TheRusticMystic

The Twelfth Step reminds us “to practice these principles in all our affairs.”  In NA, we see living examples of this suggestion all around us.  The more experienced members, who seem to have an aura of peace surrounding them, demonstrate the rewards of applying this bit of wisdom in their lives.

To receive the rewards of the Twelfth Step, it is vital that we practice the spiritual principles of recovery even when no one is looking.  If we talk about recovery at meetings but continue to live as we did in active addiction, our fellow members may suspect that we are doing nothing more than quoting bumper stickers.

What we pass on to newer members comes more from how we live than what we say.  If we advise someone to “turn it over” without having experienced the miracle of the Third Step, chances are the message will fail to reach the ears of the newcomer for whom it’s intended.  On the other hand, if we “walk what we talk” and share our genuine experience in recovery, the message will surely be evident to all.

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Just for today:  I will practice the principles of recovery, even when I’m the only one who knows.

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Life is a series of changes, both large and small.  Although we may know and accept this fact intellectually, chances are that our initial emotional reaction to change is fear.  For some reason, we assume that each and every change is going to hurt, causing us to be miserable.

If we look back on the changes that have happened in our lives, we’ll find that most of them have been for the best.  We were probably very frightened at the prospect of life without drugs, yet it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to us.  Perhaps we’ve lost a job that we thought we’d die without, but later on we found greater challenge and personal fulfillment in a new career.  As we venture forth in our recovery, we’re likely to experience more changes.  We will outgrow old situations and become ready for new ones.

With all sorts of changes taking place, it’s only natural to grab hold of something, anything familiar and try to hold on.  Solace can be found in a Power greater than ourselves.  The more we allow changes to happen at the direction of our Higher Power, the more we’ll trust that those changes are for the best.  Faith will replace fear, and we’ll know in our hearts that all will be well.

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Just for today:  When I am afraid of a change in my life, I will take comfort from knowing that God’s will for me is good.

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It’s funny to remember how reluctant we once were to surrender to recovery.  We seemed to think we had wonderful, fulfilling lives as using addicts and that giving up our drugs would be worse than serving a life sentence at hard labor.  In reality, the opposite was true:  Our lives were miserable, but we were afraid to trade that familiar misery for the uncertainties of recovery.

It’s possible to be miserable in recovery, too, though it’s not necessary.  No one will force us to work the steps, go to meetings, or work with a sponsor.  There is no NA militia that will force us to do the things that will free us from pain.  But we do have a choice.  We’ve already chosen to give up the misery of active addiction for the sanity of recovery.  Now, if we’re ready to exchange today’s misery for even greater peace, we have a means to do just that—if we really want to.

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Just for today:  I don’t have to be miserable unless I really want to be.  Today, I will trade in my misery for the benefits of recovery.

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We often hear it said in meetings that we should “stick with the winners.”  Who are the winners in Narcotics Anonymous?  Winners are easily identified.  They work an active program of recovery, living in the solution and staying out of the problem.  Winners are always ready to reach their hands out to the newcomer.  They have sponsors and work with those sponsors.  Winners stay clean, just for today.

Winners are recovering addicts who keep a positive frame of mind.  They may be going through troubled times, but they still attend meetings and share openly about it.  Winners know in their hearts that, with the help of a Higher Power, nothing will come along that is too much to handle.

Winners strive for unity in their service efforts.  Winners practice putting “principles before personalities.”  Winners remember the principle of anonymity, doing the principled action no matter who is involved.

Winners keep a sense of humor.  Winners have the ability to laugh at themselves.  And when winners laugh, they laugh with you, not at you.

Who are the winners in Narcotics Anonymous?  Any one of us can be considered a winner.  All of us exhibit some of the traits of the winner; sometimes we come very close to the ideal, sometimes we don’t.  If we are clean today and working our program to the best of our ability, we are winners!

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Just for today:  I will strive to fulfill my ideals.  I will be a winner.

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Have you ever watched two small children carry on a conversation?  One will be talking about purple dragons while the other carries on about the discomfort caused by having sand in one’s shoes.  We sometimes encounter the same communication problems as we learn to listen to others.  We may struggle through meetings, trying desperately to hear the person sharing while our minds are busy planning what we will say when it’s our turn to speak.  In conversation, we may suddenly realize that our answers have nothing to do with the questions we’re being asked.  They are, instead, speeches prepared while in the grip of our self-obsession.

Learning how to listen—really listen—is a difficult task, but one that’s not beyond our reach.  We might begin by acknowledging in our replies what our conversational partner is saying.  We might ask if there is anything we can do to help when someone expresses a problem.  With a little practice, we can find greater freedom from self-obsession and closer contact with the people in our lives.

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Just for today:  I will quiet my own thoughts and listen to what someone else is saying.

Sometimes our readiness to have our character defects removed depends on what we call them.  If misnaming our defects makes them seem less “defective,” we may be unable to see the damage they cause.  And if they seem to be causing no harm, why would we ever ask our Higher Power to remove them from our lives?

Take “people pleasing,” for example.  Doesn’t really sound all that bad, does it?  It just means we’re nice to people, right?  Not quite.  To put it bluntly, it means we’re dishonest and manipulative.  We lie about our feelings, our beliefs, and our needs, trying to soothe others into compliance with our wishes.

Or perhaps we think we’re “easygoing.”  But does “easygoing” mean we ignore our housework, avoid confrontations, and stay put in a comfortable rut?  Then a better name for it would be “laziness,” or “procrastination,” or “fear.”

Many of us have trouble identifying our character defects.  If this is the case for us, we can talk with our sponsor or our NA friends.  We clearly and honestly describe our behavior to them and ask for their help in identifying our defects.  As time passes, we’ll become progressively better able to identify our own character defects, calling them by their true names.

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Just for today:  I will call my defects by their true names.  If I have trouble doing this, I will ask my sponsor for help.

In our addiction, our vision of ourselves was very limited.  Each day, we went through the same routine: getting, using, and finding ways and means to get more.  And that’s all we could reasonably expect for the duration of our lives.  Our potential was limited.

Today, our prospects are changed.  Recovery has given us a new vision of ourselves and our lives.  We are no longer trapped in the endlessly gray routine of addiction.  We are free to stretch ourselves in new ways, trying out new ideas and new activities.  In doing so, we come to see ourselves in a new way.  Our potential is limited only by the strength of the Higher Power that cares for us—and that strength has no limits.

In recovery, life and everything in it appears open to us.  Guided by our spiritual principles, driven by the power given us by the God of our understanding, our horizons are limitless.

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Just for today:  I will open my eyes to the possibilities before me.  My potential is as limitless and as powerful as the God of my understanding.  Today, I will act on that potential.

Before coming to NA, we used many excuses to justify our use of drugs:  “He yelled at me.”  “She said this.”  “My partner left.”  “I got fired.”  We used these same excuses for not seeking help for our drug problem.  We had to realize that these things kept happening because we kept using drugs.  Only when we made recovery our first priority did these situations begin to change.

We may be subject to the same tendency today, using excuses for not attending meetings and being of service.  Our current excuses may be of a different nature:  “I can’t leave my kids.”  “My vacation wore me out.”  “I have to finish this project so I can impress my boss.”  But still, if we don’t make recovery our first priority, chances are that we won’t have to worry about these excuses anymore.  Kids, vacations, and jobs probably won’t be in our lives if we relapse.

Our recovery must come first.  Job or no job, relationship or no relationship, we have to attend meetings, work the steps, call our sponsor, and be of service to God and others.  These simple actions are what make it possible for us to have vacations, families, and bosses to worry about.  Recovery is the foundation of our lives, making everything else possible.

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Just for today:  I will keep my priorities in order.  Number One on the list is my recovery.

Imagine what might happen if God gave us everything we wanted.  A fabulous new car, straight As, a triple salary raise—all ours without effort, just for the asking.

Now imagine the problems that come along with unearned riches, new luxury cars, and unmerited scholastic recognition.  What would we do with a huge salary raise that had been granted for no reason?  How would we handle our new financial responsibilities?  And how would we live up to that raise?  Could we ever make it appear that we deserve such pay when we know we don’t?

What about that fantastic new car?  Most come with expensive insurance premiums and hefty maintenance costs.  Are we prepared to care for what we’ve asked for?

Academic honors?  Could we perform like A students after we’d been given high marks we hadn’t earned?  What would we do if we were exposed as frauds?

When we talk to God, we need to remember that we live in the real world.  We earn rewards and learn to handle them as we do.  Confining our prayers to requests for knowledge of God’s will, the power to carry it out, and the ability to live with the consequences will ensure that we get no more than we can handle.

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Just for today:  I will pray only for knowledge of God’s will and the power to carry that out in the real world.