In this (one day belated) episode, Elle talks about her recent trip back home, to the small rural town she grew up in. In a sense, this activity is a rite of passage for LGBTQIA+ people, who often find the need to move away from originating contexts in order to be fully themselves. Elle discusses her fears and joys with the experience, and references a playlist that she used for coping, Pick Me Ups on Spotify.  Reach out to Elle with your input or ideas at [email protected].

Should I transition? This is a question a lot of trans people ask themselves at one time or another. The answer might seem obvious -- and it is for some people -- but it often is a little more complex. Elle talks about the process she went through to make sense of this choice. She reflects on support she received (like Dara Hoffman Fox's book on Gender Identity exploration) along the way, as well as the spirituality of the transgender experience. Other resources important during this time included: Love Lives Here by Amanda Jette Knox and Dazzling Darkness by Rachel Mann. 

[email protected]

Elle discusses the bad faith question from her perspective, including observations about TERF ideology, the erroneous conflation of sex and gender, and the existence of exceptions to the rigid rules extreme conservatives would like to enforce. She talks about Siddhartha Mukherjee's book "The Gene", Kate Borenstein's "Gender Outlaw", and Julia Serrano's amazing work on biology and gender. What do you think? What should she cover next? Send Elle an email at [email protected].

Elle talks about several assumptions that people in her life have made and expressed about trans people -- many of which have been harmful. She clarifies these errors from her own experience and references some excellent resources on the history of transgender people (by Susan Stryker), dismising the defunct theory by Ray Blanchard on autogynephilia, and challenging the asinine concept of "rapid onset" gender dysphoria.

Check out these resources for more information:

Susan Stryker's history - https://www.amazon.com/Transgender-History-Second-Todays-Revolution/dp/B0788V7F4M/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=susan+stryker+history&qid=1664214227&sr=8-1 

Julia Serrano's argument against Autogynephilia - https://www.juliaserano.com/av/Serano-CaseAgainstAutogynephilia.pdf

Here's a link to one of many scholarly articles that studied "rapid onset" gender dysphoria, finding that there is no clinical or research data to support the hypothesis - https://www.jpeds.com/article/S0022-3476(21)01085-4/fulltext#:~:text=Specifically%2C%20rapid%20onset%20gender%20dysphoria,child%20conflict%2C%20and%20maladaptive%20coping 

Elle talks about her experience as a parent who is transgender. Some of this includes dysphoria that came up as it relates to pregnancy (and specifically her inability to become pregnant), suicidality when considering going through transition, cultural judgments about "father figures" and the misogynistic, patriarchal, queerphobic assumptions that animate them. She also discusses the coming-out process for her kids, and how she and her wife tried their best to make it non-traumatic for them -- and even giving agency where possible. She concludes with a brief discussion on the concept of "brainwashing" for parents, and how worldview formation is sometimes mistaken as something inherently negative.

Elle references Daneen Akers "Holy Troublemakers and Unconventional Saints" and "Educated" by Tara Westover.

Contact Elle at: [email protected]

In this episode, Elle talks about people who disappeared from her life after she came out as transgender and began her transition. Recently, she became aware of some of the reasons for this disappearance; she addresses them in this podcast. Some of the additional themes include: drawing boundaries, dealing with gaslighting, the pain and fear of coming out, the reasons queer people stay in the closet, and a request to believe LGBTQ people when they tell the truth about their lives. Reach out to Elle at: [email protected]

Here's that post by Mardi https://www.instagram.com/p/Ch76YmdrwR8/

Also, I really like this lady's stuff on how to change our voices to better suit our needs - https://thevoicestylist.com/