Season 2 Episode 17: Looking Back (Season 1), Looking Forward (Season 2) | Tools for Marriage

Tools for Marriage: https://toolsformarriage.com

Are you looking for practical ways to build a stronger, more resilient marriage? Join Trevor and Laura in this special transition episode of the Tools for Marriage podcast as they celebrate the wrap-up of Season 1 and share an exciting look ahead at Season 2!

In this episode, we reflect on the "master class" of wisdom shared by our incredible Season 1 guests—from first responders and ministry leaders to marriage authors. We dive into the most impactful "tools" we’ve learned so far.

Whether you are on the cusp of marriage or have been together for decades, these tangible, Christ-centered tools are designed to help your relationship flourish. Stick around until the end to hear what’s coming in Season 2 as we continue our mission to provide the skills every couple needs but few are taught.

What you’ll learn in this video:

✅ Why we started the Tools for Marriage podcast.

✅ The concept of "Radical Obedience" in a relationship.

✅ Highlights from our most popular Season 1 interviews.

✅ A sneak peek at the topics and guests coming in Season 2!

Subscribe for more practical marriage tools and hit the notification bell so you never miss an episode of Season 2!

Chapters:

(0:00:00) - Introduction to Season 2

(0:01:04) - The Accidental Podcast: How It All Began

(0:02:25) - The Technical Learning Curve and Home Studio Challenges

(0:04:05) - The Mission: Reaching Beyond One-on-One Counseling

(0:05:27) - Radical Obedience and Choosing Yearly Words

(0:07:23) - The Philosophy Behind "Tools for Marriage"

(0:08:45) - Learning in Reverse: Avoiding Relationship Potholes

(0:09:49) - Communication Trap: The Myth of Mind Reading (Episode 1 - Trevor & Laura Black)

(0:10:47) - Defining Your Terms and Avoiding Assumptions

(0:12:37) - Intentional Connection: Couch Time and Walk-and-Talks

(0:14:11) - Supporting First Responder Marriages (Episode 2 - Mark & Annette Manley)

(0:16:42) - Personality Assessments and Ministry (Episode 5 - Brian & Linda Seitz)

(0:18:39) - The Power of the Tongue & Developing Curiosity (Episode 8 - Trevor & Laura Black)

(0:20:59) - Loving One Another Well & The “F” Word (Feelings), Feelings Wheel (Episode 4 - Kelly DuPée)

(0:24:01) - Fix vs. Listen & The Love Languages (Episode 6 - DC and Cookie Currier)

(0:26:44) - The 1st year of marriage & Premarital Counseling (Episode 7 - Max & McKenzie Walls)

(0:29:01) - Bucket List & Savor and Gratitude & How They Met (Episode 9 - Ron & Nancy Anderson - Part 1)

(0:30:22) - Restoration or Reconciliation from Infidelity (Episode 10 - Ron & Nancy Anderson - Part 2)

(0:32:55) - Meeting comedian Robert G. Lee on set (Episode 11 - Robert G & Anne Lee)

(0:35:06) - Prayer & Following the Holy Spirit (Episode 12 - Keith & Megan Peeler)

(0:36:45) - In Sickness and In Health (Episode 13 - Chris & Sheryl Solberg)

(0:38:10) - Peregrine & Lasagna Love (Episode 14 - Craig & Beryl Glass)

(0:39:40) - Humility and Reconciliation (Episode 15 - Eric Heard)

(0:42:00) - How We Love & Counseling (Episode 16 - Bagwell)

(0:43:26) - Sneak Peek: What to Expect in Season 2

(0:44:43) - Closing Thoughts and Community Connection

#marriageadvice #RelationshipTools #ToolsForMarriage #ChristianMarriage #CommunicationSkills #MarriagePodcast #Season2Launch #strongertogether

Episode 16 - Darren Bagwell Marriage & Family Therapist Shares Insights on a Strong and Healthy Marriage | Tools for Marriage

Join us for an insightful conversation with licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Darren Bagwell, as he shares his personal journey and professional wisdom on healing attachment wounds and moving toward secure connection in marriage. Darren unveils the critical role of your "Attachment Imprint," explaining why the high-achieving "Golden Child" identity often fails in partnership, and how the Anxious Pleaser pattern emerges. You’ll learn tangible, compassionate steps to integrate your Inner Child, utilize the Comfort Circle for safety and attunement, and embrace the 3 R's framework (Recover, Repair, and Reconnect) to transform conflict into deeper intimacy. This episode is a must-listen for any couple ready to stop managing surface-level conflict and start building a marriage defined by lasting security and heartfelt understanding.

Chapters:

(0:00:00) Welcome & Meet Darren Bagwell: Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist

(0:01:06) From Sociology to Diamond Sales: The Winding Path to MFT

(0:05:09) The Pivot to Counseling: Grad School, MFT, and the EMDR Approach

(0:07:10) Trauma is What Happens Inside: The Origin of the "Attachment Imprint"

(0:11:10) The Anxious Pleaser & Discovering the How We Love Model

(0:15:35) When the "Golden Child" Breaks: Marital Crisis and the Wounds from Childhood

(0:21:26) The Inner Child: Why Understanding Your Past is Key to Your Present

(0:33:40) The Comfort Circle: A Tool for Safety, Attunement, and Secure Connection

(0:42:00) Humility & Ownership: The Two Keys to Moving Through Marital Crisis

(0:47:00) Advice for Newlyweds: Marriage as a Process of "Becoming"

(0:54:30) The 3 R's Framework: Recover, Repair, and Reconnect

Show Notes:

Darren Bagwell - https://www.darrenbagwell.com/

Reunion Counseling - https://www.reunioncounseling.com/

The Formation Agency - https://theformationagency.com/

How We Love - https://howwelove.com

Tools for Marriage - https://toolsformarriage.com

About Darren Bagwell:

Darren is passionate about helping you navigate through the complexities of life in order to find the best solution available. Darren has clinical experience working with anxiety, depression, divorce complications, co-parenting, adjustment issues, addiction, trauma, and relational conflict. He enjoys working with individuals that feel stuck or struggling to find their path as well as couples, families and young adults.

Darren Bagwell , M.A., LMFT Marriage & Family Counselor

https://www.darrenbagwell.com/

949.274.3816

[email protected]

26131 Marguerite Parkway, Suite A

Mission Viejo, CA 92692

Episode 15 - 1,358 Weddings, 18 Re-Marriages, and Truths to Transform Your Marriage with Pastor Eric Heard | Tools for Marriage

Description:

In this powerful episode of Tools for Marriage, Trevor and Laura sit down with Pastor Eric Heard - a man who has spent over 50 years helping couples prepare, repair, and completely restore their marriages. With more than 1,358 weddings, 18 reconciled remarriages, and decades of working with marriages in crisis, Eric brings wisdom forged through personal pain, biblical truth, and years of pastoral experience.

Eric shares openly about his own story of abuse, separation, repentance, and miraculous restoration - and explains the practical tools every couple must master: conflict resolution, emotional connection, protecting covenant, dealing with bitterness, and understanding the spiritual battle behind relational division.

Whether you're preparing for marriage, fighting for your marriage, or supporting others in theirs, this episode is filled with transformational insight, humor, authenticity, and real hope.

Chapters:

(00:00) – Welcome & Introductions

Trevor and Laura introduce Pastor Eric Heard and set the stage for the conversation.(01:06) – Eric’s Story: Conversion, Calling & 51 Years of Ministry

How Eric came to Christ at 18 and began his journey into pastoral ministry.

(03:56) – 1,358 Weddings & a Lifelong Commitment to Couples

Eric discusses performing weddings, premarital counseling, and why he uses old-school folders.

(05:21) – The Beauty of Reconciliation & 18 Re-Marriages

Stories of couples who divorced and later rebuilt their marriage from scratch.

(15:10) – Growing Up in Abuse & How Trauma Follows You Into Marriage

Eric opens up about childhood abuse, normalized dysfunction, and its impact on early marriage.

(21:24) – The Turning Point: Separation, Confession & God Changing His Heart

The moment Eric realized his anger and abuse were destroying his marriage — and what he did to change.

(37:13) – The Four Cornerstones of Marriage: Permanence, Oneness, Nakedness & Intimacy

Eric breaks down the biblical foundation that shapes every healthy marriage.

(43:02) – Conflict Resolution Tools That Actually Work

The Disneyland Autotopia analogy, mirroring, and why most couples never learned these skills.

(48:06) – Teaching Men to Feel & Women to Use Fewer Words

Eric explains the feeling wheel, gender differences, and how to communicate more effectively.

(56:06) – Protecting the Covenant: Guardrails Against Betrayal

Practical boundaries, transparency, and the importance of safeguarding the marriage relationship.

Show Notes:

Standing Stone Ministry - https://standingstoneministry.org

Mariners Church - https://marinerschurch.org

How We Love - https://howwelove.com

SYMBIS - https://symbis.com

Relationship Lifeline - https://relationshiplifeline.org

Tools for Marriage - https://toolsformarriage.com @ToolsForMarriage ​

In this inspiring episode of Tools for Marriage, Trevor and Laura reconnect with Craig and Beryl Glass — a couple whose marriage has been shaped by faith, courage, and a lifetime of service. From smuggling Bibles behind the Iron Curtain to leading men’s ministries and delivering meals through Lasagna Love, their story is a powerful reminder that marriage is both an adventure and a ministry.

Listen as they share lessons learned from 49 years together, the importance of compassion and courage in godly manhood, and how small acts of love can ripple across generations.

1. (00:00) Introduction and Reconnection
2. (02:05) The Journey of Craig and Beryl Glass
3. (05:09) Early Years of Marriage
4. (08:12) Missionary Adventures in Europe
5. (11:03) The Risks of Bible Smuggling
6. (14:13) Stories from the Field
7. (17:11) The Lasagna Love Initiative
8. (20:04) Peregrine Ministries and Its Mission
9. (23:10) Father-Son Retreats and Their Impact
10. (35:01) The Journey to Manhood
11. (37:58) Creating a Passage to Manhood
12. (40:58) The Blessing Ceremony
13. (43:38) Core Qualities of Masculinity
14. (46:43) The Importance of Fathers
15. (49:37) Advice for Couples
16. (52:32) Navigating Differences in Marriage
17. (56:35) Faith and Ministry Together
18. (59:11) The Impact of Small Acts
19. (01:03:53) You Matter: A Message to Men

Peregrine Ministries - https://peregrineministries.org/
Lasagna Love - https://lasagnalove.org/
Tools for Marriage - https://toolsformarriage.com/

Episode 13: Wit and Wisdom with the Solbergs | Tools for Marriage

Podcast Chapters:

(0:00:00) Introduction to "Tools for Marriage" Podcast

(0:02:07) Chris and Sheryl's Meet-Cute Story

(0:03:57) The Spontaneous Pop-Top Engagement

(0:07:50) The Pros and Cons of Living Together Before Marriage

(0:10:52) Navigating Conflict in the Early Years

(0:13:19) Sex and Expectations

(0:15:22) The Five Love Languages

(0:19:55) The Importance of Communication and Mentorship

(0:22:15) Marriage and Raising Children

(0:26:06) Staying Connected as an Empty Nest Couple

(0:30:26) Advice for Young Couples

(0:40:48) Building a Legacy in Your Marriage

(0:47:03) Navigating Temptations and Guardrails

(0:56:45) Finding Community and a Love for Pickleball

(1:02:00) The Power of Partnership and a Lasting Impact

Show Notes:

SYMBIS - https://www.symbis.com/

5 Love Languages - https://5lovelanguages.com/

Tools for Marriage - https://toolsformarriage.com

Episode 12: Praying Your Way to a Stronger Marriage with Keith and Megan Peeler | Tools for Marriage

Podcast Chapters:

(00:00) Introduction and Overview of Everfree Ministries

(01:54) The Peeler's Marriage Journey

(04:20) First Date and Family Dynamics

(07:05) The Importance of Communication in Relationships

(09:53) Navigating Early Relationship Challenges

(12:44) Advice for Young Couples

(14:59) The Power of Prayer in Marriage

(17:21) Interactive Prayer and Spiritual Connection

(21:54) Building Intimacy Through Shared Experiences

(24:00) The Power of Prayer in Marriage

(25:01) Discovering Deliverance and Inner Healing

(26:04) Experiencing Spiritual Warfare

(29:54) Understanding Deliverance and Healing

(34:04) Navigating Resistance and Pushback

(39:04) The Role of Authority in Prayer

(44:35) Setting Expectations for Prayer Appointments

(47:09) The Power of Spirit-Led Prayer

(50:26) Navigating Life's Challenges and God's Guidance

(53:01) Understanding Authority in Christ

(55:30) The Role of Inner Healing in Physical Health

(59:31) The Healing Ministry and Its Challenges

(01:04:34) Empowering Women Through Healing and Identity

(01:07:10) Multiplying the Impact of Inner Healing Ministry

(01:09:01) Closing and Encouragement

Show Notes:

Everfree 2.0 Launch - November 7, 2025: https://kingdomcreative.mykajabi.com/fund-the-freedom

Everfree Prayer Community: https://kingdomcreative.mykajabi.com/everfree-community

EverfreeHER: https://www.everfreeprayer.org/everfreeher

Everfree Prayer: https://everfreeprayer.org

Episode 11 - A Therapist and a Comedian Walk Into a Marriage | Tools for Marriage

In this episode we feature the incredibly talented duo, Robert G. and Anne Lee . This is not your average couple - Robert is a seasoned comedian, known as Hollywood's top sitcom warm-up comic for over 1,500 episodes of shows like Golden Girls, Becker, Wings, and the last episode of Cheers. He's also a professional stand-up comedian with upcoming shows and was a writer for the beloved children's series, VeggieTales.

Anne, a gifted family and marriage therapist, and Robert, a master of humor, have combined their unique skills to create the "Humor, Healing, and Hope Marriage Retreats" Their upcoming book, “A Therapist and a Comedian Walk Into a Marriage” offers a humorous and wisdom filled take on marriage. Together, they offer practical, tangible tools, like the "25/5" communication method and the Marriage Emergency Toolkit, to help couples build strong, lasting relationships.

Podcast Chapters:

(0:00:23) - Guest Introduction: Anne and Robert G. Lee

(0:01:23) - The Story of How They Met at Ohio University

(0:05:08) - Anne's Journey to Becoming a Therapist

(0:10:18) - Robert's Career as a Sitcom Audience Warm-Up Comedian

(0:18:46) - The Realities of Living with a Comedian

(0:31:40) - The Launch of the Humor, Healing, and Hope Marriage Retreat

(0:34:06) - The "25/5" Tool for Communication

(0:59:58) - The Importance of Partnership in a Marriage

(1:11:44) - How to Connect with Anne and Robert

Show notes:

Tools for Marriage - https://toolsformarriage.comhttps://www.robertglee.com/

https://www.instagram.com/robertgleecomedy/

IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/name/nm1557883/

https://www.annewlee.com/

Marriage Retreat @ Lighthouse Church (Phoenix, AZ) - Nov 7-8, 2025

Episode 10: Is the Grass Really Greener? (part 2) | Tools for Marriage

This is the second of two episodes with Ron & Nancy. See episode 9 for part 1.

Ron and Nancy Anderson continue their interview with Trevor and Laura from "Tools for Marriage," discussing how they overcame challenges including infidelity, and now help other couples by teaching practical tools like establishing boundaries, maintaining transparency, and adapting through different life seasons. Nancy outlines practical steps from her book to protect and guard a marriage relationship.

Chapters:

(0:00:00) - Introduction to the Tools for Marriage Podcast

(0:00:24) - Building Your Fortress: Removing Pornography From Your Life

(0:02:42) - The HEDGES Acronym for an Affair-Proof Marriage

(0:05:04) - Educating and Satisfying Each Other in Marriage

(0:07:01) - Navigating the Different Seasons of Life and Marriage

(0:08:14) - The Power of Sharing Your Story: The Journey to Writing a Book

(0:11:05) - The Importance of Navigating Conflict with SYMBIS

(0:12:19) - Ground Rules for Healthy Conflict and Communication

(0:14:35) - Learning to Give and Receive Forgiveness and Grace

(0:16:56) - Navigating Conflict with Different Communication Styles

(0:19:13) - Habits and Intention: Opening the Car Door

(0:21:00) - Tucking Her In and the Feeling of Being Safe

(0:23:05) - The Importance of Being Authentic in Your Marriage

(0:25:35) - Speaking What Really Matters and Be Willing to Change

(0:29:35) - Nancy's List of 70 Things Before She Turns 70

(0:35:22) - Advice for Couples Getting Married

(0:40:05) - Phones and Addictions and Sharing Access

(0:43:42) - Advice For Your Younger Self

(0:47:25) - An Encouraging Word and a Concluding Prayer

Show Notes:

Tools for Marriage - ⁠https://toolsformarriage.com⁠

Avoiding the Greener Grass Syndrome: How to Grow Affair-Proof Hedges Around Your Marriage by Nancy C. Anderson - http://amzn.to/2BuQXPD

https://www.instagram.com/greenergrasssyndrome/

https://www.facebook.com/Greenergrasssyndrome/

http://nancycanderson.com/

Episode 09: Is the Grass Really Greener? (part 1) | Tools for Marriage

This is the first of two episodes with Ron & Nancy. See episode 10 for part 2.

This episode features Nancy and Ron Anderson, who share their remarkable 47-year marital journey. They begin by reflecting on their unique anniversary tradition of revisiting significant places from their early relationship. The conversation then delves into their diverse backgrounds and Ron's path to faith. The core of the episode centers on a profound crisis early in their marriage, where Nancy's affair and Ron's struggles as a husband led to a near-divorce. Through a series of events, including pivotal parental intervention and a miraculous act of forgiveness, they reconciled. The Andersons conclude by discussing how their experience now allows them to mentor other couples in crisis, emphasizing that marriage requires continuous effort, spiritual growth, and building resilience to withstand life's inevitable challenges.

Podcast Chapters:

(0:00:00) - Introduction to Tools for Marriage & Guests Ron & Nancy Anderson

(0:01:12) - Revisiting Early Years: An Anniversary Tradition

(0:03:17) - Ron & Nancy's Diverse Backgrounds

(0:04:01) - Nancy’s Writing and Her Book - "Avoiding the Greener Grass Syndrome"

(0:04:55) - Ron's Journey to Faith & Early Marriage Struggles

(0:11:56) - The "Greener Grass Syndrome": Nancy's Affair

(0:16:39) - Differences in Family of Origin and Expectations

(0:21:02) - The Crisis Point: Confession and Parental Intervention

(0:26:00) - The Miracle of Forgiveness and Reconciliation

(0:32:07) - Mentoring Couples on the Brink

(0:33:10) - Continuous Effort: Building a Fortress Around Your Marriage

(0:35:17) - Thanks for Watching - Please Subscribe

Show Notes:

Tools for Marriage - https://toolsformarriage.com

Avoiding the Greener Grass Syndrome: How to Grow Affair-Proof Hedges Around Your Marriage by Nancy C. Anderson - http://amzn.to/2BuQXPD

https://www.instagram.com/greenergrasssyndrome/

https://www.facebook.com/Greenergrasssyndrome/

http://nancycanderson.com/

Episode 8: Conflict & The Power of the Tongue | Tools for Marriage

This episode offers practical tools and timeless wisdom for couples seeking to transform conflict into deeper connection. Hosts Trevor and Laura, drawing from personal experience and expert research, reveal how healthy communication, empathy, and a "win-win" mindset can strengthen any marriage. Discover how to navigate disagreements, foster understanding, and build a thriving relationship where both partners feel heard, valued, and loved.

Podcast Chapters:

(00:00) A Cow Tongue and the Power of Words

(00:38) Tools for Marriage Opening and Vision

(00:59) The Power of the Tongue: Healing or Hurting Your Relationship

(01:30) Embracing Conflict: Why Healthy Disagreements Bring You Closer

(03:14) Oneness & Being on the Same Team

(05:33) Cutting Words That Crush and Wound

(06:11) Uplifting and Expressing Gratitude

(08:10) Marriage Is Like a Raft & One Heart

(09:41) How Many Conflicts Do Couples Have?

(11:00) Differences & Preferences

(12:20) Perpetual Problems: Understanding Unsolvable Marital Conflicts

(16:00) Keeping It Internal: Not Sharing Issues with Others

(19:15) Starting with the End in Mind and Win-Win Solutions

(27:08) Empathetic Listening and Curiosity: Understanding Your Partner's Perspective

(35:57) Marriage Research: Soft Start vs. Harsh Startup

(39:43) Navigating Conflict Styles: Turtles vs. Rhinos

(46:31) Keeping the Issue the Issue: Avoiding Personal Attacks

(49:19) How Can I Make Your Day Better?

(51:21) Essential Communication Tools: XYZ Formula

(52:33) Water Break & Fight or Flight

(54:40) Rewind or Reset

(55:51) Biblical Wisdom for Your Marriage

(57:57) Thanks for Watching Please Subscribe

Show Notes:

Tools for Marriage - https://toolsformarriage.com

Try Softer by Aundi Kolber - https://www.amazon.com/Try-Softer-Approach-Mode-Connection/dp/1496439651

He Wins, She Wins: Learning the Art of Marital Negotiation Hardcover by Willard F. Harley Jr. - https://www.amazon.com/He-Wins-She-Learning-Negotiation/dp/0800722515

John & Julie Gottman - https://www.gottman.com/

Doug Fields - https://dougfields.com

Marriage Matters - https://marinerschurch.org/events/