I thought being seen as beautiful would save me. But obsessing over my looks was never love — it was an addiction, a mask, a way to bypass shame. This is my story of objectification, survival, and reclamation.

in this episode, I share about a recent attack shame that came up when people from my past looked at my content — and the part of me that wonders if I should always be repenting for my past. I talk about the different “lives” I’ve lived, the toxic patterns born from trauma, and the difficult but necessary process of facing myself with honesty.

Messy, raw, real. This is me sitting with the weight of shame and asking: can I still choose joy?

for most of my life, I felt invisible. I wore masks, projected my hidden self onto lovers, friends, and even places I thought could complete me. but all along, my soul was leaving breadcrumbs — desires, longings, the beauty I admired in others — pointing me back to myself. in this episode, I share how I’m learning to become my own mirror: to see myself clearly, to reclaim what I once repressed, and to finally feel seen — by me.

follow me on TikTok: @helenaearlss

i left therapy work because i couldn’t keep pretending. the reality of healing — mine and yours — is messy, spiritual, nonlinear. i don’t want to be a trauma scholar. i want to be a truth-teller.

land of the free is a poem about survival & masking. in speaking it, the “clone” is replaced by the real me.

A brutally honest poem about my emotional landscape growing up — and how I learned to disappear. Part of unmasking is giving words to the story I once couldn’t tell.

I’m learning how to take off my invisibility cloak. That cloak is shame. For years it kept me in hiding, but I’m asking: how do I live in this world as myself? There are no easy answers, only a commitment to the little girl in me who is done hiding under the bed. This is me choosing to be seen. Come with me.

🎧 Listen on Spotify/Apple: linktr.ee/helenakearls

📱 TikTok: Helena.earlss

This is the first entry in my messy reclamation of my own voice — no plan, just a burning fire to be real before it’s too late. The things I’ve kept inside have eaten at me, and the person I’ve tried to present as isn’t really me. This Is Not Advice is my unfiltered journey.

An ex-therapist admits she knows nothing. This is my confessional—a space for the raw, messy, contradictory truth. I walked away from my career, blew up my life, and now I’m letting intuition—not fear—drive. No advice. No performance. Just me, telling the truth in real time.