This Is Sparta

When I recorded the last episode 2 years ago, I thought it was a one and done deal... But here I am 2 years later, with another edition of my podcast, This Is Sparta.

1. more to say about it, I also have so much more to say about everything else that's come with it.

In 2015, I underwent life-changing gastric sleeve surgery. To Love and Conquer is a mediation on both how I got there, and what has transpired since then. As it turns out, when you

• yourself off, you're still left with what remains.

True transformation isn’t physical—it’s a reckoning with your fears. In this powerful finale, Kosta explores the internal battle that follows his surgery. From self-destructive patterns to facing fears head-on, he reflects on the Hebrew concept of Hagah—meditation as a devouring force. “You will always find yourself, no matter how much you try not to.”

Waking up after surgery isn’t the rebirth Kosta imagined. Swaddled, disoriented, and stripped of familiar comforts, he grapples with feelings of mourning, isolation, and the dark truth that change isn’t immediate. As he marks his 29th birthday, Kosta confronts what it means to cut away parts of yourself and face what remains.

The day before surgery, sleepless and uncertain, Kosta reflects on the road that led him here. This intimate episode captures the tension between hope and fear, the weight of a body that feels unbearable, and the questions that arise before life-altering change. “What happens when I take away the only coping mechanism I’ve ever known?”

Seeking a “new beginning,” Kosta finds himself at a health retreat in the remote Southern Highlands. What should’ve been a space for healing unravels into something far stranger—an encounter with fundamentalism, isolation, and the danger of misplaced trust. With dark humour and sharp introspection, this episode explores how desperation can lead us to places we’d rather forget.

In this deeply personal episode, Kosta recounts his gastric sleeve surgery—a decision born from despair and transformed into an act of radical self-love. Through his raw reflections, he explores the complexities of weight, identity, and mental health. How long does it take to change a life? The answer isn’t in hours or incisions but in the courage to love yourself when nothing else feels possible.

What happens when a podcast becomes an unfinished thought? In this prologue, Kosta shares the origin and rebirth of This Is Sparta. This isn’t about perfect production or regular schedules—it’s about an experience that had to exist outside of him.

Part reflection, part invitation, this episode sets the stage for meditations on life’s personal battles, transformations, and the radical act of self-love.