Track Schmak

It was a race between Coach's guy (Jimmie Johnson) and Rob's guy (Clint Bowyer), and also between Rob's guy and Rob's alternate guy (Kasey Kahne). Even though Rob won the pool, he still lost the race within the race within the race. Also, who knew Kasey Kahne could triathalon faster than Jimmie Johnson? Chad Norris, that's who.

Also in this week's episode, more Denny Hamlin impressions, and a little bonus booth audio.

Picks for next week

Rob: Jamie McMurray (going on a limb)

Coach: Matt Kenseth (back to the safety driver)

Special circumstances caused us to not record last week, and our first attempt this week was met with horrendous Skype issues. So to get this one out, we recorded at different locations with a different chat program. Take a listen to see how it turned out.

For the record, this is the Jack Roush quote I was trying to find:

"If I was as diligent on that end as I am about finding out why a fuel pump broke, I might have been able to stop it," Roush said. "From my standpoint, he will be moving to the dark side. But the friendship part for us will survive. I've not lost respect for Matt and I hope he hasn't for me. I've enjoyed the 15 years with Matt and the success he's had as a driver. He is a cornerstone here and his DNA is all over this organization."

First, eww, second, he says "dark side" - i.e. Toyota, third, he basically says that he pays more attention to a fuel pump than his star driver. Leadership error to go along with his pilot error, I guess.

Anyway, the rest of the podcast is filled with all sorts of stuff - discussion about back problems (Hamlin), drug problems (Allmendinger), cheating problems (Stewart and Dillon), plus the usual schmakery foolery.

Picks for Loudon:

Coach: Jimmie Johnson

Rob: Clint Bowyer

When news breaks, we are here to schmak it! This week, Kenseth looks to hit the road as he is given his walking papers, Danica gets knocked off the road by Jaques Villenueve (I don't know and don't really care to check that spelling), and Clint Bowyer comes from the flat back road to the conquer the twisty hills of Sonoma.

With either good or bad coverage by TNT (depending on your viewpoint), we can all agree that road courses deserve a place on the schedule and are important for overall driver skill. At least, that's what the schmak crew thinks.

Also, something fishy happened with last week's picks - listen to find out!

Picks for next week at Kentucky:

Coach: Jimmie Johnson

Rob: Matt "Looking for a ride" Kenseth.

This week the schmak looks at a race that was interesting to start, and boring at the end... unless you were one of the thousands of Jr. fans in the stands and watching on TV, going Bat-poop insane. Then it was a mountain dew and volka miracle.

My keyboard is extra noisy this week. Also, I say "road rorse".

Picks for the road next week:

Coach: Marcos Ambrose

Rob: Tony Stewart

Two good races and two good schmaks lead up to this week's schmak. We talk dirty (Prelude to the Dream) and clean (the new and improved Pocono).

And a few easter eggs at the end.

Picks for next week:

Coach: Matt Kenseth (again. Don't let me down!)

Rob: Denny "The Hammer" Hamlin

Jimmie Johnson wore the Afro-circus polka dotted wig and horrendous paint scheme this week, which proves the point that it doesn't matter what you look like, it's what's under the hood that counts. Life lesson. Learned.

This week's schmak takes a look at Kurt Busch's suspension, his probably firing, and James Finch's 180 degree turn in statements.

When he hired Kurt Busch, he said: “I told Kurt, ‘I won’t fire you, and you won’t quit. We’ll do whatever it takes — roll in the mud if we have to to win.' "

This week: "If he's going to kill himself I'm not going to be in the airplane with him. If that's what he's planning on doing, I am going to get out."

Also, Prelude to the Dream. Ray Evernham! Danica Patrick! Tony Stewart! Ryan Newman! Clint Bowyer! and others!

Picks for Pocono:

Rob: Jeff Gordon

Coach: Jimmie Johnson

Coke 600, schmaked!

Lots of interesting topics - why is Fox so bad? What's up with Danica? What was up with the paint schemes?

Lots of thought provoking content, and a tease to some articles soon to appear.

Picks for next week at Dover:

Rob: Jimmie Johnson

Coach: AJ Allmendinger

It seems like this week, the All-Star race generated two kinds of reactions:

1) "Great! Could use some tweaks, but overall was pretty good"

b) "Horrible. Jimmie Johnson stunk up the show, and spent 80% of the show not even racing"

Trachschmak this week was divided along those lines, and delves into what was good, what was bad, and what needs to be changed to make the race better. Kinda like what we're supposed to do every week.

Ohh, and also, one of the schmakers admits on the air that he is becoming a fan of a certain team again. Also, this same schmaker will be on a boat this coming Memorial weekend, so next week's schmak may be a bit of work, but it will happen.

Also, this same schmaker won both picks last week, so he got to pick first this week as well.

Picks for Coke 600:

Coach: Jimmie Johnson (boring pick, but most likely to win)

Rob: Matt Kenseth (also influenced by Coach, so he can do no wrong this week).

Recapping a Darlington race most notable for its post-race scuffle, the boys also lament the skype suckiness that lead to the loss of last week's show, as well as the Fox suckiness that lead to a loss of excitement about Darlington.

Picks from last week:

Rob: Jeff Gordon (35th)

Coach: Carl Edwards (7th)

Picks for the Sprint Showdown

Coach: Martin Truex

Rob: Juan Montoya

Picks for the All-Star Race

Coach: Matt Kenseth (again. Sheesh)

Rob: Kyle Busch (again)

¡Lots 'o picks!

¡Get 'em while they're hot!

Our prognostication was in fine form last week, as all but one of our top seeds did well this week.

How will we fare at Talladega? Who knows, it's a crapshoot.

But more importantly, Trach Schmak takes an superficial in-depth look at the officiating of this week's race at Richmond.

Picks for next week:

Rob: Clint Bowyer

Coach: Dale Earnhardt Jr.

P.S. Listen to the "bonus" section of the podcast for the source of the title.