Good evening, sinners. It is I—your boss, your ruler, the Titan of Terror, the Foreman of Fear, the Sultan of Sin. And tonight, I’m here to set the record straight about one of history’s most *spectacular* meltdowns:
**The Salem Witch Trials.**
Spoiler alert: I wasn’t even there.

In this episode, we’ll dive into:
🩸 How a few attention-hungry girls sparked a town-wide moral breakdown
⚖️ The ridiculous "trials" that made Medieval logic look like rocket science
👻 The laughable use of “spectral evidence” (a.k.a. dream gossip) in court
🔥 And how you humans managed to destroy lives *without* my help

While I was busy watching nobles poison each other in Europe, Salem, Massachusetts went full chaos mode, accusing bakers, widows, and women with *too many cats* of being witches. No demons required—just fear, hypocrisy, and pure human ignorance.

And if you think we’ve outgrown that level of stupidity? Think again.

If you're into **dark humor**, **real history**, and **sinfully sharp storytelling**, then pull up a chair, crack open a beer, and welcome to damnation.

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