep learning and oftentimes we replace that with the process of continuing to desire more and more things but really I think that redundancy processor that hedonic adaptation asst Jason Silva says in his videos is for us to keep learning but we've been told what to know and so we stopped learning become habits and we desire and desire more and more and more and more instead of learning which is innately fulfilling without needing to desire any particular thing and by desiring something in particular we're actually missing out on everything else that we could be perceiving but our little ego probe compass has put its little feelers out for something in particular that we think that we want and then often times when we get it where are we wanting the next thing so I think that pleasure desire process has taken over learning and actually part of my you stress right now has to do with desire in a way and and I can see that it's possible that this desire will block learning because of that very thing and not to say that desire is bad it's one part of the functionality of the spectrum of the kaleidoscope of tools we have within our brain through which to learn but it's the one that we've made dominant and when that one is over utilized it sort of crowds out those other capacities those other human dimensions so one dimension is desire perhaps and that takes over nearly everything and desire is tied into the me in the ego whereas the other human dimensions are tied more into world centricity and altruism and the common humanity and the connection and there are definite physical desires as in needs and then we extend those into mental desires through our image making process and I was talking about the little book of clarity by Jamie smart and he talked about implication based learning and I can't remember if I talked about how this process of context unfolding in self dialogue in a ways implication based learning because I'm reading between the lines of my experience and then also talking to myself and reading between the lines of talking to myself so I'm just seeing further and further possible implications and perhaps that's part of what dr. david bohm talks about the implicit order in the explicit order there's things that are implicit and there's things that are explicit so I wonder what the implications are creating diverse context versus the implications of just subscribing to the mainstream paradigm wonder of map consciousness is trying to crowd out ego consciousness it definitely crowds it out for a certain period of time and I wonder if context creation can sort of crowd out the amount of knowledge that I have about the mainstream paradigm I wonder if one day it'll just be a distant memory for me cuz right now i'm still in it yet i'm talking about things that are possibly outside of it but then maybe one day i'll be outside of it as well as talking about things outside of it and then not talking about things outside of it in reference to it not talking about it and that could be part of the game of map consciousness is seeing the implications going into that other state of consciousness where we see the implications we're super sensitive we can see those implications and perhaps since we're seeing the implications of things and we're actually acting based on the total pattern of perception of the implications the total pattern implications of what we're perceiving and where that could lead and what that means and and where that came from and and all these different extrapolations to infinity we become overwhelmed and behave in an apparent disordered way but we're reacting to a different order of reality that we can't all sense all the time we can see the implications and extrapolate and that's what crushes us that's what also elevates us at the beginning seeing the implications of love and then seeing the implications of hate and judgment and what are the implications of one person on a long-term medication treatment versus being able to transform and transcend and and move into a different path and I could say to myself that I have a psychotic disorder or it could say that I have an interesting and unique relationship with the universe sometimes I ride the roller coaster of the universe the roller coaster of the spectrum and scale of consciousness and I feel like the temporary incapacitation that happens during psychosis sometimes is a re-emerging capacitation it's emerging with different capacities just like a caterpillar goes into a chrysalis it's completely immobile and protected and safe and then emerges with completely different capacities and that stillness is required for the imaginal cells of our consciousness to rearrange our consciousness in such a way that we r e- capacities this ability shin aspect it's like the reset button on the computer and it's like how if you're doing maintenance on a machine you shut it down you don't try to work on it while it's moving around and I feel like the universe is rewriting our DNA and changing our epigenetic expression and I wrote down that or more controlled by the programs we feel like we have free will but free will is just the ego talking to itself about making decisions and that ego voice is our own voice turned against us and and it's programmed it's other thoughts and conditionings from society and then we call that choosing between one thought and another thought free will and map consciousness comes in and shows us more about true free well and I was thinking about how words block perception and another way it could in a way is that our words or sounds our voice even in our own head in our own voice it blocks the nervous system from fully perceiving in that those words are vibrating through all the nerves that is going through a whole nervous system electrically and those words vibrating through our nervous system are meaning that the nervous system isn't quiet it's not silent and so it can't actually accurately perceive the vibrations that are incoming because there is a vibration already happening in terms of our own voice and so a lot of what we are are perceiving gets blocked out by the fact that we're already having words happening in our nervous system and then it could be possible that it's blocking the EPI mimetics and the endo mimetics the voice of the universe speaking to us and speaking through us and and animating us as the voice of the universe not just the voice of one's personal ego programming and so it blocks perception one can't see actuality when words are a barrier to that and I wonder if there could be like a religion of human neurology developed from the principles from map consciousness and I feel like the principles are the principles of the human nervous system when it's not blocked by abstractions about reality when we're not abstracting about reality we're actually feeling it fully and we're more sensitive to it and it's more challenging to actually go about life and I'm really wondering if all this self dialogue will change what I tune in to next time I do go into map consciousness because I've never spent six months talking to myself about it and since i did go into that state known as psychosis three times in 14 months after the end of this month in a couple of weeks it'll be the longest I've gone without going into that state so it'll be interesting to see if I can stay out of that state beyond eight months to a year to two years to three years I wonder if I can feel like oh the universe is just on my case again I wrote something down about I don't really know what I was talking about but something along the lines of psychosis as getting to this point where one is trying to run away from thought in terms of actually running away physically or having behaviors that are labeled sa paranoia which is like almost running wanting to run away or wanting to hide it's like trying to run away and hide from the collective consciousness of of thought so it's one thing to have a fearful thought and then push it away with another thought that's a form of running away from a fearful thought but as it gets more and more accumulated one actually is literally running away from the projections of the collective unconsciousness not just linear projected thoughts of one's own personal into that individuality and it's actually seen and taken personal when it's gotten to the point of say thinking somebody's after oneself in a way thought is after us it's not us and we usually identify with our thoughts and so going into psychosis is just an extreme form is identifying with thoughts and then these thoughts seem more unreasonable to people who are observing from the outside but those very people have a very similar process going on in their mind that could easily get to the point where it's also supposedly out of control and that could be part of it Krishnamurti says the controller is the controlled so normally we are controlling our thoughts and we feel like we're controlling them but that's just another thought controlling it so it's just one thought after another and and one thought the thought prior sort of takes this position of I'm the one that created that next thought and so I'm controlling it but maybe when that process breaks down to some extent the thoughts get out of control and they start to pile up and then one feels like they're not in control of their thoughts and when that happens it can sort of instead of just going from like one bad thought to learn good thought from one bad thought to one good thought when there's no controller it can go from bad thought too bad to worse to worse to build up to build up to all of a sudden the whole world is ending when really maybe it's the world of thought getting to the very end of it and over time we've evolutionarily we have the reflex to say jump away from a snake well in psychosis so-called psychosis it's like we're running away from some bigger scarier thing but it's all sort of an image in our minds and I'm not saying that's wrong it's sort of a natural consequence of the original process which is actually seen as healthy and that original process is never questioned it seems like it's a reflex to get away from thought because in in mania one is sort of getting away from thought and going into that collective beauty in up the levels of consciousness and as one starts to come down the levels of consciousness one starts to experience more and more thoughts and their thoughts that weren't identified originally with the person who's experiencing them so then they seem like something other but it's actually showing us the consequence of thought in general and then the mania is showing us what happens when there's less thought and more light of consciousness and awareness one sees the whole accumulated thought structure and starts to run and there was an article that I read about the cost of something I don't know what it was like say sitting or something like that and I wonder what the cost of habitual condition thinking is of our regular ego thought process and there's a lot more research right now about things like the flow state and it's some semi elusive state and difficult to get into what if that's our natural way to be and we're supposed to be in that state ninety-five percent of time and and user ego consciousness say five percent of time but really that's happening to the opposite extent so what is the cost of that and a lot of certain things they do studies about that have costs associated with it we never actually studied the level of thinking behind what that behavior is and in a way so called psychosis is like the universe thinking through us for us and it's not always a welcome thing but it's definitely a different type of thinking and it produces different types of behavior and so map consciousness is the design of the universe to make sure we don't get stuck in habitual patterns that are going to lead us towards destruction it tries to help us to explore other modes and ways and behaviors and gestures of being just as children do and we're inner explorers where I thought of the term astral knots they talk about psychonauts as people who take psychoactive substances but it's almost like astronauts they talk about the astral plane I don't really know much about that but I just thought astronauts was kind of a funny word I even think that consciousness is the type of consciousness medicine and at a certain dose it can be poisonous and lethal bite at us at but at the right dose it can be healing and just as when a one has a fever one needs to rest when one has map consciousness there could be a rest period that's needed as well it's sort of like a natural mechanism just like a fever and just as a fever is designed to kill off the organisms the microorganisms that aren't beneficial to our system I feel like map consciousness is supposed to kill off some of the thoughts and thinking that is not beneficial to our mental consciousness system and part of the medicine of map consciousness is that a person might come back with medicinal messages so it not only kills off the bad thoughts some of the time it can create some new endo memes and epi memes that might be medicinal for the person in terms of maybe past things that needed to be integrated and just as it's actually important for children to have the common childhood diseases in order to build their immune system for later life it could be important for people to go into map consciousness in order to build this sort of immunity to being caught in habit or being caught in conformity or rigidity

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