The Query

More than any other time in the year, the holiday season forces us to reckon with what's missing in our lives and to face what we may have managed to avoid: grief. The experiences of losing loved ones, relationships, jobs, finances, security, our sense of self, and physical or mental capabilities, can swallow us whole, leaving us raw and vulnerable to feelings and emotions of devastation and profound sadness. So, how do we take care of ourselves and others as we grieve? And where do we begin?

REFERENCES / CREDITS:

Music: Burning by Tri-Tachyon

Producer: Oleksandr Hedz

CONNECT:

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Email: [email protected]

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Family relationships are full of complexities and unique dynamics. Combining elements of stress, anxiety, toxic emotions, unresolved trauma, addiction, and grief to holiday gatherings, often exacerbate and deepen existing complexities and trigger emotional wounds. We discuss supportive steps to manage and move through trigger-filled holidays in ways we can feel safe and whole in the presence of loved ones–and more importantly, long after we bid farewell.

REFERENCES / CREDITS:

Feelings Chart. Baton Rouge Counseling

The Language of Letting Go: Hazelden Meditation Series. Melody Beattie

Dysfunctional Family Bingo. Best Game Plan for Gatherings: Find Allies, Structure Time, Get in the Mindset

Home for the Holidays: Tips for overcoming holiday anxiety and stress. R Morgan Griffin

Music: Burning by Tri-Tachyon

Producer: Oleksandr Hedz

CONNECT:

Website: The Query Podcast

Facebook: The Query Podcast

Email: [email protected]

Rate us on iTunes Podcasts or PlayerFM

SUBSCRIBE TO THE QUERY PODCAST:

The Query Podcast on iTunes

The podcast app for Android that we recommend (Player FM)

The Query Podcast on Player FM

"Either you understand how shame operates in your life, or it operates your life." - Brene Brown Is the experience of shame a choice? Can shame be disempowered when we choose not to be trapped, powerless and isolated? In a continuation of our last episode where we outlined shame, we introduce Shame Resilience: a practice with tools to engage feelings of empathy, connection, power, and freedom. We also discuss the gender divide in how shame and resilience is explored differently between men and women.

IN THIS EPISODE YOU'LL FIND MORE ABOUT:

• The elements of Shame Resilience
• Practical, self-supporting ways to disengage shame
• Specific resilience tools for men
• The cost of being out of shame
• Why "it's hard" is not a valid excuse
• The importance of examining our unconscious and conscious relationships with shame
• How identifying specific thoughts, feelings, emotions and belief systems are essential to shame resilience
• Moderating resilience through planning and practice
• Creating safe connections with others

REFERENCES / CREDITS:

Guided Meditations. Tara Brach

Shame Resilience Theory by Brene Brown (video and readings). Habits for Wellbeing

Shame Shields. The Armor We Use to Protect Ourselves and Why It Doesn't Serve Us. Linda Hartling

Messages of Shame Are Organized Around Gender. Anthony Hinds

Open Path Psychotherapy Collective – Therapy Directory

Music: Burning by Tri-Tachyon

Producer: Oleksandr Hedz

CONNECT:

Website: The Query Podcast

Facebook: The Query Podcast

Email: [email protected]

Rate us on iTunes Podcasts or PlayerFM

SUBSCRIBE TO THE QUERY PODCAST:

The Query Podcast on iTunes

The podcast app for Android that we recommend (Player FM)

The Query Podcast on Player FM

When you think of shame and guilt, what is the first thing that comes to mind? Are they attached to a story? Has the story been holding you hostage; zapping your life of vitality creativity, and joy? As shame cannot live amongst words, today we expose shame through unpacking and examining the baggage of hurt, anger, loneliness, regret, disappointment, humiliation, embarrassment, fear and unforgiveness, that we attach to our identities.

We discuss how this emotion can be transformed by reexamining our thinking, and owning our power to reframe and recreate our stories.

IN THIS EPISODE YOU'LL FIND MORE ABOUT:

• Distinctions between shame and guilt

• How to know when shame is happening

• Cognitive and physiological responses to shame

• The danger of comparison

• The essentialness of creative expression to authenticity and vitality

• Strategies of disconnection

• How we collect and share shame with others

• How we distort our relationships because of shame

• Owning our power to choose

• Reframing experiences and stories attached to shame

• Our individual shame stories and how we recovered

REFERENCES / CREDITS:

Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead — Brené Brown

Listening to shame — Brené Brown

The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom — Don Miguel Ruiz

Music: Burning by Tri-Tachyon

Producer: Oleksandr Hedz

CONNECT:

Facebook: The Query Podcast

Email: [email protected]

Rate us on iTunes Podcasts or PlayerFM

SUBSCRIBE TO THE QUERY PODCAST:

The Query Podcast on iTunes

The podcast app for Android that we recommend (Player FM)

The Query Podcast on Player FM

Is social equality an achievable or desirable goal? Statistics in 2016 showed that 4 out of 10 African-Americans said they doubt the nation will ever achieve racial equality but as many white Americans believed it has been achieved. In this episode, we ask ourselves is this too much to think about or is it worth fighting for?

IN THIS EPISODE YOU'LL FIND MORE ABOUT

What is social equality?

The different ways in which people of color self-identify.

The unpopular message of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. before his execution.

Are we returning back to the middle age?

Is there a way forward?

Why Manaz is tired of it all.

REFERENCES/CREDITS

On Views of Race and Inequality, Blacks and Whites Are Worlds Apart - Pew Research Center

Study Shows Blacks Will NEVER Gain Wealth Parity With Whites Under the Current System - Black Agenda Report

Music: Burning by Tri-Tachyon

Producer: Oleksandr Hedz

CONTACT US:

[email protected]

SUBSCRIBE TO THE QUERY PODCAST:

The Query Podcast on iTunes

The podcast app for Android that we recommend (Player FM)

The Query Podcast on Player FM

With this being our first episode, we, Manaz and Melinda, introduce ourselves, how we met, and why we began this podcast. Deeper in, we discuss race in construct, intention and deception. We strongly believe separation is an illusion we keep returning to and we're willing to talk about it.

IN THIS EPISODE YOU'LL FIND MORE ABOUT

Our working definitions of 'white and race'.

How race identification was constructed.

Why white people in largely segregated communities don't tap into the pool of rage and hurt.

What race was intended to do and be?

How avoiding conversations about race is connected to avoidance in other areas of our lives.

The deception of race.

REFERENCES/CREDITS

I Am Not Your Negro - James Baldwin

James Baldwin and the Meaning of Whiteness - Common Dreams

Construct of Race - PBS

Peculiar Institution: Slavery in the Ante-Bellum South - Kenneth Stamp

The People's History of the United States - Howard Zinn

Music: Burning by Tri-Tachyon

Producer: Oleksandr Hedz - PodcastAssistant.net

CONTACT US:

[email protected]

SUBSCRIBE TO THE QUERY PODCAST:

The Query Podcast on iTunes

The podcast app for Android that we recommend (Player FM)

The Query Podcast on Player FM