>‘This so called comedy, is about four guys who have come together to ‘watch over’ their suburban neighborhood, Glenview Ohio, United States on Planet Earth.

In this serene safe heaven lives Evan Troutwig (Ben Stiller) a dull, civic minded guy who loves his wife Abby (Rosemarie Dewitt), his neighborhood and his mangerial job at Cosco.

After the Cosco night watchmen is murdered, Evan decides to form a ‘neighborhood watch’ to find the culprit and make sure something like this never happens again.

The only problem, only three guys show up at Evan’s house for the first meeting…

There’s…Franklin (Jonah Hill) who still lives with his mom and has a large collection of guns hidden under his bed…Bob (Vince Vaughn, a tough talking dad with an uncontrollable teenage daughter, and the recently divorced and extremely horny, Jamarcus (the funny but underused, Richard Ayoade)

To Evan’s dismay, these dudes are more interested in drinking beer and shooting the breeze then doing any serious ‘watching’.

But that all changes when…

One evening, while out on patrol, the boys vehicle hit something that leaves behind a trail of green goo and they wind up finding a strange bowling ball like device that emits a beam of energy capable of destroying…well…practically anything and everything.

They also find a tentacle and from there, our fellows realize…THERE ARE ALIENS IN OUR MIDST.

Funny right? Hmm…not SO much.

The film is filled with tired sexist bits that we’ve all seen before, unfunny jokes and tired performances from Stiller and Vaughn. Only Ayoade brings to his part a few moments of humor, but definitely not enough to make this movie written by Seth Rogan (along with Jason Stern and Evan Goldberg) worth seeing.

‘The Watch’ directed by Akiva Schaffer opens in theatres, Friday July 27, 2012 and received a very low bagel score from both John and myself.

Wait for the DVD.