The ADHDads

To Clean or Not to Clean: Essential Tips for a Clean and Happy Home

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Life is messy. WE are messy. What does it look like to be responsible for ourselves and each other, and how do we get to we over me, as it relates to a clean home, a happy and healthy family environment, and more? The Dads dive into their own personal experiences, and discuss essential tips for a clean and happy home.

It can be tough when those you live with have different ideas of "clean." Here are some tips to have a productive conversation:

Find Common Ground:

  • Shared Vision: Instead of focusing on blame, discuss the benefits of a cleaner space. Maybe it's reduced stress, easier to find things, or a healthier environment.
  • Respect Differences: Acknowledge that everyone has their own comfort level with cleanliness.

    • Open Communication:

    • "I" Statements: Use "I" statements to express how the messiness makes you feel, e.g., "I feel stressed when the dishes pile up in the sink." Avoid accusatory statements like, "You always leave your mess everywhere!"
    • Active Listening: Listen to their perspective too. Maybe they didn't realize how much the mess bothered you, or they have a time crunch for cleaning.

      • Finding Solutions:

      • Cleanliness Standards: Discuss what "clean" means to everyone. Maybe it's not about a spotless house, but having clear pathways and surfaces for essential tasks.
      • Chore Delegation: Work together to create a chore chart that assigns tasks based on preferences and abilities. Maybe someone hates dishes but loves vacuuming.
      • Compromise: Be flexible. Maybe some areas are kept tidier than others, or cleaning schedules are adjusted.

        • Additional Tips:

        • Focus on Teamwork: Frame cleaning as a team effort to maintain a happy and healthy home environment.
        • Positive Reinforcement: Acknowledge and appreciate each other's efforts when someone cleans up.
        • Make it Fun: Play music while cleaning, turn it into a competition, or make it a family activity.

          • Remember, the goal is to find a system that works for everyone. Be patient, understanding, and open to compromise. There are resources online and in libraries about chore charts and creating a cleaning routine for families.


          We Over Me by Khadeen and Devale Ellis

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