Welcome back to the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast. 

 

In this week’s episode, I’m talking all about CONNECTION, which in my view is a strong contender as THE word of the year!

 

Undeniably, the events of the past year have changed the way that we live beyond measure. And whether you’re fully aware of it or not, 2020 was really all about connection – our connection to friends and family, to strangers, to routine, to structure and everything that up until the last year felt familiar to you. 

 

And at the same time, somewhat paradoxically, it has also been about disconnection. In order to do our bit, we’ve been asked to stay apart from each other. We’ve been asked to stay at home and radically change the way we live our lives. As life slowly begins to open back up again, in the aftermath of the last 12 months, many of us are feeling more disconnected than ever from our families, friends, work and communities. 

 

And yet despite the intense hardships and loss, for many, this experience has offered an opportunity to re-connect with ourselves. The enforced lockdown brought with it a natural slow-down and an opportunity to pause, reflect and perhaps even to rebuild our connection with ourselves, which is the most important connection of all. You might have reconnected with some of the things you love to do, that took a backseat to normal, busy everyday life. 

 

If you’ve followed me for a while, you’ll know that I speak about connection a lot in my work – and in this episode, I share more about why this connection with ourselves is so important. I also talk about what it means when we are disconnected, and how to spot the signs that we’re not living in full alignment with our true selves.  

 

It’s a deep conversation, we cover a lot of ground through the course of the episode so you might even want to come back and listen to this again a few times. I share a lot of my own experiences and beliefs about connection, as well as the times when I’ve realised I’ve been living in a state of disconnection.

I so hope you find this episode helpful – and if it resonates, I’d love to hear from you. You can find me on Instagram here: www.instagram.com/1niamhennis or get in touch over on my website: www.niamhennis.com. 

 

If you’re enjoying this series, I’d love if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your favourite podcast platform. If you’re on Apple podcasts, leave me a 5 star review so that I can help get this information in front of more people.

 

Lastly, for more support from me and a supportive group of like-minded people just like you, I invite you to join The Changing Room, my free community over on Facebook. You’ll find us here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1 

 

Until next time, 

 

Niamh x

In this next episode, I’m sharing what has been an important realisation for me in recent weeks. I’ve been opened up to a totally new way of thinking about my health, sparked by a recent discussion series hosted by LiveLine, our national radio here in Ireland. It’s been a big learning for me and I’m sharing it with you because I think it holds an important lesson for all of us. 

 

As I shared in my last episode, following the death of both of my parents, I was diagnosed with both type 2 diabetes and rheumatoid arthritis. I’ve been managing and living with these conditions since then. My mum had diabetes when she was alive and I’ve always felt a sense of inevitability around being diagnosed with it myself. For a long time, I held the belief that it was hereditary, and I’d simply resigned myself to the fact that I’d just have to learn to live with the symptoms. 

 

Last year, when Covid-19 hit, I realised that now was the time to focus on my health and ensure I was as well and healthy as I could be. With the help of a really excellent hypnotherapist – Dr Niamh Flynn – I was able to make some positive changes and I am delighted to share that I am currently not in the diabetic range.  

 

But as I share in the episode, I’ve been surprised to realise that some of the issues and symptoms I’ve been dealing with, and thought were part of my condition, have not gone away. It was only hearing the recent conversation with Joe Duffy on LiveLine that my eyes were opened and I was able to acknowledge that I had been completely ignoring the signs that were there all along…

 

The body has an excellent way of talking to us – but the question is, are we really listening? 

 

So often, we ignore the obvious signs in front of us, because they don’t fit with the particular story that we are telling ourselves. It is my hope that by sharing my own personal health journey with you here in the episode that you can learn from this, and reflect on where you might be ignoring the signs that are in front of you. And that’s my TOUGH LOVE ENERGY for you today – DON’T IGNORE THE SIGNS. We all owe it to ourselves to feel as fit, healthy and able as we can. That’s my wish for you. Don’t suffer in silence. 

 

I so hope you find this episode helpful – and if it resonates, I’d love to hear from you. You can find me on Instagram here: www.instagram.com/1niamhennis or get in touch over on my website: www.niamhennis.com. 

 

If you’re enjoying this series, I’d love if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your favourite podcast platform. If you’re on Apple podcasts, leave me a 5 star review so that I can help get this information in front of more people.

 

Lastly, for more support from me and a supportive group of like-minded people just like you, I invite you to join The Changing Room, my free community over on Facebook. You’ll find us here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1 

 

Until next time, 

 

Niamh x

I’m really excited to share this next episode with you. In this episode of the TOUGH LOVE ENERGY podcast, I’m exploring a much-requested topic for discussion around how to create your own daily practice. 

 

If you’ve been looking for more information and guidance around how to create a sustainable daily practice that works for you, then look no further. This will be a value-packed episode, so you might want to listen with a pen and paper nearby so you can take notes about the particular things that resonate and inspire you.

 

As well as information around the ‘how’ and the ‘what’ of creating a daily practice, I also share with you about the ‘why’ – exactly why, I believe, having a consistent daily practice is so important for all of us. Indeed, it’s one of the first recommendations I make to my coaching clients – I strongly encourage (and insist!) that they put in place some sort of practice for themselves each day. 

 

What I want you to take away from this episode is that there is no ‘one-size fits all’ daily practice. For it to become a consistent and important part of your life, it needs to really feel that it represents who you are. Each of us are different, and so each of us will require something different. 

 

In this episode, I share with you a few of my absolute favourite personal practices, as well as giving you a few other suggestions for things you might wish to explore. My suggestion for anyone looking to create a daily practice is to introduce one thing at a time. 

 

I go deeper into my particular favourite practices, including breathwork, journaling and being in nature. That last one will come as no surprise to you, if you’ve been following me for a while! I also share my manifestation and visualisation process here – if you struggle to visualise the future in a way that feels real and grounded, this might be helpful for you to try. 

 

For me, creating a daily practice is all about making space. It’s my belief that, when we’re seeking to make changes in our life, in order to be in the right place to receive those changes we need to create space for them to land first. 

 

As always, there’s some TOUGH LOVE ENERGY homework to help give you the motivation to begin. I also propose the best ways to get started with your daily practice. For example, one such suggestion is to begin with just one practice and for only 10 minutes a day. 

 

If you’re enjoying this series so far, I’d love if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your favourite podcast platform and if you’re on Apple podcasts, leave me a 5 star review so that I can help get this information in front of more people.

 

If you’d like to be part of my Change & Transformation Community why not come and join us in my FREE Facebook Group:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1 

You’ll also find me on Instagram: www.instagram.com/1niamhennis

 

Until next time, 

 

Niamh x

 

 

For breathwork, I highly recommend Níall Ó Murchú. I came across Níall online, I really resonate with his voice and enjoy his work. You can find him online here:

o   https://www.breathewithniall.com/

o   https://www.instagram.com/breathewithniall/

o   https://www.facebook.com/breathewithniall/

 

FREE JOURNALING PDF

If you’d like to begin a journaling practice, I’ve got a free journaling PDF that you can download here: https://niamhennis.lpages.co/journal-for-greater-clarity. You’ll find 30 journaling prompts that you can use to help frame your journaling practice. 

For meditation, there are a number of apps you can use to help you such as Headspace, Insight Timer and Calm. I recommend finding a voice that you really resonate with. 

o   https://www.headspace.com/

o   https://insighttimer.com/

o   https://www.calm.com/

 

Hello and welcome to this week’s episode.

We’re often told that the things that hold us back from making changes or trying new things are our fears, doubts and limiting beliefs. Whilst I’m certainly not going to contradict that, I believe that some of the biggest blocks in our way are also the ones that are most often overlooked.

I’m talking here about our personal stories, the stories that we live our lives by. Over time, these are the stories that become such a big and huge part of who we are that often we may not even recognise their existence – nor even more importantly, question their truth.

We all have stories – they might be the stories around, why you are the way you are, or stories relating to certain aspects of your life, such as your relationships, friendships, work and / or money. Because stories protect us, they can become like our own personal suit of armour against the world, whether they are actually true or not.

In this episode, I share about a particular story which I allowed to envelop me, some years ago. I also provide a few examples of how and where stories may be showing up in your own life, and how these stories could be shaping your beliefs and the way you see the world.

Some of your stories may be true, but almost certainly, some of them will be false. What I invite you to consider is that, as our belief systems are rooted in the stories we tell ourselves, it’s hugely important to recognise how and where stories are showing up, so that we can look more closely at them and decide whether they are still serving us.

And of course, in case you thought you were getting off scott-free,  there’s some TOUGH LOVE ENERGY homework here for you in the form of some journaling questions to ask yourself. I think you’ll find them really powerful.

These are: 

You will also hear how I did the work to move beyond the stories which were holding me back, so that you can learn to do the same. It IS definitely possible to rewrite your story – I know, because I’ve done it, and I hope the episode will inspire you to take a look at your own stories and beliefs, so that you might find the courage to make changes of your own.

As always, I’d love to hear how this week’s episode lands with you. Once you’ve done the journaling exercise, please do let me know what realisations came up for you. If you’re enjoying this series so far, I’d  love if you popped over and subscribed to the show on your favourite podcast platform and if you’re on Apple podcasts leave me a 5 start review so that I can help get this information in front of more people.

Thank you so much to those of you who have written in so far and shared how much you’ve been enjoying the podcast – and to those of you who have sent across suggestions for future episodes. I’m already on the case with your ideas! 

Until next time, 

Niamh x

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If you’d like to be part of my Change & Transformation Community why not come and join us in my FREE Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1 

You’ll also find me on Instagram  www.instagram.com/1niamhennis

My website

Instagram

FREE Facebook Group

This week’s podcast feels a little self-indulgent but it is landing on Wednesday May 12th which also happens to be my birthday – the day that marks another 365 days of my personal trip around the sun. 

Each year, I like to use this occasion to reflect and look back on what I have achieved in the last 12 months, mostly, because I think we tend to focus more on the things we haven’t got round to doing, the things we tried and didn’t quite get right, the things we wish we had the courage to do. If we were to begin focusing more on what’s good in our lives it will automatically mean that we are spending less time on what’s not so good and that in itself has to be a good thing!

 So in this week’s podcast, I’m sharing my list of the things that I made happen in the last 12 months, not in a ‘aren’t I just great?’ kind of way, but in a ‘wow the last 12 months has actually been more eventful than I remember’.

In keeping with the Tough Love Energy™ feeling, I invite you to do the same. 

Why not sit down and list all of the things, big and small, that you feel were achievements, that you are proud of yourself for doing or having or feeling. I honestly bet you that your list will be much longer than you expect it too. 

And then why don’t we all promise not to leave it for another year to do the same thing again – every 3 months lets commit to checking in with ourselves and seeing just what we have to be grateful for in our lives

If there is something you would like me to address in future podcasts please feel free to ask me by emailing me on [email protected] 

If you’d like to be part of my Change & Transformation Community why not come and join us in my FREE Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1 

You’ll also find me on Instagram  www.instagram.com/1niamhennis

My website

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FREE Facebook Group

If you believe there's a book inside you then you need to speak with Jessica Killingley. You'll find her on @jessicakillingley on Instagram!

Grief is such a big topic that resonates with us all so differently. Our

connection to grief is as unique as our understanding of it and it is

definitely a topic I could talk about at length for hours.

However, for the purposes of this podcast I’ve honed on three

observations from my own personal experience with grief.

1. With the ‘benefit’ of hindsight having lived through loss, what I

know for sure is that grief changes you. It totally changed me and

the person I am now, speaking to you today, is a direct product of

that grief.

2. I also know that as result of my losses I became so terrified of

being abandoned again, of isolating others, that I hid how I was

really feeling and in so doing became the version of myself I

believed others would tolerate.

3. It took me four years (three years longer than it should have) for

me to be brave enough to ask for help. I was fortunate after a few

false starts to find the incredible professional support of Dr

Elizabeth McCrory (www.elizabethmccrory.com)

When we start to heal we can often find ourselves trying to find our way

back to being the person we were before loss entered our lives.

Accepting she has gone is hard.

I also know how hard it is when someone you know loses someone and

you haven’t been through that experience, it’s awkward. You’re afraid of

saying the wrong thing so you probably say nothing. But honestly it’s

okay to say to someone “I’ve no idea what you’re feeling but I do want to

understand it.” Fumbling is better than mumbling!

If you have never lost anyone, but know of someone who has, just know

that giving them space to talk about their grief, to talk about the person

they have lost is the best way you can support them.

In this podcast also I share with you the importance of not letting grief

consume us or to allowing it to define us. There is no getting over grief,

that phrase bothers me, but there is a way forward when the rawness of

grief eases where we can begin to put our lives back together. Slowly

and at our own pace. Life will never be the same but that doesn’t mean

life can never be good again. It’s okay to see that.

Grief Counselling / Therapy – Dr Elizabeth McCrory www.elizabethmccrory.com

If this podcast brings up some issues for you and you would like someone to share them with please feel free to email me on [email protected]

If you’d like to be part of my Change & Transformation Community why not come and join us in my FREE Facebook Group

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1

You’ll also find me on Instagram www.instagram.com/1niamhennis

Links for Niamh

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There’ll be no surprise that this week I’m talking about People Pleasing. It is coming up with all of my clients and in all of your questions. It’s hard to ignore right now so I’m tackling it head on.

In this podcast I look at just why exploring our people pleasing tendencies is so important and also so helpful. It shows us exactly why putting others first is the proof that we are disconnected from ourselves.  When we become so focused on being there for other we start to forget just what it is that we want, what it is that we like, even who it is that we like. We forget about that part of us that makes us, well, us!

Based on my extensive work with hundreds of women, in the last number of years, I present the 4 Types of People Pleasers and I’d really encourage you to see which one of these you are. When we fully understand our people pleasing traits it helps us to be more aware of them and their impact as they occur in our lives. 

I also share personal details of my own colourful past with people pleasing! It makes for a little cringing on my part but I also recognise it shows me how far I’ve come. As is the case with so many, it was when I went through some life changing events that I started to ask the questions about what it was that I wanted and what mattered to me. That was quite a process! But the end result was that I made some big changes, some hard ones, but feel so much more aligned and purposeful now than ever I was. Recognising and changing my people pleasing ways was the start of that process.

At the end I suggest some Journaling Prompts to help you find your own answers – this valuable exercise will tell you a lot and show you exactly where the work needs to be done. Trust it and trust yourself. I feel passionate about helping you change your people pleasing ways because when you  do you are declaring yourself ready for change. You are declaring yourself worth of change!

That’s why I’m pretty sure it’s not the last you’ve heard from me on this subject.

When you’re finished let me know which category you identified with most. Drop me an email to [email protected]

If you’d like to be part of my Change & Transformation Community why not come and join us in my FREE Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheChangingRoom1 

You’ll also find me on Instagram  www.instagram.com/1niamhennis

1:11 How we know we are suffering from the disease to please.

1:42 What ‘s the definition of a people pleaser?

3:56 The OG People Pleaser

4:53 The Smoothie

5:32 The Pretender

6:53 The Support Act

8:32 My Time as a People Pleaser

11:47 How to change your people pleasing ways

12:08 Practical next steps

15:06 Your Homework

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I’m not sure anyone reads these notes, but if you do, can I just tell you that my aim is that in this series you hear what you need to not what you want! There are enough people out there doing that, so you have been warned!

Kicking off this first episode of TOUGH LOVE ENERGY ™ PODCAST it’s impossible to ignore the global pandemic, but here we look at the impact that this shared and collective anxiety is having on us all and just how it is leaving us feeling a little more isolated and a lot more disconnected. I’m hoping this podcast series will therefore make you feel heard and give you somewhere safe to come where we will discuss topics that we are all struggling with.

I start this episode by setting my intention for the series, always important to do! Without wanting to assume anything, I give you a little bit of background information on who I am and what I do, for context. Then we dive straight into the difference between Change and Transformation and just what it means for each of us. 

In acknowledging that world events have the power to change everything I’m using this time to talk about all of the many things we can control. We can control how we react, how we feel and who we show up as. 

Then as I move into my Tough Love Energy Mode ™, I’ll show you how we are all hiding behind being busy and using the distractions of everyday life to avoid dealing with what’s right in front of us, and inside us. But no more! I ask you, is it not better that you discover exactly what you’re afraid of so that you can transform it? I also ask are you prepared to stop making excuses, saying you’ve no time, blaming others and not accepting responsibility for what’s happening in your life, right now? It’s your choice. It’s always your choice. 

Finally, we look at just what happens when we disconnect from ourselves, and how easily it happens without us even knowing it.  I couldn’t talk about this subject and not mention my online workshop RECONNECT – Detox from your People Pleasing Ways on April 12th from the safety and comfort of your own home. To secure your place and discover more about what to expect just follow this link https://niamhennis.lpages.co/reconnect

2:44 Setting my intention for this podcast series, 4:51 Explaining the difference between Change & Transformation, 6:42 Reminding you that you are not in control of anything but yourself. 7:28 You’re hiding behind being busy. 10:55 Stop making your crazy excuses. 13:08 It’s time for you to reconnect with yourself so that you can bridge the gap of how you show up versus who you really are. 15:54 RECONNECT Workshop – Detox your People Pleasing Ways 17:03 It’s your choice. Stay stuck or move past it. 17.40 Do 2 small things to move you forward.

https://niamhennis.lpages.co/reconnect

My website

Instagram

FREE Facebook Group

Welcome to Tough Love Energy the podcast where Transformation Coach and Writer, Niamh Ennis, shares with you the tools you need to transform that part of your life that you know is making you miserable. Working through a variety of topics you’ll leave each podcast feeling like you’ve had your very own 1:1 Coaching session with Niamh along with the practical next steps required to keep the momentum going! Be prepared to hear not what you want but always what you need!