Long before alcohol entered the picture, something else was already shaping the story. Drew goes back to childhood medical trauma, vulnerability, and fear—experiences that taught his nervous system how to cope before he had words for it. This episode asks a harder question: what if the behavior wasn’t the beginning?

The consequences don’t arrive all at once—they stack. Drew shares what happened when his body finally gave out and survival took over. Hospital stays, fear, and the weight of facing what years of coping had done. This is the chapter where reality stops negotiating.

There’s a point where something changes quietly. Drew describes the shift from drinking because he wanted to drinking because he had to. The excuses still sound reasonable, but the control is already gone. This episode captures the realization most people don’t notice until they’re already past it.

How close can a person come to losing everything—and still come back?

Drew’s story is a raw look at what happens when alcohol slowly takes over a life without announcing itself. When survival replaces purpose. When rage, fear, and instinct sit just beneath the surface—waiting for the wrong moment.

This episode isn’t about labels or lectures. It’s about the quiet lies we tell ourselves, the patterns no one sees from the outside, and the moment you realize you’re standing closer to the edge than you ever thought possible.

Drew speaks openly about addiction, violence, responsibility, and the moment that forced him to confront who he had become—and who he still wanted to be. He also talks about recovery in a way that’s rarely shared: not as a finish line, but as a daily decision with real stakes.

If you’ve ever wondered whether a habit, a mindset, or a version of yourself might be costing more than you’re willing to admit, this conversation will hit hard.

Listen to Drew’s full episode on Through the Rough.

At 29 years old, Tessa’s life split into two versions of itself in a single moment.

While driving 70 miles per hour on a busy interstate, she suffered a massive stroke—losing control of her body, her future, and everything she believed defined her. What followed wasn’t just a fight to survive physically, but a much deeper battle with blame, identity, and self-worth.

This trailer offers a glimpse into Tessa’s journey as shared on Through the Rough—from the terror of that first moment, through the crushing weight of believing it was her fault, to the slow and painful realization that the story she told herself wasn’t true.

As her brain rewired and her body rebuilt, Tessa was forced to confront a question most of us never stop to ask:
If you lose what you do, who are you underneath it?

This is a story about trauma, clarity, and rebuilding a life from the inside out.
Not by becoming who you were—but by discovering who you are.

https://open.spotify.com/episode/7ap0CoG5EzmPcoKWW7tKhF?si=b7c81e80486340eb

What happens when the systems you trust—your body, your safety nets, your sense of control—fail all at once?

In this deep dive, we go beyond the surface of Tessa’s story and slow everything down. We examine the moments before the stroke, the overlooked warning signs, and the cascade of failures that followed—from a drugging event in a “safe” space, to paralysis at highway speed, to a 911 call that never helped.

But this episode isn’t just about what happened to Tessa. It’s about what was exposed.

We unpack how shame delayed critical decisions, how false assumptions around alcohol and responsibility distorted reality, and how medical systems miss what they aren’t designed to look for. We explore the psychological mechanics behind dissociation, why Tessa reframed her body as a “meat suit,” and how that separation became a survival tool rather than an escape.

This conversation also dives into identity loss—what happens when your intelligence, independence, and productivity disappear overnight—and the slow, humbling process of rebuilding a life through neuroplasticity, small wins, and accepting help when pride says not to.

At its core, this episode asks a hard question:
If your autopilot shut off tomorrow—your skills, your routines, your physical ability—who would you be underneath all of it?

This is not a medical thriller for shock value.
It’s an examination of awareness, fragility, resilience, and what it actually means to be present in your own life.

⁠https://open.spotify.com/episode/7ap0CoG5EzmPcoKWW7tKhF?si=3c9ce4122f2f4796

At first, nothing feels wrong. Drinking fits into life, friendships, and routines. In this episode, Drew walks through who he was before things started to slip—when alcohol still felt social, manageable, and justified. This is the baseline most people recognize, even if they don’t question it yet.

The hardest part wasn’t learning how to walk or talk again.
It was learning how to ask for help — and believing she was still worth it.

In the final episode of this five-part series, Tessa reflects on what it meant to lose her independence, her confidence, and her sense of identity — and how love, support, and self-compassion slowly rebuilt what fear and shame had taken away.

She speaks honestly about humiliation, pride, suicidal thoughts, and hitting emotional rock bottom. About grieving the person she used to be. And about the moment she realized recovery wasn’t about becoming who she was — but choosing to keep going as someone new.

This episode is about asking for help without seeing yourself as weak.
About redefining self-worth beyond productivity or ability.
And about making the daily choice to keep trying — even when progress is invisible.

After survival, answers, and self-blame, comes the hardest part: rebuilding.

In Part 4, Tessa begins the long process of taking her life back — physically, mentally, and emotionally. She reflects on how the stroke forced her out of autopilot, slowing life down and reshaping how she sees time, presence, and what actually matters.

This episode moves through rehabilitation, fear, and frustration — but also humor, stubborn determination, and unexpected wins. From learning how to walk and talk again, to discovering that music unlocked speech when nothing else could, Tessa shares what it really takes to reclaim independence after everything changes.

This isn’t about returning to who she was.
It’s about discovering who she is now — and realizing she’s stronger than she ever thought.

Part 4 is about resilience, perspective, and choosing to get back up — again and again.

By the time the doctors arrive, Tessa is already convinced of one thing: this is her fault.

In Part 3, the story turns inward. Sitting in a hospital room with her sister and mother, Tessa carries crushing shame — believing her choices, her body, and one bad night are to blame for everything that’s happening.

As tests continue and specialists weigh in, the narrative begins to crack. What felt like a personal failure starts to look like something else entirely. When word comes that other women experienced the same symptoms — the same memory loss, the same violent illness — blame gives way to fear, anger, and uneasy relief.

But answers don’t bring closure. They bring new questions.

This episode explores what happens when responsibility dissolves, identity is shaken, and you’re forced to accept that your brain — your voice, your learning, your sense of self — may never work the same way again.