Outer beauty or inner beauty, is one more important than the other? Is attractiveness summed up by facial features, complexion, figures, and physiques? Can you use metrics like symmetry, the golden ratio, or symmetrical deviation from the average to determine a person’s desirableness? Or, is beauty something that comes from deep inside a person and works it way out?

Skin Deep Beauty

Let me say from the start that I fall firmly in ‘beauty comes from within’ camp. But, that doesn’t mean that you are free to neglect your outward appearance.

The woman I married has a beautiful soul, but, honestly, I would never have taken the time to find that out if she wasn’t attractive outwardly. People will rarely look past mismatched outfits, straggly hair, and bad breath to see if there could be a beautiful person underneath. They will assume that outer ugliness is a direct result of something not right on the inside.

Inside and Out

So, to me, the key is to first make sure you are a person of beauty on the inside. Then, make sure that beauty manifests itself on the outside.

Since I am a Christian and I know a lot of you are Christians, let me deal with an often misunderstood scripture.

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. – 1 Peter 3:3-4 (NIV)

Peter is not saying that your outward appearance doesn’t matter. He’s not saying it’s wrong to patronize a hair salon or wear jewelry. What he’s saying is true beauty comes from the inside.

And the great news is that your inner beauty doesn’t diminish as you age. Parts of your physical body are susceptible to aging, solar radiation, and gravity. Things start to droop and sag and wrinkle. Hair turns gray or turns loose.

But, age has no effect on things like kindness, gentleness, and faithfulness. Those are things gravity has no effect on. They are also things that you have the ability to develop and that God and men value.

Actually, I should have said that God and most men value those things. Some people do judge strictly by appearance and don’t value the truly valuable things. Who needs them? Don’t waste your time with those type of people.

The Outside

As I pointed out in this post from May 2017, the thing about outward beauty is that you have only a limited ability to change your outward appearance. You can change your face and body somewhat.

Your Face

You can exfoliate, moisturize, and wear sunscreen. on your face. You can learn to use makeup better. And, anyone can learn to use proper eye contact and smile genuinely. Never underestimate how much more attractive you are when you flash an appropriate, genuine smile.

And, if you have the budget and are really desperate, I suppose you could you could try plastic surgery.

Your Body

Through exercise and good eating and sleeping habits, you can make the best of your body. You might not turn your apple shape or a pear-shape, like mine, into a manly V shape or a perfect feminine hourglass shape, but, there’s still a ton of value in exercising, eating well, and sleeping enough.

Those things allow you to make the most of the body you do have. And, they promote good health which is attractive and helps you feel more confident, which is also very attractive. When it comes to your face and your body, do what you can, and don’t waste time worrying about what you can’t change.

Your Clothes

You can also dress to emphasize your strengths and diminish your weak spots. Let me give you two little tips about clothes.