What happens to us when things go wrong?

Pressure has a way of revealing parts of ourselves that ordinary circumstances can keep hidden. It can show us how we respond to mistakes, how much our identity is tied to being competent, and whether we can adapt when the situation is no longer within our control.

In this episode of The Unsaid, I’m joined by Silvia Rizzo, who works across high-performance sport and business, with a focus on leadership, decision-making, error management, and mental resilience in high-pressure environments.

We talk about what happens after a mistake, why some people become defensive while others learn and adapt, and how the fear of losing credibility can influence the decisions we make.

We also explore the tension between control and adaptability, what elite sport can teach us about recovering from failure, and the hidden fears that can exist underneath high performance.

Because sometimes the hardest part isn’t making the decision.

It’s what happens after we discover we got it wrong.

To learn more about Silvia’s work on mindset, leadership, and strategic behaviour, visit:

https://www.hofmarabuntablog.com/mindset-leadership-strategic-behavior

You’ve been listening to The Unsaid, where we go beyond the obvious and explore what lies beneath the surface.

What happens when the way we respond to life has more history behind it than we realize?

In this episode of The Unsaid, I’m joined by Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst, a psychologist, author, and relationship expert with 50 years of experience working with children, men, fathers, couples, and families.

We talk about the experiences that quietly shape us: the emotions we learned to express, the ones we learned to hide, the relationship patterns we repeat, and the ways our childhood experiences can continue showing up in our adult lives.

Dr. Gloria also shares what her years of working with boys, men, fathers, and families have taught her about emotional development, generational patterns, and the connection between understanding ourselves and actually changing.

We explore why knowing where a pattern came from doesn’t always make it easy to change, what meaningful self-reflection really looks like, and how we can begin questioning the parts of ourselves we’ve simply accepted.

At the center of the conversation are two questions:

Where did I learn to be this way?

And:

Do I still want to live this way?

A conversation about the stories we carry, the patterns we inherit, and what happens when we finally become curious about them.

Welcome to The Unsaid.

How much of who we are is actually us, and how much have we learned along the way?

In this episode of The Unsaid, I sit down with Arnold Beekes, founder of Brain Athletes, to explore what happens when we stop treating our thoughts, emotional patterns, and reactions as fixed parts of our personality.

We talk about the beliefs we inherit, the behaviours we repeat, and the things we often dismiss with a simple, “That’s just who I am.”

Arnold introduces the idea of un-conditioning, and we explore how the stories we absorb about worth, success, safety, and power can shape the way we move through life without us even realizing it.

We also talk about ambition, pressure, and what happens to us when life stops going according to plan. Can we actually train ourselves to respond differently? What does “less panic, more presence” look like outside of a training room and in the middle of everyday life?

The conversation also moves into leadership and Arnold’s idea of becoming “Better for All” leaders, where personal development isn’t only about becoming more successful or productive, but about how our growth affects the people and systems around us.

And we end with four ideas at the heart of his work: Truth, Goodness, Beauty, and Love.

Maybe the question isn’t simply, “Who am I?”

Maybe it’s:

What am I training myself to become?

Learn more about Arnold Beekes and Brain Athletes:
brainathletes.club⁠

The Unsaid with Fae explores the stories, experiences, questions, and perspectives that exist beneath what we see.

Listen. Question. Look a little deeper.

What if some of the things we call ambition are actually attempts to prove that we are enough?

In this episode of The Unsaid, I sit down with Steve Barton, an entrepreneur, consultant, financial advisor, author, and creator of The Game of Ten, who has spent more than four decades in business.

We talk about the part of achievement that rarely makes it into the story: the need for approval, self-doubt, fear, the moving finish line, and the feeling that the next accomplishment might finally make us feel like we’re enough.

Steve shares what he has learned about the difference between pursuing something because you genuinely want it and pursuing it because you need it to prove something about yourself.

We also explore his ideas around “I Am Enough. I Do Enough. I Have Enough.”, replacing judgment with curiosity, and what decades of experience have taught him about ambition, success, and self-worth.

At 70, Steve reflects on what he understands now that he wishes he had been curious about at 20.

Maybe the question isn’t whether we should want more.

Maybe it’s worth asking why we want it in the first place.

Connect with Steve and learn more about his work:https://www.stevebartoncoaching.com/

The Unsaid with Fae explores the stories, experiences, questions, and perspectives that exist beneath what we see.

Listen. Question. Look a little deeper.

What if the version of someone’s story we know best is only the beginning?

The polished career. The confident decisions. The life that appears to make perfect sense.

But every story begins somewhere else with a first step, a difficult choice, an unexpected turning point, or a moment that changed everything.

Behind every visible success are the doubts, sacrifices, struggles, and experiences that often go unspoken.

In this first episode, I introduce The Unsaid a podcast about the beginnings behind people’s journeys, the moments that shaped them, and the questions that reveal what lies beneath the surface.

Because there is always more to the story.

Welcome to The Unsaid.