The Truth I Could Not See

Welcome to The Truth I Could Not See Bookcast—where I read my book, The Truth I Could Not See, chapter by chapter, sharing the raw and deeply personal journey that changed everything for me.

For years, I was consumed by a relentless battle—an eating disorder, crippling mental health struggles, and the devastating loss of my mom. But in the midst of my brokenness, one question refused to be ignored:

"What if everything I’ve ever believed is wrong?"

Raised in the LDS church, I thought I understood faith. I thought I knew the difference between Christianity and what I had been taught. But life had a way of unraveling those assumptions. Through relationships, loss, and a moment that shook me to my core—when a Christian friend said, "Your Jesus is not the same as mine"—I was forced to wrestle with what I truly believed.

Then, in my darkest moment, I had an encounter with the living God—one that shattered my despair and redefined my faith in ways I never saw coming.

This bookcast is for those who feel lost, desperate, or questioning everything they’ve known. If you’ve ever struggled with faith, mental health, or simply wondered if there’s something more, join me. You don’t have to walk this road alone.

Let’s take this journey together—one chapter at a time.

If you would like to purchase a physical copy of the book, find the link in the show notes or head to Amazon and search The Truth I Could Not See.

link for book - https://a.co/d/h114NhS

Chapter 23 - The Simple Gospel

The gospel is a free gift—available to anyone who comes to Jesus. Yet, we often complicate it, believing we must earn salvation through our efforts. The Apostle Paul warned the Galatians against this distorted thinking, reminding them that righteousness comes by faith, not by works.

Jesus' sacrifice established a new covenant, replacing the old laws with one based on love and grace. Just as ancient blood covenants sealed unbreakable bonds, Christ’s blood secured eternal redemption for all who believe. His death wasn’t just a covering of sin—it completely wiped it away.

Many of us, like the author, struggle with self-condemnation, thinking we must work harder to be worthy of God’s love. But the truth is, we can never earn salvation—it is given freely through faith in Christ. The gospel is simple: Jesus finished the work. He is the only way to true freedom, redemption, and life.

Embrace the simplicity of the gospel. Let go of striving, and trust in the finished work of Jesus.

To own a physical copy of this book purchase here: https://a.co/d/7rHLA2s

Thank you for taking the time to listen!

Chapter 22: The Heart of the Matter

In this episode, we dive into The Heart of the Matter, a chapter that explores the deep, transformative journey of faith. Using the metaphor of an artichoke, I reflect on peeling back the layers of my own misconceptions and struggles, only to realize that true healing and transformation come not from uncovering my own heart, but from connecting with God’s heart.

I share my personal wrestlings with old thought patterns, moments of doubt, and the ongoing battle between flesh and spirit. Even after a miraculous encounter with Jesus, the journey of healing and sanctification is a process, one that requires daily surrender and trust. Through scripture, personal experiences, and moments of revelation, we’ll explore what it truly means to experience real life through the real Jesus—the only source of lasting freedom and renewal.

Tune in as we unpack the heart of God, the power of truth, and the invitation to step into a life truly worth living.

Get book here https://a.co/d/ejvj3yb

Chapter 21: The Cost

In this episode, I share one of the most difficult moments of my journey—choosing between my lifelong religion and the undeniable truth of Jesus Christ. After my radical encounter with God, I knew I could never return to the life I once knew, but telling my family was another challenge entirely.

With a heavy heart, I wrestled with the cost of following Jesus. Would I be disowned? Misunderstood? Could I bear the disappointment in my father’s voice? Yet, the call was clear: Jesus alone must be my foundation. As I broke the news to my family, I was met with a mixture of love, confusion, and sorrow. Some asked why I couldn’t stay in my faith and still follow Jesus—but I knew He does not share His throne.

This chapter is about sacrifice, obedience, and the deep, sometimes painful cost of following Christ. But as I discovered, nothing in this world—no tradition, no approval, no comfort—compares to the freedom and life He gives. Join me as I read through this chapter and reflect on what it means to give everything for the One who gave it all for us.

Purchase book here https://a.co/d/gmqFqV8

Chapter 20: Every Thought Captive

In this episode, I explore the power of disciplining the mind and the journey to true mental and spiritual freedom. After overcoming the spirit of suicide, I realized that healing wasn’t just about deliverance—it required a daily renewal of my thoughts. The battle was in my mind, and I had to take every thought captive, as Scripture commands.

I share how I learned to distinguish truth from lies, challenging years of negative self-talk and deeply ingrained false beliefs. Through prayer, study, and seeking God’s truth, I began to break free from the chains of self-doubt, fear, and false doctrine. My mind, once tormented and chaotic, became a place of peace and clarity as I immersed myself in God’s Word.

True freedom is worth fighting for, and in this chapter, I reflect on what it means to step forward, unshackled, and fully embrace the new life Christ offers. This episode is for anyone who struggles with their thoughts, identity, or past beliefs—tune in to hear how God’s truth truly sets us free.

Get book here https://a.co/d/isJjHEg

Chapter 19: Lingering Spirits

In this episode, I dive into the reality of spiritual battles even after salvation. While my encounter with Jesus brought freedom and transformation, I soon realized that lingering spirits from my past still tried to hold me captive. I share my struggles with intrusive thoughts, moments of despair, and the unsettling question: If I’m saved, why am I still being tormented?

Through unexpected encounters and the guidance of faithful believers, I learned about spiritual warfare and the authority I now carried in Christ. I discovered the power of calling out and rebuking the spirits that sought to steal my peace, and how true freedom comes from knowing and standing in the truth of Jesus.

This chapter is about breaking free from the lies of the enemy and embracing the power of God’s love. If you’ve ever felt trapped in cycles of fear, doubt, or oppression, this episode is for you. Tune in as I share how I learned to fight back and walk in lasting victory.

Get book here https://a.co/d/3TqOe4u

Chapter 18: Be of Good Cheer

In this episode, I share how my growing relationship with Jesus not only transformed my faith but also brought unexpected healing. For the first time in years, I was free from the struggles that had once consumed me—self-harm, grief, and spiritual confusion. But with this newfound clarity came deep questions: What about my family? Had they truly known Jesus?

A powerful encounter with Scripture reassured me that my mother had found Him before she passed away. This moment of divine comfort reshaped my understanding of family and eternity. I realized that the greatest gift isn’t being together forever—it’s being with Jesus forever. True belonging isn’t found in earthly relationships alone, but in knowing and being known by God.

Join me as I reflect on this revelation and what it means to be part of God’s eternal family.

Buy book here https://a.co/d/jbWjRUG

Chapter 17 - The Gift of Jesus

As the holiday season ended, the narrator found herself consumed by her newfound faith in Jesus but unsure how to move forward. Returning to the Mormon Church for the last time on her birthday, January 4, 2009, she experienced an undeniable realization—this was not the Jesus she had encountered. A deep unease settled in as she listened to testimonies and worshiped in a way that felt empty. By the end of the service, she made a life-changing decision never to return.

In the following days, the truth of Scripture dismantled her previous beliefs, revealing the sufficiency of Christ’s sacrifice. She had never before questioned the idea that salvation required additional ordinances, but now she saw the fullness of Jesus’ work on the cross. For the first time, she understood that Jesus alone is the way to God—no additional advocates, no restored gospel needed.

This revelation reshaped her entire understanding of faith. She realized she had been minimizing the significance of Christ’s ministry and grace. The more she read the Bible, the more she embraced the truth: she was saved by grace alone, not by works, not by church ordinances. Overwhelmed with gratitude, she marveled at the depth of God’s love—a love that had found her in her brokenness and brought her into true freedom.

Get book here https://a.co/d/2461KXc

Chapter 16 - A New Start

After her transformative encounter with Jesus, the narrator experiences a newfound joy and freedom from past struggles. She eagerly dives into the Bible and begins exploring Christian community, despite initial hesitation. When a snowstorm hits Portland, an unexpected invitation to a Christmas party leads her to new friendships and a deeper sense of belonging. Stranded for days due to the weather, she spends time with a group of young Christians, engaging in worship, sharing her testimony, and witnessing authentic faith in action. A connection with Jim, one of David’s roommates, sparks meaningful conversations about faith, reinforcing her belief that these encounters are no coincidence. As she parts ways with her new friends, she realizes God is guiding her toward a new chapter—one filled with grace, community, and an unfolding purpose.

Get Book here https://a.co/d/f7PNiro

In Chapter 15, Authority, I share a pivotal moment in my faith journey—realizing that my authority came from Jesus alone, not from any church or man. After my encounter with Jesus, I sought guidance at a Christian church, only to be dismissed by the pastor. In that moment of disappointment, God spoke clearly: I am your authority now; you only go through Me, not through man. This revelation shattered the belief system I had grown up with, where priesthood authority was necessary to access God. I was finally free—no longer dependent on an institution to determine my worthiness. Jesus alone held the power, and through Him, I had direct access to the Father.

To purchase book follow this link https://a.co/d/h6o4bsZ