Hi,

Even as I share all this with you, I feel a bit shaky. The astrology of the past month and a bit has accurately reflected my life - shaky ground, murky waters, tumult and uncertainty. I offer this episode of Tending Lilith’s Fire (listen to the podcast version or click here for the YouTube video) and these writings that came through me on June 30, 2021, hoping that sharing my own experience can help you feel less alone if you’re going through it, too. And if you have been, I also recommend checking out last year’s Priestessing the Priestesses conversation about radical compassion for the Jewish holy day/portal of grief called Tisha B’Av, recorded around this time.

Complicated Soil

All month, cards pulled have pointed to and heralded creativity.Artistic outletsButI’ve used up all my energyon breathing in and outkeeping my coolevolvingin complicated soil.I point my blossom headstowards the sunphotosynthesizegrow so tall, I can’t help but bendall the way to the earthtouch my root/toesdrip seedsand waitfor the strengthfor rain soaked cellsto stiffen stalksand pull my back up straight and tallso I can once againface the sky.

Liminal Waters/Drowned Women Song

This week,this monthhave felt like pools of uncertaintyI never know if I’mswimming or drowningwill the next gulpbring sweet breathor burning lungs?Am I being carriedto or away from shore?The deep is a dark womband it’s tempting to stay down.The surface brings sunlight,a sparkling magic showbut also waves that push and pull mein opposite directionsuntil I have lostup and downand there’s only herein this quietin this in-betweenwhere I find my spindly limbsturning me aboutwishing I’d grow a powerful, shimmering tailor emerge from the waveswalking upright on hardy legs.I thought I was a sirenbut now I’m a selkie stripped of her skinA mermaid who traded her voice for legsthen found herself back in the water,drowning and silent.————I don’t know who you are but I wishyou’d reach for mepull me to safetywith strong arms, gentle handstake me to your castleon land or in the seaI don’t care which, as long as you teach meto breathe.And once my lungs refill,I’ll sing.The song of all the drowning women before methe song we sang before we were skinned,filleted, deboned, and mounted on ships.The song of power, yearning, sisterhood, of life and death.The song of everything that love is. I don’t remember the song right nowbut I swear,if you save me, take me home, breathe life and voice back into my body, give me a soft place to land, fill my belly and let me sleep untilall my loss has walked off into my dreams,I swear, when I am whole and well again,my song, our song will return.It will sing me.It will pour out of me.The voices of all those drowned womenwill return.Their song, our songwill save us all.It will heal us all.Please bring me home.Teach me to be whole.I will be a vessel that can sing forthour collective liberation.

A prayer for salvation:

What’s with my constant desire to be saved?I’m tired of saving myself.I want a lifeline.With a soft ring of preservation for me to grab onto.I’ve been treading water for so long.I’m tired.Save me, Mama. Save me Goddess. Save me Beloved.Kadosh Baruch Hu. Shechina.All the power that is outside of me orinside of me.Save me.I can’t do it all by myself.

Today, as the sun moves into Leo, may we find our sea legs. May we feel well, comforted and supported.

If you are finding your feet and would like some Spiritual Guidance or a card reading to help align you to your path, even if you cannot see it, I can help. Reach out to me to book a Transformation or Flash of Insight Reading.

Blessings,

Annie

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