What does it actually mean for a society to protect women, and why does that protection so often seem conditional?

Nik and Nhi begin with discussing a TikTok video of a woman documenting her pregnancy in South Korea, where expectant mothers can receive government-supported benefits and accommodations. That leads to a bigger question: if societies are willing to invest in women once they become pregnant, what are they doing to make women feel safe, supported, and autonomous before motherhood, or whether they become mothers at all?

Using South Korea’s 4B Movement as a starting point, the conversation expands across cultures and systems. Nik and Nhi discuss gender-based violence, cultural expectations around marriage and motherhood, sexual assault and the justice system, abortion and reproductive autonomy, and the ways women navigate safety in countries including South Korea, Vietnam, Haiti, and the United States.

They also explore anger, accountability, and what justice can mean when institutions fail, and turn toward healthcare to examine the responsibility providers carry when caring for people at their most vulnerable.

At the center of the conversation is one question: Do our systems actually value women, or only certain roles women are expected to fill?

Content note: This episode includes discussion of sexual assault, child sexual abuse, gender-based violence, abortion, reproductive rights, and mental-health crises.

Resources & References

Books

• Pedagogy of the Oppressed by Paulo Freire
• Reproductive Justice: An Introduction by Loretta Ross and Rickie Solinger.
• Hood Feminism by Mikki Kendall
• Entitled: How Male Privilege Hurts Women by Kate Manne
• Killing the Black Body by Dorothy Roberts

Podcasts/Further Listening

• The Briefing- The 4B Movement is going viral...What is it? episode.
• Throughline "After Roe: A New Battlefield" Episode.
• Looking Back, Moving Forward "Inside the Feminist Fight to Reclaim Our Reproductive Freedom" Episode.

Website Links

• UN Women — Global Database on Violence Against Women and Girls
• World Health Organization — Violence Against Women
• SisterSong — Reproductive Justice

What does it cost women to simply say no?

In this week's episode on The Soft Parts, Nik and Nhi have an honest conversation about women’s safety, bodily autonomy, rejection, and the everyday calculations women make while moving through the world.

The conversation begins with a recent experience Nhi had in Seattle, where a stranger’s reaction to being told "no" quickly escalated into following and unwanted physical contact. From there, Nik and Nhi reflect on their own experiences with street harassment, dating, rideshares safety, unwanted touching, workplace and academic power dynamics, healthcare, digital privacy, and the unsettling reality that seemingly ordinary interactions can change without warning.

They also explore the emotional cost that often goes unnoticed: hypervigilance, fear, secondary trauma, learning to anticipate someone else’s reaction before setting a boundary, and even becoming less open or friendly because kindness can be mistaken for access. The conversation asks why women are so often expected not only to protect themselves, but also to manage other people’s feelings about being denied access to them.

Because disappointment is yours to regulate.

No one is entitled to your attention, your body, your kindness, your access, or your yes.

**Content note: This episode includes discussion of sexual harassment, sexual violence, coercive behavior, stalking, unwanted touching, workplace misconduct, and violence.

Supportive Resources:

Want to learn more or find support? Here are some resources that might help.

Safety looks different for everyone. These resources are meant to offer information, options, and support, not to place responsibility on anyone experiencing harassment, abuse, stalking, or violence to prevent another person’s behavior.

Use what you find useful, leave the rest.

Useful Books:

• ​Men Who Hate Women - Laura Bates
• ​Fix the System, Not the Women - Laura Bates
• ​Know My Name -Chanel Miller
• ​The Gift of Fear - Gavin de Becker

Websites:

• ​RAINN - Safety Planning for Assault, Harassment & Stalking. Practical guidance for thinking through safety when dealing with harassment, stalking, sexual violence, or someone whose behavior is making you feel unsafe. Remember safety planning is about increasing options, not making women responsible for someone else’s behavior.
• ​NNEDV Safety Net Project - Technology Safety & Privacy. Their resources cover technology-facilitated abuse, device and account privacy, location tracking, evidence preservation, and safer technology use.
• ​SPARC - Stalking Prevention, Awareness & Resource Center. For anyone dealing with repeated unwanted contact, following, threats, or behavior they aren't sure qualifies as stalking. They have safety-planning resources, risk information, a stalking victim handbook, and an incident and behavior documentation log people can use to keep records.
• ​WomensLaw - Safety Planning & Legal Information. Useful for those who want to understand their options after stalking, harassment, or abuse/technology-facilitated abuse. It includes safety-planning guidance as well as state-specific legal information and resources for documenting digital evidence.
• ​Right To Be - Harassment & Bystander Intervention. Their "5Ds of Bystander InterventionDistract, Delegate, Document, Delay, and Direct" gives people concrete ways to help someone experiencing harassment while keeping safety and escalation risk in mind.
• ​HHS Office for Civil Rights - Health Information Privacy Rights & Complaints. HHS explains patients' federal health-information privacy rights and provides the official process for filing a complaint when someone believes a HIPAA-regulated organization violated those rights.

What if you could know whether you and your partner carried genetic risks that could affect your future child before having children? Would you want to know and what would you do with that information?

In Episode 8 of The Soft Parts, we start with a question about genetic compatibility and end up somewhere much bigger: What does it actually mean to choose parenthood responsibly?

We unpack genetic testing, disability, reproductive choice, abortion, designer babies, eugenics, and the ethical line between having more information and trying to control exactly who a child becomes. The conversation also turns toward dating with intention, choosing a compatible partner, physical versus emotional safety, cultural expectations around relationships, and the responsibilities parents take on long before a child is ever born.

At the center of it all is one uncomfortable question: Does the ability to reproduce mean you should?

As always, there are tangents, disagreements, questionable analogies involving asthmatic lions, and plenty of opinions we refuse to soften.

What does it mean to become the person your younger self dreamed of? Someone you're proud of?

In this episode, Nik and Nhi reflect on the people they've become, the versions of themselves they've had to leave behind, and the experiences that shaped who they are today. From moving across the country and finding independence to navigating relationships, family expectations, and cultural identity, they explore how growth often requires uncomfortable conversations, stronger boundaries, and the courage to stop making yourself smaller for the comfort of others.

This is a conversation about choosing authenticity over approval, learning to trust yourself, and discovering that the right people won't ask you to become less of who you are.

Growth isn't always about becoming someone entirely new, sometimes it's about allowing yourself to become who you were always meant to be.

Whether you're navigating adulthood, redefining relationships, or simply wondering who you're becoming, this episode is a reminder that growth isn't about becoming someone new, it's about finally becoming yourself.

Resources:

Books

• The Gifts of Imperfection — Brené Brown
• Set Boundaries, Find Peace — Nedra Glover Tawwab
• Attached — Amir Levine & Rachel Heller

🎙️ Continue the Conversation

• Episode 3: Chosen Family, Real Friendships
• Episode 5: Children Deserve More Than the Bare Minimum

Bigfoot is minding his business. The Earth is round. But some institutions have given us very valid reasons to ask, “Now what the hell is going on here?”

In this episode, we tumble headfirst into the rabbit hole of conspiracy theories. We start with a suspicious soccer match and somehow make our way through hidden cancer cures, Big Pharma, cannabis criminalization, prison labor, vaccines and autism, flat-earthers, the Tuskegee Syphilis Study, MKUltra, torture, the human capacity for evil, porn, political hypocrisy, Lindsey Graham’s alleged extracurricular activities, and whether everyone deserves a second chance.

You know, just a little light conversation.

Along the way, we explore why mysteries feel so satisfying, why problem-solving can become addictive, and why some people would rather keep digging than accept the official explanation. We also ask what happens when suspicion is not born from nowhere. Because while some conspiracy theories fall apart the second you introduce gravity or basic evidence, history has also shown us that governments and powerful institutions have lied, experimented on people, withheld treatment, protected profits, and caused real harm.

We disagree about whether humans are inherently evil or simply capable of doing evil things, discuss the difference between healthy skepticism and becoming completely detached from reality, and call out the very special kind of hypocrisy that comes from publicly condemning what you privately consume.

As always, we’re unscripted, unapologetic, occasionally unhinged, and full of opinions we are more than willing to be challenged on. Come down the rabbit hole with us, but please bring evidence. And maybe snacks.

Then tell us: What conspiracy theory do you believe has more truth to it than people admit, and what evidence, if any, could change your mind?

Follow us on our socials. Listen, share, and join the conversation at NikandNhi.art.

Want to Learn More? Start Here.

• The U.S. Public Health Service Untreated Syphilis Study at Tuskegee — CDC

• Project MKUltra — CIA Reading Room

• Vaccines and Autism — World Health Organization

• Is the Earth Round? — NOAA

• Mass Incarceration: The Whole Pie 2026 — Prison Policy Initiative

Food, clothing, and a roof over a child’s head are necessary, but parenting asks for more than simply keeping a child alive. Children also need emotional safety, guidance, discipline, protection, opportunity, and adults who are willing to examine what they may be passing down.

In this episode, we have an honest and passionate conversation about the responsibility that comes with raising children. Drawing from Nik’s experiences as a therapist and Nhi’s experience helping care for and raise the children who came after her, we reflect on how parenting choices can shape a person’s identity, relationships, emotional well-being, and understanding of the world.

We explore generational trauma, financial and emotional readiness for parenthood, the difference between discipline and punishment, and the ways religion, culture, family expectations, and personal values are passed from one generation to the next. We also discuss foster care, adoption, bodily autonomy, and the difficult ethical questions that arise when we consider what children deserve, and what society owes them.

This conversation also turns toward adult children and the expectations placed on them. Does providing the basic necessities entitle a parent to lifelong loyalty, forgiveness, access, or care? And what happens when the people responsible for protecting a child are also the ones who caused the harm?

Neither of us has children of our own, and we are not claiming to have every answer. But we both believe that bringing a child into the world carries an enormous responsibility, and that children deserve more than survival.

We’d love to hear your thoughts. Join the conversation at nikandnhi.art and let us know:

Which part of parenting do you think people underestimate most?

We'd love to hear your thoughts!

Belonging can be dangerous. And sometimes the people we trust to keep us safe can end up being the ones we need to be kept safe from. 

In this episode, we reflect on a recent tragedy that sparked a much larger conversation about friendship, belonging, identity, and what it means to feel safe with the people around us. We explore how our relationships shape us, the importance of surrounding ourselves with people who genuinely have our best interests at heart, and the ways race, community, and lived experiences influence how we move through the world.

This conversation also became a deeply personal one. We share our own experiences growing up, learning to embrace our identities, finding community, and wrestling with what it means to trust others while still protecting ourselves.

While the specific case discussed was still under investigation at the time of recording, this episode is ultimately about something much bigger: how we choose the people we let into our lives, and how those relationships can shape our sense of safety, belonging, and self.

We’d love to hear your thoughts. Join the conversation and let us know:

What makes someone feel truly safe to you?

**Note: This conversation was recorded while the case discussed was still under active investigation. Our goal is not to report the news, but to explore the broader themes the story raised for us. We encourage listeners to follow reputable news sources for verified updates as the investigation continues. And while this conversation begins with a news story, it ultimately explores the broader themes of trust, belonging, friendship, identity, and psychological safety.

Our thoughts are with Nolan Wells' s Family at this time.

This week, we’re talking about friendships: the ones we imagined we would have, the ones that hurt us, and the ones that helped us feel safe enough to be ourselves.

We reflect on how our families shaped the way we learned to trust people, especially growing up with strict parents who taught us to be careful about who we let close. From childhood loneliness and surface-level friendships to toxic friend breakups, long-distance connection, and chosen family, we talk about how friendship has shaped the way we love, communicate, protect ourselves, and show up for the people who matter.

We also get into what it means to have friends who know your patterns: the silence, the spirals, the overthinking, the independence, the “I don’t want to be a burden” moments, and still choose to stay.

Grab your drink and come sit with us.

What kind of friend makes you feel safest? We’d love to hear your thoughts!

Why did they make falling in love look so easy in those early 2000s rom-coms? Because we've been having the opposite experience. You know, some of us grew up believing we'd have love figured out by now, then life happens.

This week, we talk about the expectations we had for dating versus the reality we've experienced thus far. From changing standards and learning to set boundaries to navigating independence, careers, and vulnerability, we explore what it means to look for a relationship where you're not just wanted, but truly understood.

We also reflect on the lessons we've learned, the mistakes we're grateful for, and the advice we'd give our younger selves about love.

What advice would you give your 20-year-old self about dating? We'd love to hear your perspective.

Every conversation has a beginning, and this is ours.

In our very first episode, we introduce ourselves, share how our friendship began, and talk about the experiences that inspired us to create The Soft Parts Podcast.

Hosted by Haitian-American and Vietnamese-American friends Nik and Nhi, our conversations are shaped by both our lived experiences and our professional backgrounds. As a licensed psychotherapist and a licensed physician assistant, we bring different perspectives to each conversation, one grounded in emotional exploration and the other in analytical thinking, while remaining equally curious about what it means to be human.

Whether you’re here to reflect, feel understood, or simply listen in, we’re grateful you’ve found us. We hope this is the first of many meaningful conversations we’ll share together.

Please note: While we draw from our professional backgrounds, this podcast is intended for educational and conversational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical or mental health care.