This post has been updated! You can read the latest version here on tashdoherty.com.

Introduction 📖

So, you’re curious about having a one-night stand. I’m glad you’re here! I’ve had a few in my time; some very successful, some less so. Whether this will be your first one or you’re a regular wondering how to make casual sex work better for you, I’ve compiled everything I know to write this ultimate guide to having the best one-night stands ever.

The main difference in preparation depends on the sexes of the partners involved and whether it’s going to take place at your house or theirs. Because I’m a cis-gendered female who mostly has sex with men, this article is geared towards heterosexual couples. But I hope that no matter the genitals of you or your partner, you’ll find something helpful here. Let’s dig in!

Get ready. Stay ready 😜

Before: How To Prepare for a One-Night Stand 🌃

* Find someone you’re attracted to: If you’re not attracted to this person, don’t even bother going through with the rest of everything else. This night is about you having fun, not pleasing other people.

* Set clear expectations with yourself: Decide what you want to get out of this night and if you have any clear boundaries. Do you want to have penetrative sex (penis in an orifice, either vagina or butt) with them? Where is this one-night stand going to take place? Do you want to stay over, or are you going to take your ass home in an Uber at 4 am?

* Prioritize your needs first: I’m adding this here because I’m terrible at doing this. As soon as I find a guy who I want to have sex with, I lose all sense of my needs and life priorities. So, be realistic for a moment: Do you have anything you need to get done the day after your one-night stand? The point is to make sure you’re caring for your general well-being and not just dropping everything for a random dude you will never see again.

* Plan your sleep: There’s evidence that women need more sleep than men. How well do you sleep in someone else’s bed or having someone in your bed? Can you survive on three hours, or would you be better off with eight? Even if you don’t know exactly because this is your first one-night stand, just take a guess, and then you’ll learn whether you were right or wrong after the experience.

* Set clear expectations with your partner: Communicate with them if you can. Plan where you are going to do this. If it’s at your house, is your partner allowed to sleep over? Do you need them out of the house by 10 am so you can go to your yoga class?

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