Welcome to phone calls with rach- a new series where rachel records her phone call (with permission) and then explains something so heinous to a friend (in this case, hailey.)

If you don't laugh along with us then I'm sorry for your loss <3

Thank you so much for your patience throughout my unplanned hiatus. I love the pod deeply but haven't had the time to edit. Truly truly I am so thankful for this silly little creative outlet and my precious friends for joining me. If you want to come on, just text me :)

Because of the 2 month break, I'm making this episode 1 of season 2!!! Meaning is what you make it!!

A few alternate titles for this ep:

Redemption Island with Hailey

“How are you getting paid? ghost money?”

“who said that? bill clinton?”

“he swirled his tongue around her mouth apparently”

“hilaria baldwin takes up so much space in my brain”

“channing tatum is my coworker’s second cousin or something”

“i need to clean my toilet, someone grab ty pennington from extreme makeover home edition”

“everyone loves him, they foam at the mouth and make him an omega in the omega verse.

”“i don’t think bindi irwin deserves my 8 year old vitriol”

“i have no desire to fix any man, so i really respect that in you

“why is he so cute? he also did commit a genocide”

join chriss and rachel for an in-depth analysis on things most people would never put any cognitive capacity toward. ALSO get a look into our twisted minds (our most recent dreams) as well as our whimsical spirits and loving hearts.

If you like the pod despite the "ums" and "likes" please let Kerrygold Butter and Mario_TrainFan know!! Ok, love you, bye <3

today we are joined by bethany trainer, a woman who i pay to be my friend while she tells me to pick up and put down heavy things :)

together, we dive into the serious issues of bullying, homeschooling, and how deeps lies can go (when pranking those around you.) if you or a loved one has been affected by delinquents playing pranks, please let us know in a review. our hearts go out to you <3

today, I am joined by the one and only Paul, founder of Paul's Garden Service in Greenville, SC.

don't let the fact that he's a businessman fool you into thinking this won't be a very silly ep. dive into a world of whimsy, laughs, and Paul bullying our close good friend, Mattie <3

on today's pod we are joined by the little but fierce, emma, her future opera singer baby, and friend of the show, mattie to discuss the ups and downs of the full spectrum of life experiences one can have.

to quote Mr. Worldwide (Pitbull) "This for everybody going through tough times. Believe me, been there, done that but every day above ground is a great day, remember that."

important background on me: 7 year old rachel was chosen to sing a solo of Somewhere Over the Rainbow as a child and since then has thought that she must have had some sort of prodigy-like talent for performance. Because of this, a local theater production of Wizard of Oz in 4th grade, and an obsession with the Wicked soundtrack, she (this is me if you haven't figured it out yet) is the perfect person to give you a WoZ rundown and some light context of Wicked with NO SPOILERS.

Anyway, rachel (me) expects 3 listeners for this episode.... good thing it took an hour of recording and more of editing :)

<3

Here's the deal: I wanted to test out my new mic, so Mattie graciously jumped on a call while she was on a walk. I sound a bit more subdued/chill/relaxed/zen in this episode because I was getting used to speaking into a mic.

ANYWAYYYYYYYY, if you're looking for an informative podcast about all the books in town, keep looking! This is far less structured and more stream of consciousness.=

Listeners, please note: I didn't completely dominate the conversation with Mattie this time!! 2025 will indeed be a year of growth and self betterment :)

Oopsie, there was an error in editing right before the 30 minute mark. I am aware and I will probably make the same mistake in the future <3

shout out to my muse, Kelly! She has not listened to a single episode and I also have not seen her in at least a month. Alas, the show goes on.

Counselor in training, Annie joins us today to tell me what's wrong with me (jk, she is in training and it is for entertainment purposes only. None of this should be taken seriously.)

Listen the whole way through to find all the easter eggs we hid for you ;)

OK, love you, bye!

Thank you to my close good friend, Hailey, for chatting with me! Would you believe I edited FORTY minutes of content out of this??? So, before you complain about how long it is, just set it to 1.25 speed and thank me for cutting out all that I did. :)

If you long for conversations that do not follow Freytag's Pyramid/basic story structure, then this is the episode for you!! We had a beginning, but the middle and end simply refused to appear. Rising action? Never heard of her.

What a gift it is to have deep friendships that transcend the intelligible. <3