Two Things You Should Never Say to a Victim of Covert Narcissism (Special Throwback Episode)

There are some things that people should just never say to a victim of narcissistic abuse, and specifically covert narcissistic abuse. As a victim myself, I know that It is so hard sometimes to find people who understand and actually know how to provide the unique support that this victim needs. They need to feel heard and validated in a way that most people don’t seem to understand.

In this episode, I discuss two things that people should never say to these victims, two things that you don’t want to hear in your world right now, and why they are so problematic.

1 - "Well, marriage does take effort."

2 - "You know, It does take two."

Yes, marriage does take work. There are conversations that are hard, but there is a huge difference between conversations that should be hard and those that simply should not. Whether to move or not is a tough decision and should be hard. What do you want for dinner should not be a difficult conversation. Some conversations should be hard, but they should not ALL be hard!

Yes, it does take two to make a strong marriage, but it only takes one to destroy it!

If you are in the position of offering support to someone who is struggling in a narcissistic relationship, please know that this person feels utterly exhausted and completely overwhelmed. They have been working in overdrive and making absolutely no progress. Please do not add to their feeling of hopelessness by telling this these two things. Instead, help them to see that they are not solely responsible for fixing their marriage. It does take two, and they cannot fix this without some give from their partner too.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY RENEE SWANSON, COVERT NARCISSISM PODCAST, AND CNG LIFE COACHING IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT TO BE USED FOR DIAGNOSIS PURPOSES AND NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE.

THIS MATERIAL DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL. IT DOES NOT CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON HAS NARCISSISM AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS MATERIAL TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION OR SUPPORT A CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE MATERIAL AND INFORMATION PROVIDED.