Today on Modern Relationships Erik Torenberg is joined by Jared Fliesler, a former executive at Google, Square, and Scribd turned founder coach, discusses how to identify core values in partners, distinguish between compromise and "horse trading," and determine when someone is "good enough." He shares insights on building meaningful connections, his co-living experiments, and navigating long-distance relationships.

Modern Relationships is a podcast from Turpentine. Learn more: www.turpentine.co

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SPONSOR: Relationship Hero

It’s an open secret in Silicon Valley that people are using relationship coaches. Sign up for 1-on-1 relationship coaching (from anywhere) at RelationshipHero.com/modern. Get $50 off your first session.

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LINKS | BOOKS RECOMMENDED:

The 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership by Jim Dethmer, Diana Champan, etc: https://conscious.is/15-commitments

Book: https://www.amazon.com/15-Commitments-Conscious-Leadership-Sustainable-ebook/dp/B00R3MHWUE

Positive Intelligence by Shirzad Chamine: https://www.amazon.com/Positive-Intelligence-Individuals-Achieve-Potential/dp/1608322785

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FOLLOW ON X:

Jared -@JaredSF

Erik - @eriktorenberg

Turpentine - @turpentinemedia

Chapters

• 00:00:00 Intro
• 00:01:30 How to Know When Someone is "Good Enough"
• 00:04:20 Core Values vs. Surface Compatibility
• 00:07:02 Evolution of Relationship Priorities
• 00:14:06 Embracing Past Relationship Struggles
• 00:15:48 Sponsor: Relationship Hero
• 00:18:31 Tools for Aligning on What Really Matters
• 00:24:35 Values Evolution: From San Francisco to Austin
• 00:30:45 Living in Community: Beyond Roommates
• 00:39:01 House Values and Shared Agreements
• 00:41:17 When to Call It Quits in a Relationship
• 00:45:22 Compromise vs. Horse Trading
• 00:50:27 Communication Frameworks for Deeper Connection
• 00:57:30 Navigating Age Gaps and Family Planning
• 01:01:51 Making Long-Distance Relationships Work
• 01:11:00 The Paradox of Choice in Modern Dating
• 01:20:45 Dating Apps and Modern Gay Relationships
• 01:25:34 Polyamory: Complexity and Connection
• 01:27:38 Wrap