The Wrong Hands: Your Beginners' DnD Podcast

What about 'Volo's Guide to Entertainment'? That may hurt my credentials as a serious explorer. Anyway, I think I should arrive at The Roost soon. I've heard interesting things. I'll give the place a chance to enthral me but I'm not going to force it. I've heard stories about the Eastern forest, too.

- Volo's journal

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The Diary of R.S.

They dream so small. They're using my discarded inventions as fuel. They could subjugate their local dimension with half the stuff I've chucked away. I suppose there's a reason I'm the inventor shark and they're the hack pilot fish.

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My faith in them may be misplaced.

- Excerpt from an ancient manuscript. Language: unknown

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I'm considering a moustache. A large moustache. Although, it's quite warm around here. But, on the other hand, I am leaving soon. Anyway, back to business. I have enough content now to consider my next book title. Perhaps, 'Volo's Guide to Very Specific Things'? Or, 'Volo's Guide to Divination and Psychic Eavesdropping'? It's a bit long but more relevant, I suppose.

- Volo's journal

The Diary of R.S.

Why does this space spirit thing want my interdimensional travel formula so much? It seems to do a fair amount of dimension jumping on its own. Perhaps it consumes a lot of its energy doing so, it seemed quite tired the last time it tried to capture me. Note to self: avoid intergalactic rest stop bathrooms.

My time in Chult has been less profitable than expected but entertaining, certainly. The clairvoyant I mentioned in the previous chapter seems to have overheard someone or something speaking with their mind. The clairvoyant is a little mad, though so I'm not sure how reliable they are. They did seem to recall what the other voice said with startling accuracy, however, that has to be worth something. 

- Volo's journal

I've been in this family-friendly eatery for...I don't know how long. Something about dying repeatedly has altered my perception of time. I no longer count days or nights, for there are neither here. I simply count the space between death and reluctant resurrection. The food is also terrible. 

- Excerpt from writings on an ancient rag, thought to be for face cleaning. Discovered at site number 1832. Language: unknown.

"I believe my performance was convincing. It's been a while since I've needed to use illusion spells but they seemed to work, despite my lack of practise. I'm still not sure whether the errant creature we seek is behind all this, but there is undoubtedly something disrupting life-altering arcana in this area." 

- Local clairvoyant's recollection of a psychic message they 'overheard' during meditation. Authenticity yet to be verified. Volo's journal.

They surprised me. Greatly surprised, even. Hopefully, they won't realise what it is. Why would they? As far as I've heard, it's useless if not used for its purpose. As my hopes increase, so do the risks. Much has changed.

- Excerpt from an ancient manuscript. Language: unknown

The Diary of R.S.

Okay, writing and reading my own thoughts is actually more stimulating than I expected. I've added some upgrades to this 'book', however. I don't know how regular people get by with just paper and pencil to record their ideas. I suppose they don't really have ideas on this scale, maybe cavemen tools are fine for capturing their 'innovations'. Either way, my miniature self is turning out to be quite clever in a diabolical sort of way; much like this entry, it beats the other performances I've seen in its category.