Why do we keep repeating relationship patterns that no longer serve us?

In this episode of Psychology, Actually, Dr Marianne Trent is joined by fellow Clinical Psychologist Dr Kate Sherratt to explore attachment, relational patterns, dating psychology, burnout, self-esteem and why our earliest relationships can quietly shape the way we navigate adult life.From people-pleasing and emotional shutdown… to burnout at work, dating “catnip”, anxious attachment and struggling to ask for needs to be met - this conversation explores the hidden relational patterns that often sit underneath our everyday struggles.

⏱️ Timestamps

• 00:00 Why relationship problems often begin long before dating
• 01:14 What are relational patterns?
• 02:46 Burnout and old emotional patterns
• 05:30 Formulation and understanding your “user manual”
• 07:09 Protector patterns and emotional self-reliance
• 09:14 Supervision, attachment and criticism sensitivity
• 11:10 Why praise sometimes doesn’t go in
• 14:49 Building healthier self-esteem
• 16:30 Dating, consistency and emotional safety
• 17:25 Attachment theory and dating patterns
• 20:04 Dating “icks”, red flags and emotional catnip
• 22:29 Love bombing and unhealthy intensity
• 23:34 People-pleasing in relationships
• 26:27 What does a healthy relationship actually look like?
• 28:46 Deal breakers, values and emotional safety
• 30:51 Why emotional catnip can keep you stuck
• 33:36 Inner Work and deeper reflections

Links:

📲 Connect with Dr Kate Sherratt here: https://www.instagram.com/drkate.psychologist https://www.drkatesherratt.com

🫶 To join my podcast membership to get early access to episodes and / or exclusive weekly content head to: https://the-aspiring-psychologist.captivate.fm/support or to the Apple Podcasts App: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-aspiring-psychologist-podcast/id1605628278 or to YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOwjrIP_jatiqlAivJE2mgQ/join

📚 To check out The Clinical Psychologist Collective Book: https://amzn.to/3jOplx0

📖 To check out The Aspiring Psychologist Collective Book: https://amzn.to/3CP2N97

💡 To check out or join the aspiring psychologist membership for just £30 per month head to: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/membership

🖥️ Check out my short courses for aspiring psychologists and mental health professionals here: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/online-courses

Ask Marianne your most pressing psychology career question and she will send you a FREE bespoke reply! Grab your free psychology success guide here and fill in the most pressing concern box: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk (scroll to the bottom of the page)

✍️ Get your FREE Supervision Shaping Tool now: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/free-resources

📱Connect socially with Marianne and check out ways to work with her, including the Aspiring Psychologist Book, Clinical Psychologist book and The Aspiring Psychologist Membership on her Link tree: https://linktr.ee/drmariannetrent

💬 To join my free Facebook group and discuss your thoughts on this episode and more: https://www.facebook.com/groups/aspiringpsychologistcommunity

Like, Comment, Subscribe & get involved:

If you enjoy the podcast, please do subscribe and rate and review episodes.

Hashtags:

#datingpsychology #attachmentstyles #attachment #relationalpatterns

Mentioned in this episode:

Sponsored by WriteUpp Smart Import

This episode is sponsored by WriteUpp. One of my favourite features is Smart Import, which allows client information from intake forms to populate securely into the system with a single click. Use code MARIANNE30 for a free 30-day trial and 30% off your first 6 months.

Sponsored by WriteUpp Smart Import

This episode is sponsored by WriteUpp. One of my favourite features is Smart Import, which allows client information from intake forms to populate securely into the system with a single click. Use code MARIANNE30 for a free 30-day trial and 30% off your first 6 months.