The ADHDads

The return of Mr. Anderson! Steve Anderson brought a special treat for our listeners—his Guided Journal for Dads Volume 1: From Vision to Action has been released. Steve has put together thoughtful and provocative writing prompts to challenge men into asking deeper, more introspective questions. Whether you are new to journaling or have been doing it for years, this journal will help you better understand both the ruts you may be in as a parent and what you are doing well. Many of us don’t take the time to dig deep or ask ourselves what self care even looks like. Steve’s journal will have men asking themselves generative questions to uncover the men and fathers that live with intention, leadership, and exemplification for their families and communities. You definitely don’t want to miss this week’s episode of The ADHDads with our special guest Steve Anderson.

The Artist's Way by Julie Cameron

Today, the Dads discuss dishonest harmony—the avoidance of uncomfortable or difficult topics in order to maintain a false sense of harmony.

Here's a breakdown of why dishonest harmony is bad, incorporating insights from various perspectives:

Individual Level:

Relationship Level:

Societal Level:

While the desire for harmony is understandable, prioritizing it over honesty can have detrimental consequences for individuals, relationships, and society as a whole. Open communication, even when difficult, is essential for building strong, healthy, and just connections.

Thanks always for your support. For more episodes, and to contact us, visit theadhdads.com.

Being yelled at can have significant negative psychological effects, particularly when it's a recurring pattern. Today, the Dads discuss the dangers of being the loudest in the room, as well as strategies to being the lowest heartbeat in the room. Here are some common outcomes of being yelled at:

Children are particularly vulnerable to the effects of being yelled at. It can lead to

It's important to note that the impact of being yelled at can vary depending on factors such as the frequency, intensity, and context of the yelling, as well as the individual's resilience and coping mechanisms.

Resource: How to Stop a Meltdown

Let's be real. Screens can take away from quality time, fun in the sun, and the joy of being in the outdoors. Not only does our health experience compromise, but so do our relationships. How do we connect in the summer, and what can we do to take advantage of the outdoors with our neurodiverse family and friends? The dads discuss strategies, and provide some of their favorite activities for the summer, as well as other times of the year.

Structure and Planning:

Embrace the Outdoors:

Creative Activities:

Active Play:

Other Ideas:

Remember:

With a little planning and creativity, you can have a fantastic tech-free summer that your child with ADHD will love!

Some of our favorite things (that may involve some screen time):

Check out Screamfree Parenting for strategies on communicating in constructive ways as you work toward screen-free summertime with your family.

Life is messy. WE are messy. What does it look like to be responsible for ourselves and each other, and how do we get to we over me, as it relates to a clean home, a happy and healthy family environment, and more? The Dads dive into their own personal experiences, and discuss essential tips for a clean and happy home.

It can be tough when those you live with have different ideas of "clean." Here are some tips to have a productive conversation:

Find Common Ground:

Open Communication:

Finding Solutions:

Additional Tips:

Remember, the goal is to find a system that works for everyone. Be patient, understanding, and open to compromise. There are resources online and in libraries about chore charts and creating a cleaning routine for families.

We Over Me by Khadeen and Devale Ellis

The impermanence of life can be a powerful motivator to live fully. Today the Dads talk about a recent loss in the family, the conversation with our kids regarding the loss, and the reminder of the value of today (and every day). Losing a loved one is something we're never fully prepared for, because the memories we created with them remind us why it's so hard to say goodbye.

Here are some ways to approach living a fulfilling life today, knowing that time is precious:

Focus on the Present: Life is a constant flow of moments. By dwelling on the past or worrying about the future, we miss the richness of the present. Practice mindfulness by savoring experiences, appreciating the beauty around you, and being fully present in your interactions.

Pursue Your Passions: What excites you? What brings you joy and a sense of purpose? Make time for activities that light you up, whether it's a hobby, learning a new skill, or creative expression.

Embrace Growth: Life is a journey of learning and evolving. Challenge yourself to step outside your comfort zone, try new things, and learn from your experiences. Growth fosters a sense of accomplishment and keeps life interesting.

Connect with Others: Strong relationships are a cornerstone of a fulfilling life. Spend time with loved ones, nurture your connections, and build a community that supports you.

Give Back: Contributing to something larger than yourself can bring meaning and purpose. Volunteer your time, help others in need, or find a cause you're passionate about.

Here's how you can embrace a full life as loving parents and friends, knowing life is precious:

Prioritize Quality Time: Schedule dedicated time with your loved ones, free from distractions. This could be a family game night, a movie date with your partner, or a simple walk with a friend.

Be Present: Put away your phone and other devices when you're with loved ones. Truly listen to them, engage in conversations, and show genuine interest in their lives.

Create Memories: Plan fun activities or traditions that create lasting memories. This could be anything from a yearly camping trip to a movie marathon at home.

Express Love Openly: Don't take your loved ones for granted. Tell them you love them, give hugs, and express appreciation for their presence in your life.

Focus on the Small Moments: The everyday moments often hold the most significance. Show you care by making breakfast in bed, reading a story to your child, or offering a massage to your partner.

Leave a Positive Legacy: Your actions and interactions shape the lives of those around you. Strive to be patient, kind, and understanding. Teach your children empathy and compassion. Build strong friendships based on trust and support.

Embrace Forgiveness: Life isn't perfect, and disagreements will happen. Practice forgiveness and let go of resentment.

Communicate Openly: Open communication strengthens relationships. Talk about your feelings, concerns, and hopes for the future. Encourage your children to do the same.

Celebrate Each Other: Make an effort to celebrate each other's achievements, big or small. Acknowledge birthdays, graduations, or simply a good day at work.

Show Gratitude: Express gratitude for your loved ones and the time you have together. Thank your children for their laughter, your partner for their support, and your friends for their loyalty.

By focusing on quality time, open communication, and expressing love in the everyday moments, you can create a fulfilling and meaningful life for yourself and your loved ones. Knowing life is temporary can be a gentle reminder to cherish each other and make every moment count.

Thank you for listening, and for your patience as we navigate our own ups and downs of life. We are grateful for your support!

Links

The Spence Children's Anxiety Scale

Child General Anxiety Disorder Self-Test

Screen for Child Anxiety Related Disorders

Sanjay grew up near Compton, California, surrounded by drugs and violence. Today he shares his insights and experience to help men going through life transitions and mid-life crises.

Sanjay's background includes investment banking at J.P. Morgan, business development, film and television production, and much more. He is the author of five award winning children’s books, and he started his own publication company. His books celebrate zen principles and female empowerment, as he has twin daughters.

Sanjay’s passion is coaching men on spirituality, emotional well being, nutrition and physical health, creativity, communication, and regaining a sense of self and fun. On today's episode, the Dads and Sanjay discuss overcoming stress and dissatisfaction through identifying the problem, and taking the steps to achieving a successful, happy, and fulfilled adult life.

Links

https://sanjaynambiarcoaching.com/

Videos

Email Sanjay

Thank you for your support. If you like what you hear, please leave us a review. It helps get the word out.

This week the Dads share strategies on how to respectfully communicate and divvy up chores and responsibilities in the home. A lot of fights in marriage are due to poor communication, and resentment often builds up when we feel we are doing more than our partners. 50/50 in a marriage is ideal, but oftentimes life throws us curve balls and we have to pick up the slack. Learn some strategies and tips on how to plan, communicate, and share the load around the house. The Dads get personal this week with stories from their own lives. You won’t want to miss this week’s episode of The ADHDads.

Today the Dads welcome back superstar Shell Mendelson! Shell is an ADHD career coach who has trained with Richard Bolles, author of What Color is Your Parachute? She helps adults with ADHD navigate career decisions and transitions. She published A Course for ADHD Adults and Teens: Unlock Your Career Path. Mendelson has been on numerous podcasts and helps individuals unlock their purpose and discover true happiness in their careers. This week the Dads discuss with Shell the benefits of advocating for ourselves in our path toward a career, as well as in the workplace. If there's one thing we can stress, it's to advocate for your best self wherever you are, and when you're an adult, you're often at the office. Shell shares with the Dads some strategies to discovering our paths, and making them work for us.

Website

www.careercoachingwithshell.com

Your Next Career Move MasterClass

A Course for ADHD Adults and Teens: Unlock Your Career Path

Purchase on Amazon

We are incredibly grateful for Shell's return to the podcast. If you feel moved to purchase her incredible workbook, please let us know. And as always, thank you for your support!