This week on Finding a Football Club, let’s celebrate the art of burning money. The lads are sifting through the wreckage of the modern transfer market to build the ultimate Transfer Flop XI.

But first, the gang must address the aggressively hand-gesturing elephant in the room: Italy. As Roberto mourns his nation's failure to qualify for a historic third consecutive World Cup, Will twists the knife by helpfully pointing out that the Azzurri are now statistically better at cricket than football.

Eventually, the squad looks at the worst transfer business of the 21st century. Which includes Barcelona’s dodgy accountancy, the enduring mystery of Ali Dia, Gonzalo Higuain’s male pattern baldness, and League Cup disaster artist, Kepa Arrizabalaga.

Elsewhere, the gang wonders who had an affair with Khalid Boulahrouz’s wife, why Oleksandr Zinchenko isn't fighting on the front lines, and if David Luiz is the most expensive virgin.