Figs and Teale share a clip of their first session with a couples therapist. Witness how the ways they miss each other escalates into hurt and blame and then ultimately resolves through the therapist's intervention, then learn how you can navigate out of negative cycles in your relationship.

Timestamps: 

01:00 Introduction to Figs and Teale

04:04 What's in a name: "Come Here To Me" 

08:20 Why this podcast: Witnesses 

9:45 Special tip of the episode: Follow the process 

13:24 Session begins — Figs feels alone with life's difficulties and like he's a failure 

17:26 Turning point: Conflict and hurt (Teale is hurt by Figs' description of her, protests, Figs feels hurt and protests in kind)

20:46 Figs is prompted to reflect back his understanding of Teale's hurt

22:19 Teale feels shame around missing the place Figs was coming from because of her own insecurities

22:33 Moment of humor and connectedness: Figs sees Teale shift into feeling bad about herself

23:21 Figs considers himself to be a difficult person

23:47 Session ends — It's so easy to miss each other

25:59 The snake in the grass: humans focus on the perceived threat

27:45 Shame

29:02 Walking through the cycle

32:46 Turning point: interventions and empathy

33:35 Blaming is not being vulnerable

36:33 Seeing past the mess to the possibility of repair

Visit comeheretomepodcast.com for episode transcripts, social media links, and to subscribe to the mailing list.

If you or someone you love are struggling in your relationship, visit empathi.com for quizzes, courses, and consultations.

If you or someone you love are struggling in your relationship, visit empathi.com for the relationship quiz, courses, and therapy consultations.