Let’s just say it and get it out of the way.  You, I, and everyone else, is going to die.  An inescapable fact of life.  We will die.

A morbid thought?  I don’t think it has to be a morbid thought, as much as an organizing thought.

Reality.

It brings things into focus.

Years ago, I met a man who was dying from cancer.  He was focused, determined.  His prognosis was terminal, so that was not his determination.  He was determined to live out the rest of his life to the fullest.  He spent his time working on projects dear to him.  He made apologies and amends to those whom he felt he had hurt.  He was letting his loved ones know they were loved.

His imminent death gave him focus.

One day, he turned to me, after I told him how much I respected how he was facing death, and said, “What about YOUR death?”

“What?,” I asked.  I wasn’t the one dying, after all.

Then he said, “YOU are going to die, too.  Maybe after me, maybe before me.  But you will die, too.  Don’t wait.  There may be no waiting.”

Death has a way of rearranging your priorities.

Listen to this week’s podcast to ponder death and YOUR life.

My coaching client was wanting to thrive.  He told me he was constantly studying about self-growth.  But he wanted to really transform his life.  And, he told me, so much of what he was reading was, to quote him, “woo-woo stuff.”  He used that term as a reference to ideas he thought were “out there.”

So first, let me just say, what is “out there” to one person is commonplace and sensible to another.  But I knew what he was saying.  He wanted to change things in his life… but he wanted it based in research and reliability.  He wanted to get it down to the basics.

I told him we could easily look at the “low hanging fruit,” the easy things to accomplish — the ones that give the biggest bang for the effort… pretty much guaranteed.

In this episode of the Thriveology Podcast, I outline 4 areas to improve, all in very “non-woowoo” ways… and very simple ways… so that you can get the biggest bang for your efforts.

Listen in for the details!

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What’s your WHY?  Your BIG WHY?  Why you are here.  The WHY that is your life purpose?

I think we all have one… even if we haven’t found it yet.  It’s there.  Within us.  Your first task is to find it.  That’s important.  But finding it isn’t enough.  Second, you have to move toward it, work toward it… try to fulfill it.  If it is big enough, it may just take you the rest of your life!

But what could get in your way??

The little “why’s.”  Your questions about “why did this happen?”, “why are things this way?”, “why do I feel this way?”

Those little why’s can drown out the BIG WHY.  It draws our attention away from what is important.  And yet, those little why’s get our attention and energy.  They keep us in circles, chasing after nothing helpful or useful.  Just stuck.

In this episode of the Thriveology Podcast, I discuss our BIG WHY and the little why’s that keep us away from the BIG WHY.

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Life is tough.

Not always.  But along the way.  And even after you get past one struggle, that doesn’t mean there isn’t another one up ahead.  That’s just the nature of life.

It doesn’t mean you are doing anything wrong or that the world, God, or the Universe is out to teach you a lesson.  It’s just the nature of life.

You may notice 2 crowds.  First is the “Grind Culture” that just says to suck it up, keep on grinding, and MAKE it work.  They have a point that you have to get through some tough times.  But sometimes, it is wise to step back and ask if the fight is worth it.

Then there is the “Sign Culture.”  That group tells you that any struggle is an indication you are on the wrong path, that something is wrong with you, and that life “should” be easy… if you are doing it right.  They have a point that sometimes, a struggle is pointing to you moving the wrong way… swimming upstream.  But the fact is, life means struggles… at times.

So what do you do to hold up when life gets you down?

We discuss it… and 5 things to do… on this episode of the Thriveology Podcast.  Listen below.

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Here we go!  The old year has passed, and the new year stretches before us… full of possibility and potential.  Let’s talk about how to Thrive in ’25!

In this episode, I’ll tell you where I have been, and where the podcast is headed.  I’ve got lots of great stuff coming your way, and am excited to share it with you.

Also in this episode, I tell you the 3 A’s of what you can control, so you can start applying that RIGHT NOW.

Stay tuned for future episodes!

And listen to this episode below.

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Just a little rant here:  philosophy classes turn off many college students for a simple reason — they never get around to saying how philosophy can shake your living.  Some classes might teach more on “how to think philosophically,” or “here are the old philosophers.”  Some may speak to ethics or arguments, logic or some other esoteric area.  But how to live, day-to-day?  That is often lost to the student.

(By they way, I would offer this as an issue with much of theology, too.  Lots of talk about what not to do, what God (or gods) might be like, and how to judge how others live… but not so much clarity on living day-to-day.  But that is a rant for another day!)

Anyway, philosophy, as originally taught in ancient days, was exactly for deciding how to live.  How should you act, feel, and think?  As different schools of philosophy might point out, that all depends upon your basic ideas of what a meaningful life might be.

Sometimes, we are already acting in ways that point to our idea of meaning, even without a philosophical basis.  I think of this as our “natural philosophy” — how we have made sense of the world.

After my first book, many people asked if I was a Stoic.  At that time, I had only a passing concept of that philosophy.  Just one of those old schools of philosophy from a bygone age.  But after hearing it a number of times, I started investigating.  Sure enough, much of my approach to living day-to-day was Stoic.  Huh.

Then, I started finding others that had this same experience.  One of those is Vitaliy Katsenelson.  He is the CEO of an investment company.  But his story goes back to his family’s immigration to the United States, from Russia, when Vitaliy was a child.  He was old enough to still remember those memories of a dying USSR (and to hold onto a bit of an accent), but young enough to find his way through American culture.

After writing several books on investing (including the psychology of investing), Vitaliy took to talking about life.  Not just professional life.  But other areas of life.  Art, music, chess, and family life were grist for the mill of exploring meaning.

This led to Vitaliy’s latest book, Soul In The Game.  While in the process of writing, Vitaliy stumbled upon Stoic thought and found a new home there.  He incorporates that into this book, to further his exploration into the meaningful life (a slightly different question than the meaning of life).

I had a chance to sit down and chat with Vitaliy about a wide range of issues and topics, all related to how life becomes meaningful, and how to find that meaning.  Listen to this episode of the Thriveology Podcast to find out more.

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Do you micro-quit?  I sure do.  And I need to quit micro-quitting!  Maybe you do, too.

It undermines my goals (and likely, your goals too).  And it keeps you from thriving.

What is micro-quitting?  Well, if you quit something (an activity, a job, a sport, a hobby, etc.), you stop doing it.  You step away from it.

But when you micro-quit, you don’t follow through on the smaller building blocks of the bigger thing.  You don’t quit.  But you chip away at that bigger thing.

For example, you are exercising.  Maybe you like to.  Maybe you want to be in better shape.  But either way, you have decided to exercise.

You set your alarm for an early workout.  It goes off.  You decide to hit the snooze button and do a shorter session.  Or you give up on that next set of reps.  Even though it was in your plan… and it was your intention to do it.  You don’t.  You micro-quit on that plan, on that action.

And in the process, you may be undermining your goals.  A little at a time, a micro-quit at a time.

It might just be keeping you and me from thriving!

I discuss micro-quitting (and how to micro-commit) in this episode of the Thriveology Podcast.  Listen below.

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The Thrive Code

Over the past 7 episodes, we have been building our Thrive Code.  The code to follow that allows us to thrive, and also the code that runs your system, like computer code.  And we are closing in on the finish line!

We bring the series to an end in this episode. The final piece of the Thrive Code is all about how we feel about others.  Do we see others as “other” or as connected to us?  Do we use compassion or do we objectify?

I have a built in belief that we are born with compassion.  Babies and children have a natural compassionate response to others in pain.  But many times, people are taught to not have a compassionate response.  We are taught beliefs about why others are having problems.  Often, those beliefs are based in blame and condemnation.

It is no surprise, then, that we are living in a compassion crisis.  Both in terms of compassion for others and self-compassion.

Is there a way back?  Yes!  And it starts with understanding exactly what compassion is, where it comes from, why we lose it, and how we can cultivate it.  Learn more in this episode of the Thriveology Podcast.

Listen below.

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The Thrive Code

Did you ever have one of those Magic 8-Balls when you were growing up?  I never had one, but a friend down the street did.  You were supposed to ask Yes/No questions of the ball, then turn it over and a die would float to the surface, revealing your answer.

For whatever reason, we could spend lots of time asking a question, shaking and flipping the 8-Ball, and study our answer.  Of course, if we didn’t like the answer, we would just shake it again and get another answer.

On a side note, I always wondered why an 8 ball from billiards was ever supposed to be “magical” in answering questions.  I recently read that Brunswick Billiards bought the rights to the toy as some point.  So, no, nothing magical about an 8 ball, except for the billiards company being involved!

Anyway, there was this one answer that always left me frustrated:  Reply hazy, try again.

Naturally, I would.  I’d just shake again and try for another answer.  But I remember this one time… I just kept getting the same answer — Reply hazy, try again.  So, I kept trying again.  And I didn’t get anywhere!

Well, life can be that way.  When things aren’t clear, it can be frustrating and paralyzing.  If we don’t have clarity about some decisions, sometimes we do nothing.

It turns out that having some clarity helps to make life easier. It helps us to thrive.

But, and this is important, seeking clarity is quite a help in thriving.  In fact, when we seek clarity, we tend to find enough of it to move forward.  And sense clarity changes over time, you do have to keep seeking it.  What was clear… what made sense… at one point or stage in life, may no longer make sense at another point.  So, we have to keep seeking clarity — and finding it along the way.

This is the code.  The Thrive Code.

Listen for more about seeking clarity below.

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