In today’s Update Journal, a contestant on The Weakest Link proves that sometimes confidence and knowledge are two very different things after naming Big Bird as the U.S. Secretary of State. Somewhere on Sesame Street, Big Bird is now preparing a foreign policy briefing with Cookie Monster handling snacks and Oscar the Grouch in charge of negotiations.

Meanwhile, I've discovered a new snack that has him questioning my willpower, my diet, and possibly my life choices. What started as “just trying something new” has quickly turned into the kind of snack obsession where the bag mysteriously empties itself while you’re not looking.

And in Brandon’s Take, we brace for the spring side of Daylight Saving Time—the one where we all lose an hour of sleep and spend the next week wondering why we feel like we got hit by a bus. The clocks jump forward, our patience jumps backward, and coffee suddenly becomes a required life support system.

So today: questionable game show answers, questionable snack discipline, and the annual tradition of arguing with the clock. Just another completely normal day around here.

In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Wednesday, a federal judge has blocked President Trump’s administration’s efforts to halt New York’s first-in-the-nation congestion fee meant to reduce traffic and pump revenue into the region’s aging transit system.

The NYPD were searching for two suspects believed to have been involved in an attack near Manhattan’s Penn Station when a 37-year-old man was set on fire as he slept.

And in Washington, Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem defended her department’s immigration enforcement tactics in front of a Senate committee and pushed back against criticism from Democrats who say she wrongly disparaged two protesters killed by federal officers in Minneapolis earlier this year.