Thriving in the Midst of Chaos: Parenting With Special Needs Kids

Episode 84: Divorce and Special Needs Children With Guest Jackie Harounian

In this episode, we discuss divorce while having children with special needs. Guest Jacqueline Harounian, Esq, has found that her field has become very busy during COVID, with an increase in fighting, domestic violence, mental health issues, and substance abuse leading to divorce. A lot depends on the couple, how well they communicate, and whether they are willing to see eye to eye on a lot of issues affecting special needs children. To avoid divorce, keep the lines of communication. More divorced families are using joint custody. The better the attitude of the family, the easier the divorce will be on the children.

When one is divorcing and has children, it is important that parents agree on where the children live and how they will be supported. The goal for divorce should be to avoid court, for the two parents to reach an agreement without a judge. It is best if parents work out their own schedule based on the needs of the child, replicate the schedule that was going on before the divorce, and see which parent is available when and what they are able to do or help with. If parents cannot do it themselves, it would be beneficial to sit down together with a coach, mediatory, or lawyer. Cases that go to trial are very costly.

For a divorce where children have special needs, sometimes one parent disagrees with the diagnosis or treatment, doesn't think that a medication or treatment is necessary, parents disagree on vaccines, or there is a major issue and the parties don't agree and one parent doesn't agree with the doctor or medical advice.

Joint custody occurs when the parents equally split the time and resources with the children. It requires that the parents communicate well, get along well, and live in the same school district. Because everything is equal, no one pays child support.

Everyone reacts to divorce differently, impacted by the interactions and relationships of the parents, unresolved anger, and the desire to blame and shame one another. Counseling is beneficial for couples. For those with children with special needs, there is the added concern of finances, so compromising and budgeting in important. To manage financial hardship, get bank statements and tax returns in order, get your finances in order, get paystubs, create a budget, start to have conversations with your co-parent about the timeline, and discuss what you are going to do with your assets.

To make the divorce process easier on the parents, ask for help, reach out to family and friends, ask for breaks, try new things in your life, try to have a team approach with your team, try to be united in how your raise your child, practice forgiveness, maintain a positive attitude, maintain consistency, and improve communication with your co-parent.

To best explain divorce to children with special needs, do the announcement with your partner, in a non-emotional way, and at a time where the children have time to ask questions and have a chance to react, don't make the announcement too early, and don't tell them more than they need to know. Consider making the announcement on the weekend so the child has time to adjust to the information.

The impact of divorce on the child is dependent on the child and the age of the child. Consider conferring with your child's therapist before making the announcement. Be mindful of their schedules and routines and minimize disruptions and changes in routines. Account for the child's own stressors and preferences. With children with special needs, it is even more important to keep everything consistent. Consider psychotherapy for the children.

Keep in mind, it is not about winning, it is about moving forward. Parents can help their children cope by not fighting in front of them, not discussing financials in front of the child, not letting others talk negatively about the situation, not disagreeing in front of them, trying to reach an agreement on custody as soon as possible, and not focusing on the financials first. Easier and less expensive ways to divorce include using a mediator or doing collaborative law.

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Divorce Reality Check Book

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Show Music:

Intro Outro: Intro Outro 2 by Mattias Lahoud under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Theme Song: 90s rock style by monkeyman535 under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Self Care Song: Green and Orange No Water by Duncan Alex under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Hosted by: Jessica Temple

Disclaimer: Our show is not designed to provide listeners with specific or personal legal, medical, or professional services or advice. Parents of children with health issues should always consult their health care provider for medical advice, medication, or treatment.

Copyright 2021 Jessica Temple

Episode 83: Momming With Autism With Guest Alicia Trautwein

In this episode, we discuss raising children with special needs and different diagnoses. Alicia Trautwein has 4 children, 3 of whom are autistic. Alicia was diagnosed with autism at age 33, after her children were formally diagnosed. She knew that something was different about herself but doctors provided her with numerous incorrect diagnoses. However, for 3 years prior to her official diagnosis, she started to suspect that she had autism, due to similarities between her and her children. She found it very challenging to find someone to assess and evaluate her for autism. Her brother was also diagnosed with autism, but Alicia was an adult by the time he was diagnosed. Regarding parent, she learned from her brother to take things with a grain of salt. Benefits of having autism and raising children who have autism is understanding where they are coming from and understanding what they don't quite understand, seeing and comprehending the bigger picture of what is happening with her children, figuring out her children's triggers, knowing how to balance everyone' sensory needs, figuring out how to navigate everyone's general needs, seeing things from a different perspective, celebrating the small things, and slowing down.

To parent children with special needs, she recommends developing and establishing routines, having predictable routines, reducing unnecessary surprises, using visual schedules, blaming the schedule rather than yourself, and giving transition warnings. For resources, she recommends using tiktok for educational information about diagnoses and support, using fidget toys, and using social stories.

She knew her son had a special need upon his birth as he did not make eye contact and lost all language at age 19 months, and then she got him involved with early intervention. He had his autism evaluation and received his diagnosis at 2 years old. He immediately started speech therapy. Her daughter was always advanced in her milestones, but Alicia still knew that something was going on. Her daughter was misdiagnosed for a long time. Her other daughter had speech delays and went through speech therapy as a young child. After her son was diagnosed, her daughters were both diagnosed. It was at the appointment when her oldest daughter with autism was diagnosed that the doctor brought up to Alicia that she might be autistic. Her older children got involved with Horse therapy and psychotherapy.

To bolster relationships, communication is key. Ask for breaks, rely on your social support, take advantage of help, and use respite care. To manage everything, only book what needs to be scheduled, space things out, don't overschedule, focus on what works best, use a family/shared calendar, put everything in the calendar, have older kids help out if they can, consider also keeping a paper calendar, and put things on the calendar as soon as they are scheduled.

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Tiktok

Pop it

Teachers pay teachers

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Please subscribe to our podcast in the iTunes store, or wherever you find your podcasts, Leave us a 5-star review, to help us know what you like and what you don't like, and to make sure other like-minded people find support through this podcast.

Show Music:

Intro Outro: Intro Outro 2 by Mattias Lahoud under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Theme Song: 90s rock style by monkeyman535 under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Self Care Song: Green and Orange No Water by Duncan Alex under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Hosted by: Jessica Temple

Disclaimer: Our show is not designed to provide listeners with specific or personal legal, medical, or professional services or advice. Parents of children with health issues should always consult their health care provider for medical advice, medication, or treatment.

Copyright 2021 Jessica Temple

Bonus Episode: Special Needs Superheros with Guest John Besold

In this episode, we discuss special needs superheros. Guest John Besold always believed in helping others, but when he experienced polymyosistis in 1999, his eyes were opened to the special needs world, during his several weeks hospital stay. His experience inspired him to write SPARQE. He decided to write a book where kids had special abilities rather than special needs. This book is best for kids ages 10-15, but can be useful for adults as well.

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Netflix show

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Show Music:

Intro Outro: Intro Outro 2 by Mattias Lahoud under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Theme Song: 90s rock style by monkeyman535 under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Self Care Song: Green and Orange No Water by Duncan Alex under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Hosted by: Jessica Temple

Disclaimer: Our show is not designed to provide listeners with specific or personal legal, medical, or professional services or advice. Parents of children with health issues should always consult their health care provider for medical advice, medication, or treatment.

Copyright 2021 Jessica Temple

Episode 82: Adoption Of Special Needs Children with Guest Dr. John Cranham

In this episode, Dr. John Cranham discuss adoption of special needs children. His son Cornell was born at 23 weeks. He spent the first 6 months of his life on a ventilator and trached before moving to a transitional unit. John's wife initially worked with Cornell in the hospital as his therapist, and then decided that they should take him home as a foster child. They thought about it for a while, and then decided to move forward with it. They went through 2 months of training. Cornell initially required, PT, OT, speech, PEG tube, trach, and nursing care. When he was around 2, the ENT found that the tissue around the trach site was closed off and air wasn't getting to his vocal cords. He then required surgery, which did not go well, leading to him stopping breathing frequently. It took another year to take the trach out and do the next surgery. At age 11, he was having difficulty breathing again and found that the trachea area hadn't grown, and he needed surgery to fix it. John couldn't meet Cornell until he was approved to be a foster parent when Cornell was more than 1 year old. Even though it was incredibly challenging, he found a lot of joy in going to see him. He had to do an overnight stay with Cornell in the hospital, which John found frightening at first. For a while, John had a lot of doubts. Over time, Cornell began to really feel like theirs. They experienced joy, fear, sadness, loss of your life.

John and his wife decided to adopt Cornell after his 2nd birthday, he went into respiratory distress, they didn't think Cornell was going to make it, John started reflecting on his own resilience, he thought Cornell was going to pass away, and then a few seconds later, Cornell started fighting even harder. Then John decided that if Cornell could fight that hard, John was willing to fight for him. Early after the adoption, they went to see a psychologist, who told them that it was important to tell Cornell about the adoption before age 5.

Creating an IEP for him was challenging. Educationally, they had such a bad time moving him from Kindergarten to first grade that they took him out of public school. After attending a special school through 6th grade, he went back to the public school. There, he attended some inclusion classes and some special education classes.

Socially, Cornell was in an unusual place because he didn't fit in with mainstream or special education children, so he didn't have a lot of friends growing up. Nowadays, he has a larger social group through his religious organization.

For the transition to adulthood, Cornell had difficulty coping because his younger sister was able to go off to college and he wasn't. However, he was able to attend a rehab facility which had some similarities to college, and Cornell really enjoyed it. To learn to drive, Cornell practiced with simulators, and persisted with trying to take the written test. He currently still lives at home, but does laundry, cooks dinner for the family twice per week, and is working on getting ready to go out and live on his own.

John coped by working at work really hard, using nursing care, respite care. Themes in the book include not comparing himself to others (comparison is the enemy of contentment), persistence, perseverance, purpose and passion, and embracing your obstacles as your biggest gifts.

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The Cornell Effect: A Family's Journey towards Happiness, Fulfillment and Peace

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Show Music:

Intro Outro: Intro Outro 2 by Mattias Lahoud under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Theme Song: 90s rock style by monkeyman535 under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Self Care Song: Green and Orange No Water by Duncan Alex under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Hosted by: Jessica Temple

Disclaimer: Our show is not designed to provide listeners with specific or personal legal, medical, or professional services or advice. Parents of children with health issues should always consult their health care provider for medical advice, medication, or treatment.

Copyright 2021 Jessica Temple

Episode 81: All About Dyslexia With Guest Lizzie Shearing

Today, we discuss all things dyslexia. Guest Lizzie Shearing discusses that dyslexia is a reading learning disability. Individuals process written words differently in their brain, such that they rely on the left frontal lobe, rather than more on the left posterior areas of their brain. They show inefficient patterns of brain activity. Dyslexia occurs in 1 in 10 people. Symptoms include difficulty with reading, reluctance to read out loud or to read at all, reading being slow, reading fluency being slow, reduced awareness of patterns of words, spelling difficulty, and difficulty remembering words (working memory and phonological memory). Symptoms parents can look out for include difficulty following multistep directions, poor working memory, a delayed ability to read, misreading words, guessing words and rushing through, spelling difficulty, event sequencing difficulty, labored reading, and choosing not to read. Educational psychologists and dyslexia specialists can make the diagnosis. It cannot be a pediatrician who diagnoses. To make the diagnosis, they assess working memory, handwriting, reading fluency, spelling, and IQ. They also need to rule out visual difficulties, including Irlen syndrome, as well as hearing impairments. The earlier a child is diagnosed, the better things are for them, including emotionally. The earlier a child enters treatment for dyslexia and the more treatment they get, the better the outcome.

Treatments include going back to the beginning and making sure the child has grasped and mastered all the skills that they have been previously taught, a cumulative structured phonics program, filling in all the gaps, inference learning, trying to visualize scenes, and support with reading fluency. If children don't get treatment, they tend to experience anxiety.

Regarding school, accommodations can be helpful, including differentiated teaching across lessons, list of spelling for key vocabulary, writing frame provided for the student, use of voice to text, use of bullet points rather than writing essays, extra time on tests, prompting, and rest breaks. Other helpful tools are quizlet/flashcards. Tech accommodations include immersive readers and dictation.

To help their kids, parents can encourage reading in any form, use audiobooks and read along with it, obtain specialist support for your child, make sure the specialist has a good relationship with your child, use google books, and use audiobooks from the library. To emotionally support children with dyslexia, help your child develop a growth mindset, help promote resilience, and help your child find a hobby they love.

Links:

Linked in

Dyslexia Buddies

SEN Buddy

Irlen syndrome

Orton Gillingham

Quizlet.com

Barrington Stoke

Carol Dweck: Growth Mindset

Simple Habit App

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Please subscribe to our podcast in the iTunes store, or wherever you find your podcasts, Leave us a 5-star review, to help us know what you like and what you don't like, and to make sure other like-minded people find support through this podcast.

Show Music:

Intro Outro: Intro Outro 2 by Mattias Lahoud under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Theme Song: 90s rock style by monkeyman535 under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Self Care Song: Green and Orange No Water by Duncan Alex under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Hosted by: Jessica Temple

Disclaimer: Our show is not designed to provide listeners with specific or personal legal, medical, or professional services or advice. Parents of children with health issues should always consult their health care provider for medical advice, medication, or treatment.

Copyright 2021 Jessica Temple

Episode 80: LGBTQ In the Autism Community With Guest Danielle Sullivan

In this episode, Danielle Sullivan discusses the gender and sexuality spectrum in the autism community. LGBTQ is very common in the autism community. There is also a high number of individuals who are autistic in the LGBTQ community. Individuals in the LGBTQ community have a higher likelihood of depression, anxiety, and suicidality as are individuals who are autistic. Therefore, support is really important. Start talking to your children about gender early. Start talking with young children about pronouns and demonstrate use of pronouns respectfully in daily life. Identify people you don't know with "they." Show that you get to decide your own gender and pronouns. Use the pronouns people ask you to use for them. Talk about how different bodies are different. Read books to the kids about conception and birth that are not gendered. Let them know that just because a body looks a certain way, we can't assume that we know the status of the body's reproductive organs. Read diverse books and watch diverse TV. Remember, you will not hurt your child by talking to them about sex. The more familiar they are with their body, the less likely they will experience sexual assault. Sex education is important. Start it at home at an age appropriate level. Don't depend on school sex ed.

To support your child in coming out, know your location (state/country) and if it safe. Show your child that you know they are valid and you see them and you know them and one day it will be safe to come out. If your child is one of the first trans kids in their school to come out, consider going into the school and talking to the teacher and principal ahead of time to tell them about their pronouns and answer any questions they have. Provide them with a list of commonly asked questions and ways they can answer them, if other children have questions. Consider doing an informative presentation with your child in their class. Find support groups online. Find LGBTQ friends for your children.

In her experience, most kids disclose easily to their friends, with relatively little difficulty. Talk with your child that fitting in may not be the goals, but rather being your authentic self may be their goal. Children may even already have a friend who has come out. For younger kids, just reassure them that they are loved and supported. A friend will be your friend regardless of what you are dressed in or wearing makeup and if not, they are bad friends. A friend supports you and is there for you.

For coming out to family, the child's joy and wellbeing may be more important to you than what family members think, or their opinions. Family are grownups and are responsible for themselves. You are the parent and are responsible for your child's wellbeing. It is your job as a parent to support your child. If a child's gender and sexuality are not being authenticated, suicide rates rise. It is your job as a parent to inform your child that there is nothing wrong with them. They are celebrated for who they are. Anyone who has a problem with that, is the problem.

To support your children, listen to them. Get them in groups with other autistic peers and/or support or friends group with other LGBTQ children. Local autism society chapters often have peer social groups for children and teens. Ask other parents where they are getting their support. Consider therapists for autistic LBGTQ support.

To reduce transphobia and homophobia in the community, try to get the school library to have LGBTQ resources in it, see if the school can celebrate LGBTQ holidays. Ensure that the school is offering disciplinary behavior to exclusionary or discriminatory teachers. Get support from other parents and group up to make your voices heard. As far as therapists, they are supposed to be supporting your child. If they are homophobic, they are actively harming your child. It is helpful to decide if the therapy they are doing is worth the damage there are doing to your child.

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Books:

Julian is a Mermaid by Jessica Love

What Makes A Baby by Cory Silverberg

I Am Jazz by Jessica Herthel and Jazz Jennings

It Feels Good To Be Yourself By Teresa Thorn and Nicke Grigni

Podcast Episodes

One Bad Mother Episode 383

One Bad Mother Episode 385

One Bad Mother Episode 388

Organization for Autism Research

Sex Ed for Self Advocates

Autistic Women and Nonbinary network

Trans Autistic Healthcare guide

The Autistic Self Advocacy Network

Guide to Holding Inclusive Events

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Please subscribe to our podcast in the iTunes store, or wherever you find your podcasts, Leave us a 5-star review, to help us know what you like and what you don't like, and to make sure other like-minded people find support through this podcast.

Show Music:

Intro Outro: Intro Outro 2 by Mattias Lahoud under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Theme Song: 90s rock style by monkeyman535 under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Self Care Song: Green and Orange No Water by Duncan Alex under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Hosted by: Jessica Temple

Disclaimer: Our show is not designed to provide listeners with specific or personal legal, medical, or professional services or advice. Parents of children with health issues should always consult their health care provider for medical advice, medication, or treatment.

Copyright 2021 Jessica Temple

Episode 79: Living With Autism While Parenting Special Needs Kids With Guest Danielle Sullivan

In this episode, we discuss inclusivity, organizational tools for special needs parents, and living as a parent with autism. Guest Danielle Sullivan discusses that all places should be as accessible and inclusive as possible, even for invisible disabilities. The world needs to consider light, noise, and visual clutter as well as physical disabilities. Listen to others when they suggest ways to be more inclusive. Awareness is key. Acknowledge and expect that people will behave differently. Model acceptance of different kinds of behaviors. Remember, differences are not harmful, they are just differences. Consider doing presentations in your child's classroom about neurodiversity to assist with open-mindedness for the other children. Get involved in your local education system to see what change you can make toward inclusivity. Advocate for sensory friendly times and activities in your area. Suggest that paces offer sensory friendly bags with headphones and other sensory friendly objects. Clinics that offer autism evaluations could provide more evaluators to ensure it takes less time to get an autism evaluation.

Danielle was diagnosed with autism as an adult, as once her oldest child was diagnosed with ASD, as she began to see a lot of herself in him. She experienced depression and anxiety and sensory meltdowns (which she thought were panic attacks). It was helpful for her to find out that she was autistic. As far as having a leg-up on parenting, she feels that she understands her son well, and can figure out why he gets stuck and how to help him through it. She understood him better when he was learning to talk. They both have sensory processing and auditory issues, think in certain similar ways, are sensitive to certain stimuli, and have similar difficulties with social niceties, which helps her to be closer to her son and be able to parent him with more understanding.

She finds it helpful to be able to hyperfixate when needed. She finds it helpful to notice what is absolutely necessary and not necessary for interacting with others, prioritizing, and maximizing her use of her energy with her kids, prioritizing their sensory needs. The biggest challenge of having autism and parenting is the amount of noise, touch overwhelm, the effects of sleep deprivation hits her differently, and more difficulty adapting to changes in routine. Coping skills that have helped her include neurodiversity resources, focusing on scheduling, prioritizing basic needs, reducing sensory input, setting up signals to her partner that she needs a break, getting headphones and earplugs for herself, having sensory fidgets, and explaining her triggers to her kids. To help her child with auditory processing disorder, she may touch him or physically guide him to help him follow instructions, touch him on the shoulder, get in his space to make sure he realizes she is there, get closer to him, make sure he sees her mouth, repeat herself as needed, slow down, enunciate, turn off other noise, and make sure he has noticed that she is talking to him.

For creating household systems for neurodivergent individuals, she uses a loose routine, smaller routines that she can use at points during the day but are adaptable, breaks things down based on their priority to the family, focuses on what the kids need, builds in breaks, and has helpers like a list of food options, a list for every room she needs to clean, a shared google calendar, communication apps, and lots of lists. These systems can from trial and error and figuring out where she ran into problems the most.

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Please subscribe to our podcast in the iTunes store, or wherever you find your podcasts, Leave us a 5-star review, to help us know what you like and what you don't like, and to make sure other like-minded people find support through this podcast.

Show Music:

Intro Outro: Intro Outro 2 by Mattias Lahoud under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Theme Song: 90s rock style by monkeyman535 under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Self Care Song: Green and Orange No Water by Duncan Alex under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Hosted by: Jessica Temple

Disclaimer: Our show is not designed to provide listeners with specific or personal legal, medical, or professional services or advice. Parents of children with health issues should always consult their health care provider for medical advice, medication, or treatment.

Copyright 2021 Jessica Temple

Episode 78: A Blind View With Guest Ashley Wayne

In this episode, Ashley Wayne discusses parenting children with special needs through the lens of blindness. Ashley was born blind, as were her two older children. Her son also has cerebral palsy. She was initially worried about how she would be able to parent while blind. However, no one else appeared concerned, so she pressed on. She had done some babysitting in the past, and it hadn't gone well. However, she found successful ways to parent by trial and error. She found that her children being blind actually made learning to parent easier. She found that her own experience was helpful in teaching her children tips and tricks to make living with blindness easier. To help her she uses braille labels, a braille tablet, Facebook groups and support, taking her time, and a screen reader. She has found it helpful for the kids to use a braille typewriter. She copes by enjoying silence, drinking soda, prayer, social support, and dates with her husband. She recommends taking it one day at a time, letting the children go at their own pace, and reaching out to others.

Facebook: A Blind View by Ashley Wayne

Shriners hospital

National Federation for the blind

Braille bookstore

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Please subscribe to our podcast in the iTunes store, or wherever you find your podcasts, Leave us a 5-star review, to help us know what you like and what you don't like, and to make sure other like-minded people find support through this podcast.

Show Music:

Intro Outro: Intro Outro 2 by Mattias Lahoud under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Theme Song: 90s rock style by monkeyman535 under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Self Care Song: Green and Orange No Water by Duncan Alex under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Hosted by: Jessica Temple

Disclaimer: Our show is not designed to provide listeners with specific or personal legal, medical, or professional services or advice. Parents of children with health issues should always consult their health care provider for medical advice, medication, or treatment.

Copyright 2021 Jessica Temple

Episode 77: Shaping Our Children Through Reading With Guest Sara Bradford

In this episode, guest Sara Bradford discusses how children can benefit from reading children's books about special needs. Her daughter has dyslexia and her older two children, as well as her husband, have autism. She discussed finding out during quarantine that her younger daughter has dyslexia, as school never picked it up. Sara chose to write children's books about differences to make sure children could see themselves in the books, to explain the conditions they experience, and to provide information to other children. She also found it helpful, since she has physical differences as well, and was bullied for it as a child. She hopes to help discontinue bullying in future generations. Writing her books has inspired her daughter to publish her own book. Her books are written for children in preschool through third grade. Books such as this can help the children to understand their own emotional maturity and the emotional wellbeing of the children with special needs. She would recommend having the teachers read the books to the kids and having them in the class library. Parents can read them as bedtime stories and place them in community libraries.

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Please subscribe to our podcast in the iTunes store, or wherever you find your podcasts, Leave us a 5-star review, to help us know what you like and what you don't like, and to make sure other like-minded people find support through this podcast.

Show Music:

Intro Outro: Intro Outro 2 by Mattias Lahoud under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Theme Song: 90s rock style by monkeyman535 under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Self Care Song: Green and Orange No Water by Duncan Alex under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Hosted by: Jessica Temple

Disclaimer: Our show is not designed to provide listeners with specific or personal legal, medical, or professional services or advice. Parents of children with health issues should always consult their health care provider for medical advice, medication, or treatment.

Copyright 2021 Jessica Temple

Episode 76: Live Like Sean With Guest TJ Nelligan

In this episode, we discuss living like Sean; living your best life. When Sean was young, he was diagnosed with an intellectual disability. Guest TJ Nelligan initially began mourning the child he thought he was going to have. After that, life got busy managing doctor appointments, medications, and therapy appointments. A friend later told him about Special Olympics. TJ and Sean went to check it out and loved it. They and their entire family quickly became involved in the organization.

Through raising Sean, TJ learned lots of lessons. The first was to advocate for your child by heavily researching and visiting schools to find the right fit for your child and then get involved in that school. Will this school meet the needs of your child and maximize their ability through the school's resources? When an issue arose, TJ never backed down.

Another lesson is be present. Sean always lived in the moment, which made everyone he met feel special and seen. By being present, Sean made lots of friends and enjoyed every moment of his life. It also led him to some really exciting experiences that wouldn't have occurred had he not lived in the moment. Gratitude is another lesson. Sean only focused on his strengths, which led him to be a grateful person. Tying that with being in the moment, he woke up every day with a great outlook and enjoyed every day. Over time, this led TJ to see Sean's strengths, rather than deficits. Sean taught TJ to be happy. Find your passion and it will bring you happiness. You can make your own happiness by being in the moment. Happiness is a journey, not a destination. Ignore the destination and work on the journey. To stay in the moment, TJ now focuses only on what he can accomplish that day. Allow your child to inspire you. For TJ, that was in part from the Special Olympics. He found that that organization and unified sports really helped. These led to so much more kindness. TJ found it important to include TJ and everything. Make sure the children have time around their peers and spend time in the community. Help your child find their passion.

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Show Music:

Intro Outro: Intro Outro 2 by Mattias Lahoud under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Theme Song: 90s rock style by monkeyman535 under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Self Care Song: Green and Orange No Water by Duncan Alex under CC-BY 3.0 License (www.freesound.org)

Hosted by: Jessica Temple

Disclaimer: Our show is not designed to provide listeners with specific or personal legal, medical, or professional services or advice. Parents of children with health issues should always consult their health care provider for medical advice, medication, or treatment.

Copyright 2021 Jessica Temple