The Wandering Jew Studio

This episode is for the sensitive people out there! In this reflective episode, I chat about a variety of topics, from some announcements in my personal life to the story of Chana’s prayer, feeling like “too much”, breakups and more. The concept of being “too much” has come up for me in a variety of aspects of life, and I wanted to talk about the struggles behind feeling this way, the beauty of feeling, and why it is good to stay soft and open. Then, I share two moments when I felt the connectedness of everyone dealing with something. Then I chat about how Chana from the Torah was seen as “too much” in her story and what we can learn from that story. Then we talk about breakups, and I share some tips from a recent one I experienced, and end with a blessing, as always. This episode was cathartic and calming and I hope you enjoy listening!

(0:00-9:16) - Announcements

(9:16-13:52) - What does it mean to be “too much”?

(13:52-17:14) Examples from life

(17:14-20:09) Summer reflections and the time of transition (random tangent?)

(20:09-26:50) The story of Chana, and some halakhot of prayer

(26:50 -end) Breakups!

In this episode, I chat with my older brother Boris, all about sustainability, Jewish journeys, parenting, and more! I’m always looking to improve environmentally, and Boris shared some of his best tips with me, on how to be kinder to our planet. Boris shares his career journey from software engineering to sustainable landscape design and we learn all about the wonders of growing your own food. Also, when Boris was my age, he quit his job and moved to India for four months, and we hear more about why he chose that adventure! Then, on parenting, we talk about how Judaism plays a role and the beauty of the rituals and ethics that it provides. Boris knows what he’s talking about and his calming and educational voice is sure to bring you some peaceful vibes as well as teach you something new along the way! Happy listening!

In this episode, I chat with sex educator and coach Elena Potek. Elena works one-on-one with clients to help them harness their sexual energy, reframe old narratives around sexuality, and get in touch with their most authentic selves. I am fascinated by this concept of sexual energy and what it means and how we can tap into it and Elena helps answer all my questions. Then we talk about ideas surrounding sexuality that Elena learned growing up in an Orthodox environment and Elena shares her journey on how she moved away from that mindset. Along the way, we discuss the virginity construct, Elena shares some funny stories from her travels, and we finish off with a conversation about self-confidence and battling self-doubt. I especially loved Elena’s point about how people mirror each other’s energy and how the energy you put out into the world is the energy you will get back. Happy listening!

Follow Elena on Instagram at @Elena_potek and check out her website to find out more!

Sexual energy playlist curated by Elena: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4sDM6klCjjDCQkD9OtzTR0?si=b562b52ba2834a07

(0:00-5:58) Intro

(5:58-12:00) sexual energy FAQ

(12:00-18:06) Growing up orthodox and how that impacted Elena

(18:06-25:50) the stigma of losing virginity

(25:50-29:57) lessons learned from backpacking in South America

(29:57-34:48) What do people struggle with most?

(34:48- 39:30) Issues in sex ed and dealing with shame

(39:30-end) some positive dating related advice

In this episode, I chat with friend of the pod, Alan Avitan, low-key dating coach, upper-west sider, and great advice giver. We chat about how to make the first move in big group scenes, both from the girl's and guys' perspectives. Then we talk about how the dating system favors men and why that is. Alan really speaks to the difficulties women face and the reality of the unequal nature of the dating game. It’s definitely not smooth sailing out there, but we’re all in it together. Alan’s positive attitude will surely inspire you. Happy listening!

(00:00-6:21) Intro and catch up

(6:21-13:35) making the first move

(13:35-16:33) post-pandemic carpe diem spirit

(16:33-23:51) different tactics and taking risks

(23:51-34:21) how the shidduch system is geared towards men

(34:21-37:48) Are there more girls than guys out there?

(37:48-end) Don’t be shy! It’s 2021 baby

In this episode, I chat all about the ups and downs of self-sabotaging, both in the Torah and in my own experiences. Before we dive in, I share some changes I’ve felt in myself since we have started returning to “normalcy”. Then, I discuss the ways self-sabotage manifests and how it relates to me. I share a tragic yet entertaining story with an ex from college and reflect on my patterns in dating. Then, we bring in the good ol’ Torah characters to share their self-sabotaging stories. This is an intense topic, and yet still, I manage to laugh and have a good time while discussing, so I hope listening to this episode is cathartic and fun for you!

(0:00-7:25) The carpe diem vibe of June

(7:25-11:12) social anxiety and dating break

(11:12-15:20) the psychology of self-sabotage

(15:20-25:40) ex story

(25:40-29:09) why we do it

(29:09-38:36) Shimshon the womanizer and others

(38:36-end) reframing the narrative

This episode is about the recent influx of socialization in life and reflecting on the mental health effects of the pandemic. I unpack the overwhelming feelings that come with adjusting to a busier life post-vaccine. I start off by sharing a funny story from my adventures on the Clubhouse social media app and then move to a larger conversation about mental health. I reflect on a recent party I threw, CDC’s new guidelines, and how I want to hold on to all my recent awesome memories. Then I dive into the larger picture of mental health effects of the pandemic worldwide, both negative and positive, to give space to all the trauma and pain our world has and continues to suffer through. I reflect personally on the past year and a half and the different waves of emotion I’ve gone through. Lastly, I end off by sharing some encouraging words to remind us to slow down and be patient and kind with ourselves as we process all of these feelings.

(0:00-6:10)-Intro and updates

(6:10-12:17) my embarrassing Clubhouse story

(12:17-18:05) Recent fun parties memories

(18:05-19:46) reflecting on worldwide mental health during the pandemic

(29:46-31:28) why socializing has been harder post-pandemic

(31:28-end) The final takeaway

In this episode, we return to chat with Dr. Bat Sheva Marcus, certified sex therapist and the Clinical Director of Maze Women’s Sexual Health, host of the podcast “Joy of Text”, and awesome woman. We talk about her new book Sex Points, the importance of fantasy, and how to tackle the guilt and shame that surrounds sex. Happy listening!

Buy the book anywhere books are sold from Barnes and Noble to Amazon by searching Sex Points by Dr. Batsheva Marcus.

In honor of mental health awareness month, I chat with Shira Lankin Sheps, editor-in-chief of the Layers Project Magazine. The Layers Project is an online magazine for Jewish women focusing on the challenges and triumphs of their lives. The magazine focuses on breaking the stigma to create a community that is centered around healing and connection.

We talked about the process of catharsis that undergoes when people share these stories online. Then, our conversation took a spiritual turn to discuss the role of God and faith in dealing with mental health issues. We ended off with Shira sharing some interesting thoughts about Kabbalah, the expansion of women’s power through history, redemption, and the many challenges that come with advocating for feminism in the Orthodox world.

Check out The Layers Project Magazine at thelayersprojectmagazine.com

FB and Instagram: @thelayersproject

Order Shira’s new book “Layers” at Koren publishers online at korenpub.com

(0:00-13:42) Intro and the recent war in Israel

(13:39-17:30) What is the Layers Project?

(17:30-25:00) Meaning-making and narrative therapy

(25:00-34:00) Life lessons from running the magazine and the role of faith in dealing with mental health issues

(34:00-end) The changing roles of women and feminism

In this episode, I chat with a dear bestie of mine, Shira Feen, a fellow Jewess and design professional currently residing on the Upper West Side. We talk about the origin story of Shira’s famous catchphrase, “own the city” Then, we hear more about Shira’s recent solo trip she took to the Grand Canyon and Sedona, Arizona. She shares some valuable travel info, from Airbnb experiences to hiking alone, selfie sticks, and more!

To reach Shira, you can dm her on Instagram @shirafeen

(0:00-2:59) Intro

(2:59-9:00) Miguel concert, hype girls, and how to own the city

(9:00-25:14) Travel tips!

(25:14-end) Our favorite memories together

In this episode, I chat with Rabbi Scott Kahn, co-host of the Intimate Judaism and Orthodox conundrum podcast. Intimate Judaism deals with intimacy and healthy sexuality in the context of Jewish family while remaining firmly in the bounds of halacha and the Orthodox conundrum podcast focuses on major issues that affect the Orthodox word.

Together, we dive into a serious conversation to address some tough questions about how to deal with the tensions of Jewish law and today’s realities: Does God judge us? Are there certain cases when it is ok to violate Jewish law? What is the role of halachic authorities in dealing with the emotions of others? How can we understand the difference between acceptance versus approval? Rabbi Kahn shares his thoughtful approach through examples from the Torah, allegories, and personal reflections. This thought-provoking episode is sure to get your mind buzzing. Happy listening!

(0:00-11:34) Toxic masculinity, but mostly how people don’t talk about sex enough in the Orthodox community

(11:34-25:00) Shomer negiah, but mostly does God Judge us? 

(25:00-30:44) Finding space in the Jewish world for LGBTQ folks

(30:44-41:23) Porn, but mostly what is the role of halachic authorities?

(41:23-end) Is saying “we don’t know what God wants” always a good enough answer?