New York football has officially left the chat… again. The Jets have clinched their annual tradition of heartbreak, the Giants became the first team eliminated from the postseason (because of course they did), and all of us are already Googling “When does baseball season start?” like we didn’t swear off the Mets at least twice last year. Misery truly does love company—good thing both teams are providing plenty of it. And for today’s Honorable Mention: Party of none. A bar owner has banned solo drinkers from entering his business in order to “mitigate risk” the companionless have been known to bring, dividing the internet over the controversial policy. Because nothing says “welcome to the holidays” quite like being told even your beer needs a +1.

In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Tuesday, New York City celebrated Gotham FC’s capture of its second National Women’s Soccer League championship in three years, with a procession for the players in Manhattan and the presentation of the keys to the city.

The Big Apple firefighter’s union is steaming mad over the sudden discovery of 68 boxes of Ground Zero health data following the Sept. 11, 2001 terror attacks — files they were told never existed.

And in Washington, a federal judge dismissed the criminal cases against former FBI Director James Comey and New York Attorney General Letitia James, concluding that the prosecutor who brought the charges at President Trump’s urging was illegally appointed by the Justice Department.