Hello and welcome to today’s episode where we uncover The Secret to Lasting Change. What makes change so hard, and what little steps can make a big difference? Today we’re unpacking a topic that hits close to home for a lot of us: Why Goals and Resolutions Fail and What to Do Instead?

You know, every January we’re all fired up with resolutions. But here’s an interesting fact: over 80% of those resolutions vanish within a week—just one week. If change were as simple as wishing for wealth, fitness, or happiness, wouldn’t we all be living that dream? So why does the road to change feel like an uphill battle?

Well, there are many reasons this can be the case.

The Power of Decision

And as we explore these reasons, let me begin by giving you the secret right up front: there is a difference between setting a goal or resolution versus making a decision. Let me explain.

Lasting change begins with a decision, which is very different than setting a goal or hoping something will happen “if it all works out.”

A decision is a firm conviction to the desired result. It is resolve, doing whatever it takes because you have already declared it is so by your decision. This is exactly the kind of resolve you need when trying to change, whether in your personal life, your business, your relationships, in every aspect of your life.

Once you make the decision, placing that stake in the ground that says, “this is” and start down that path, life has a way of leading you to those things which are needed to achieve the results. But the key is not to give up until the results are achieved, even when there are setbacks or course correction is required.

A decision tells the universe that this is already a fact and it is just a matter of moving through time and space to see it manifest. Then the universe can help arrange the people, places and resources you need for its fulfillment.

The Power of Our Habits

Now, if you find it difficult to make a decision vs. setting a goal, let’s look at a few reasons why you might find it so hard to make the changes you desire or to have the resolve required.

Let’s start with our habits. Imagine waking up every morning and following the same routine, taking the same route to work, or even thinking the same thoughts you had yesterday. Chances are, you have far more habits than you realize. Whether it’s the comfort of a familiar snack when you’re bored or texting the same friends day in and day out—these habits are like autopilot for our brains.

Here’s the kicker though: habits are our brain’s way of saving energy. Every decision you don’t have to make frees up mental space. So, when you try to change, your brain puts up a fight. It says, “Hey, we’ve been doing this forever, and it’s kept you safe!” And that’s why, even when you know a new behavior could really benefit you, your old habits tend to win most of the time unless you have that resolve.

The Uncomfortable Side of Change

Now, let’s talk about discomfort. Changing isn’t like switching lanes on a highway; it’s more like trying to steer a big, heavy ship through choppy waters. We all know what we need to do—lose a few pounds, maybe switch up our career paths—but the actions required to make those changes can feel downright uncomfortable.

Our brains are wired for survival and sticking with what’s familiar—even if it’s not perfect. It feels safer than venturing into the unknown. In other words, even if you’re not thrilled with your current situation, the thought of facing uncertainty can be scarier than enduring a bit of discomfort. And some people just don’t want to experience any discomfort even if it might mean having a significantly better life.

Past Attempts and Self-Doubt

If you’ve ever tried to change something about your life and then stumbled, of course, you’re definitely not alone. But repeated setbacks can lead to that nagging feeling, “Maybe I’m just not built for change.” It’s a rough cycle—each failed attempt makes you more hesitant to try again.

But here’s something to keep in mind: the key isn’t in making giant leaps overnight. It’s about realizing that change is a journey, not a one-time event. If you’ve ever looked back at your life, you might be surprised at how much you’ve grown—even if it seemed like nothing was happening day to day.

A Friendly Guide to Change

So, how can we make change feel a bit less daunting? Here are a few friendly tips:

Make the Decision: As already mentioned, if you are willing to “give it a try,” there is a very good chance that when the first setback or obstacle appears, you will give up. Make a firm commitment to yourself with resolve. If you need to change direction or adjust your decision as you learn, then do so. But enter into change, whether great or small, with resolve.

This reminds me of the decision my husband and I made 16 years ago to move to Ecuador in South America, where we spend much of our time between numerous trips back and forth to the States. Some of our friends couldn’t believe we made such a decision and they would say, “What if you don’t like it?” Our answer: “Then we’ll do something else.”

Be Prepared: Understand that change can be tough. Plan ahead, know that you’re likely to face challenges, and remind yourself that every step forward is progress.

Start Small: Instead of overhauling your life overnight, try making tiny adjustments. For instance, if you want to meditate more, start with just two minutes a day. Small habits can snowball into big results over time.

And Have Patience: Changing habits isn’t a 30-day magic trick—it could take weeks or even months. Trust the process and give yourself grace as you adjust.

And Embrace the Discomfort: This is a big one. Yes, change can be scary. Accept that there will be some growing pains, but remember, every bit of discomfort is a sign that you’re moving forward.

Expect Setbacks: It’s totally normal to slip up. Aim for progress, not perfection. Even if you’re only 90% consistent, that’s still a win.

Before we wrap up today’s episode, I want you to imagine this: If you committed to making a tiny change each week, how transformative could your life be over the years? Think back to the small shifts you’ve already experienced without even noticing—and give slow, steady change a real chance.

That’s all for today’s episode. I hope you found some comfort in knowing that change is hard for all of us, but by taking it one step at a time and keeping the vision of the end result and trusting the universe to respond to your resolve, it’s absolutely possible.

Thanks for tuning in, and until next time, remember: Be kind to yourself on your journey of change.

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